Boarding school for undiagnosed 4 ASD boy.

[livinginaprison]

My son has ASD but it is not confirmed (but almost certain). He is in a mainstream private school and doesn't not get any additional support.

I would like to send him to boarding school around Surrey/London. I find his behaviour is too challenging at home. His need for constant routine is painful for all of us.

Does anyone know of a good boarding school that supports children with ASD.

How old?

Opening Op says 4. If that’s not a typo, then 4 is so so so young. I have no advice that I think you want to hear.

OP are you having any support at all? The first thing you need to do is get a definitive diagnosis. If you are seriously considering boarding by the sounds of it you will need an EHCP, however no school will not offer boarding at 4. Mainstream private’s are often not the best places for support.

I can give you some names if you want to go down the private route to fast track. Feel free to pm.

It can be hard but focus on the positives of your ds and with the right support if he is only 4 so much can be done to help him.

I haven't posted for a while and never before in this area but I didn't want to read this and not comment.

Like you I have a 4 year old undiagnosed as yet due to long waiting lists. I live in London/Surrey. I am on my own with him and have limited support. School offer no support as he masks his behaviour and he is academically able. Day in day out it is hard, the harder than anything I could ever contemplate, it is isolating, lonely and restricting - so I understand that part of your post completely.

I don't understand however that you just want to pack him off to boarding school because it's too challenging. He is your son and he needs you. He needs you to advocate for him, to be there for him, you are the one person who can make the world less scary and life generally more comfortable for him. He needs you to be there for him. 4 years old is too young for a child to be boarding hence the minimum age in the UK is 7. If he needs residential support then he doesn't need a boarding school he needs specialist provision.

Get the diagnosis, you mention private schools and boarding schools so go private if you have to. Once you have it explore the options available to youm

(Sorry posted too soon.) explore the options available. There is support available whilst you are going through this. Get an Early Help referal from your GP or Health Visitor.

Appreciate the answer isn't what you were looking for, but your child is still so young and it is within you to care for him you just have to dig deep and understand life will need adjustments.

OP- it sounds like you need some help.
If your dc is age 4, then he should be at home with you developing the relationship between you. It is just very hard, but you have to adapt your life to accommodate your dc. Work fewer hours maybe so you can be home more? Go along to support groups? Get some help from your gp too to keep yourself fit and healthy mentally. It's hard work. Good luck.