Has anyone chosen private/alternative school for dyspraxic child, how has it helped?

[HonoriaGlossop]

or any child with a specific learning difficulty?

I would really find it helpful to know if anyone has moved their child from mainstream to private, and why, and what sort of difference there has been.

My ds has dyspraxia and a few things I'm seeing him struggle with in his big class of 30 are really, really getting to upset and worry me. Don't know if I can fix this by moving him to a school where the classes are much much smaller, but I do wonder.....

ds is at a private school. The curriculum includes lots of physical activities such as swimming once a week, games (which he dislikes but has to do !), music, DT and textiles which have been good for getting him enjoying things he would n't otherwise choose to try iyswim. He's in a class of 20 and sets are smaller still so lots of attention . You do need to be careful though as not all private schools are set up to give extra help one-to-one or in small groups (as ds has had for handwriting and touch typing) and extra one-to-one can be chargeable. We've found ours supportive of ds but some can be dismissive and focus mroe on their results and high achievers.

Hi LIZ! thanks for that...I must admit I did wonder about finding an appropriate school, which is why I mentioned 'alternative' schools in the title; I know many private schools would be as you say, focusing on the results, etc. Did you choose private in part BECAUSE of your ds' difficulties, or was it a choice you made anyway IYSWIM?

I agree about checking out their SEN provision, and how much they understand dyspraxia and similar. Some are better than others, and just because they are private does not mean they are up to date.

Have a look around some and ask.

We had put his name down when he was 3 as we were going abroad for a while and weren't sure we'd get our LEA preference on our return. His problems were identified at almost 6 while we were overseas. We decided then that smaller class sizes would suit him better on our return since he was used to a maximum of 14 and wasn't severe enough to be problematic in class but would probably just blend into the background in a group of 30 . Fortunately a place became available at that time, so he started at Year 3(now Year5).

Ds was in the school (private) already when he was fagged up by the SEN department who sugested that we see an ed psych. He gace ds a dx of dyspraxia.

Ds is doing very, very well and is making real progress. (he is 7 btw) His reading is imrpoving, as is his handwriting, and this week he has gone back into the 'ordinary class' for his spelling practice. He has 10 hours of 1 to 1 support in the classroom and sees the SENCO for an hours extra lesson each week.

The school is particularly good for children w=ith SEN, as the classes are small, the support excellent and the general ethos very positive. there are a fair few children there with ADHD, mild ASD, and dyslexia/praxia.

Be warned though, not all private schools are as good with children with SEN , or as welcoming

flagged up! god what a typo!

fagged up by a whole department, sounds painful!

OK, i will start to have a look at some schools I think. I don't know if we can even afford it; but I've witnessed lately ds trying desperately to play with the other boys, who either ignore him completely or tell him he can't play as he's too slow. Ds was literally BEGGING them tonight to play with him and I had to pretty much drag him away from them to avoid the situation

I just felt a much, much smaller school might mean that socially he might not be exluded to this degree

Feel a bit lost, really, am just scrambling for ideas.

Oh HG that is rough.

It is tough. I think go and have a look around. I'm not sure there's a school in the country where some boy doesn't say 'we don't want him, he's too slow' but your chances might decrease slightly if it is a smaller class and the school has a good provision and ethos towards your son.

Like MB's school.

to give you an idea of the school ethos.

at the preprep sports day, one little girl fell over in a race. the boy running next to her stopped, picked her up, and they held hands and finished the race last together!

To a huge round of applause.

It is that sort of school.

ahundredtimes, you've hit the nail on the head. I know we've all been rejected by other kids when we were little and I don't want to get hysterical about it.

It was just seeing ds literally begging them that was so disturbing

Maybe I need to toughen up about it. I don't know! Am lost. But yes, I did think that if the classes were much smaller it's less easy for the social side of things to go awry or be completely missed, perhaps.

oh mb, that does sound a special place! Certainly not what would happen in ds' school Don't spose you're on the south coast, at all, are you?

Yes, where are you? I'm coming too.

Oh no HG please don't misunderstand me. I didn't mean you should toughen up.

I think you fishing around for a good environment for your ds is really important and proper.
But it isn't easy seeing things like that happen, I know, I've been there!

I'm not sure DS2s school is right for him. It is a private school. And its very organised which works well actually, but it's a bit, oh I don't know, just wrong.

no, dont worry ahundred, I didn't think you meant that

Interesting to hear that your ds2's school isn't feeling right....it's so hard, isn't it!

Ds doesn't seem overly troubled by how the boys were with him today, but that is only making me imagine that this is what happens to him, every break, every playtime, every day! I will make an appointment to talk to the teacher about the social side of things.

and i will start to visit one or two schools....

Yes, do that. Good plan.

I think though that it can seem as though it is all the boys in the class who are playing football and running around. And then you look more carefully, and there's Jonny, the one in specs who doesn't 'do' football and then there's Whathisname who gets his feet muddled sometimes and always loses his jumper, so you have to make a move on them, even if your ds hates them! Do you know what I mean?

sorry, not on the south coast!

I wish that they could clone it. they have done so well by ds.

In the summer he told me that he was really worried about going up to the prep site (they have lots of different teacher, have to move classrooms etc). But he loves it. The staff relaised tat he would find the transition difficult and put things in place to help him cope.

they have been equally good with helping dd cope with dh's diagnosis (ds doesn't know that dh is terminally ill, just that he has cancer)

I do know what you mean.

Feel absolutely wrung out with it today though. Will drink wine, and deal with it a bit more tomorrow

Thanks for the support.

Oh yes, definitely do it tomorrow and have a large glass of wine now.

MB. It is a stellar school isn't it? But you don't deserve anything less it should be said. [loyal]

Also I imagine a weight off your mind knowing that they are happy and catered for at school?

You don't teach there do you? No, you teach in a secondary school. [talks to self, takes off specs, polishes them, blinks at the blurry room]

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Now why do you say them, in particular?

Just to echo the "it depends on the school" consensus. Many private schools either don't have the requisite experience & understanding, or (the more cynical view) just aren't interested in square pegs of any kind - but there are quite a few which are not only accepting and experienced, but positively welcoming. The Good Schools Guide is I think quite reliable on that - there is a special sub-guide on SN provision.

As to "specialist" schools - my ds is at one (a SpLD - "specific learning disability" school) at the moment, and it's done him lots of good - particularly in giving him emotional peers (the social alienation issues we had before completely resolved), and in making physio and OT absolutely top of the agenda (an essential, I now think, for children like him).

But the fees are eye-watering - that has to be taken into account, as if time at a school like that is a sort of therapeutic intervention, from which you move on to a more mainstream school - which we're hoping to do now.

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There's a school called Browns in North Kent, and it is supposed to be an excellent place with the prime objective of helping boys with dyslexia, dyspraxia and other related specific learning difficulties back into mainstream education as soon as they are ready.
So people do clearly make this choice Honoria, but as bink says, it really, really depends on the school.
Ours seems to support children with this sort of SLD very well I have to say - class sizes and a good SENCO are responsible for this. It is a small non-academically selective independent school which is not results oriented. It does seem to help children with a wide range of academic ability reach their potential at 11 plus.

Is that the one that Ruth Kelly sent her dc to?

Wow that is expensive