We've just had my daughter (who has just gone into year 9) diagnosed with moderate dyslexia/very slow processing speed/dysgraphia. Sounds like we were in a similar situation to your DC, bright child with no noted problems in primary school (top tables etc.), who started struggling a few months into Year 7 at our local grammar. We saw evidence of her frustration and slow processing speed/persistent poor spelling at home and spoke to the secondary school. One year later, she was on the SEN register, but apart from a couple of organisational workshops during year 7/8, no further support was given. A few tests were conducted at school which highlighted processing difficulties and poor working memory, but there was no definitive problem highlighted.
Watching her struggle at school and her self-esteem plummet lead me to investigate specific learning difficulties and I found out about private testing.
We attended the ADC in Maidenhead at the end of July this year. I found it through the BDA online and it was reviewed as a reputable organisation and being a charity, was the best price I could find online.
Fast forward 8 weeks and we had a diagnosis, a comprehensive report and a list of suggestions.
School have already invited us back in and have since started copying all communications to learning support, her form tutor, head of year, and pastoral head.
It just feels like we are being taken more seriously now with a formal dyslexia diagnosis.
I also think that although the school my daughter attends is, by all estimations, a well-funded school, the funding only extends so far. All the good intentions of the SENCO can only go as far as funding will stretch.
The ADC have also supplied a list of suggestions for school/home which include:
25% extra time in examinations; differentiated homework (my daughter spends up to 6 hours an afternoon on homework that should only take her 2 hours);
Various technology-assisted learning techniques and programs;
Recommendations for tutoring in specific areas;
A reader for examinations if possible;
A list of topic-specific vocabulary provided before starting a topic so she can practise spelling it/recognising it;
Touch-typing programs and
Providing handouts for lessons/peer notes from class/ advance notice so she can have sufficient time to read set works etc.
These, of course, are all suggestions and the school is not legally obligated to do anything. Luckily, they do seem to want to help in our case and am sure will do what they can.
Also, the fact that my daughter now knows that she is not 'stupid' or 'dumb' as some of the meaner girls have called her (and it's not just mum who's telling her this) has helped her immensely.
My advice would be that if you can afford private testing, or can make sacrifices to allow you to save up and test sooner/more comprehensively than school are able to, go for it.
And trust your intuition. I dismissed my daughter's problems for many years, as I was told how bright she was/well she was doing at every single primary parents' evening. My gut feeling told me that something was not quite right, as spelling and reading abilities did not correlate with her abilities otherwise.
Testing sooner would have perhaps preserved her self-esteem and allowed us to place her in a more appropriate school setting for her needs.
Anyhow, we have got there in the end. You know your child best and need to go with your gut. And try not to feel guilty if you find a learning difficulty later on: if educationists find it difficult to spot learning difficulties at times, chances are some of us parents are also likely to miss it.
I hope that you manage to get things sorted and wish you and DC all the best :)