Move schools?

[RebaJ22]

DS5 is really struggling with being back in school and the change of routine which is coming with it, he's suspected autism, no diagnosis yet as no one seems to be listening, including school.

He's always loved school and started off excited to be going back last Monday but by Wednesday he was lashing out, refusing to get ready and saying he hates school, he's also started wetting the bed. This is carrying on During school and he's lashing out at anyone who gets too close to him, is too noisy around him and he's refusing to do any work. His understanding is of a 2 year old but physically is the size of a 7/8 year old, he's not quite got the hang of rights and wrongs yet, he also can't communicate his needs properly which is causing him to lash out even more.

Due to his behaviour and the type of parents there is at the school I've started receiving threats of beatings from other mums, because he's hurting their children, and this is the first I'm hearing of him lashing out. School aren't informing me of any incidents, they don't seem to be removing him from the situation, I asked if he could possibly have time in a quiet space and his teacher said "he needs to just control his tantrums". It doesn't feel to me that they are taking his needs into account or doing anything to help.

I think this post is more to just get it all off my chest as I'm really struggling, mainly with being threatened on a daily basis. I'm considering putting him into a different school, but would I be unreasonable to do that?

Have you tried going above the teacher and asking for a meeting with the SENCO and /or headteacher. Sometimes they will take action when the teacher does not we have found. Take some-one with you for back-up and emotional support.

You need to pass on any threats you receive to the headteacher. It is totally unacceptable that you are left in this position. Leaving your child without support is a safe-guarding issue for him and the other children in the class and school needs to sort this out. You need to direct the complaining parents to voice their complaints to the school and not you.

If there is still no action then, yes, consider moving schools but make sure by talking to the SENCO of any prospective school that they are better willing to put in support. It may also be that long-term your ds needs an EHCP so that his needs are better met - you can apply for this yourself if the school is unwilling (he might qualify based on both academic and behavioural grounds on what you have described).