Deflated & emotional 11 year old who doesn't want to go to school - much needed help!!!

[wefster]

Hello All,

My nephew Dee has began Year 6 and is finding classroom life utterly upsetting. He excels in sport, is super creative but struggles tremendously academically, in particular: comprehension, reading, spelling and numeracy (he's performing at a Year 3/4 level). A statutory assessment was completed aged 7 and he received a Statement of Special Educational Needs. Dyslexia was discussed, but as results from the assessment were just below the Dyslexia spectrum, it was felt 'unhelpful' to label Dee as Dyslexic (my sister (Dee's mum), my mum and nan are Dyslexic).

As you can expect from a child facing daily 'classroom' challenges, he has very low self esteem is his academic abilities and is acutely mindful that his numeracy, reading and spelling levels matches that of his younger brother (age 8).

The school on the whole have been wonderfully supportive and have assigned a support teacher, but Dee is now struggling to accept this help. The support teacher has tried to engage with Dee both inside the classroom and in a separate area, but he is unwilling to have the presence of a support teacher in close proximity to his classmates. This weekend was particularly upsetting, as he was very expressive and tearful "I don't want help, I feel embarrassed, I want to be treated the same, I don't want to go to school...".

I'm in absolute pieces, as I want to take away the pain, but he needs support. Any guidance, especially as secondary school looms ever closer and strategies to help him through each day would be ever so gratefully received.

Yours,

A concerned Aunty

I suspect that what he needs is specialist dyslexia teaching rather than just having someone supporting him in class. It might be worth considering specialist dyslexia schools as it can make all the difference to a child's self esteem to be in an environment which is wholly geared towards his dyslexia so that he doesn't need individual support or, if he does, he is no different from his peers.

The council should in any event now be carrying out a reassessment with a view to issuing an EHC Plan for his secondary placement - they have to do this by February 15th and they have 20 weeks for the process. It has to be said that a number of councils aren't bothering to reassess but in your nephew's case it sounds as if it is necessary. Assuming your nephew's LA hasn't organised reassessment, I'd suggest his parents contact the LA urgently to "remind" them that this isn't optional under the Special Educational Needs Act 2014 (Transitional and Saving Provisions) Orders of 2014 and 2015.

My DC went to a "wonderfully supportive" primary school which totally failed to meet their needs. My eldest was told by an LA specialist teacher at secondary that he should have been called in by the primary school, they failed to notice DC2 had any issue (but they went on to get 25% extra time in the stricter new criteria brought in by Mr Gove) and DC3 they were shocked got a diagnosis - as they'd been blaming them for everything that went wrong.

Lovely schools don't always do what is right, and sometimes would rather keep their SEN budgets in house. Your nephew needs specialist trained help, a TA is not enough. But don't artificially inflate his grades in SATs, its better to get just below levels than scrape above - as there may be more help in secondary that way.

Praise him for his hard work.

Thank you both for taking the time to reply - your comments were most welcome and helpful.