please help me....

[Zazzabeans]

so sorry for the long post but i REALLY need advice.
just had child psychologist out to see my son josh 11 lh, he has seen him several times before but wanted to get a feel for him in his own home. He has basically said that he contacted joshs consultant who said that i am a very anxious parent and magnify things a lot (i think josh has asd, however none of the proffesionals are taking me seriously) he also spoke to ed pschy who assessed josh when he was 6 and wont assess him again because she feels like he was ok 6 year ago. He also said he had been on the phone to joshs new school who said they think i ring up far too much, i have rang 3 times in 3 weeks with very valid reasons, 1st time was to double check everything was in place for josh (senco was on maternity so another senco was in and she said she was very greatful i had rang as a lot of the info hadnt been passed on to her) 2nd time was to tell them his new insoles and shoe raises had given him a blister so he would be wearing trainers , 3rd time was because he said he was forced to do pe despite his leg hurting, he actually plucked up the courage to sit out and was told most certainly not, get in and get involved.
now knowing all of you are in the same boat as me with hemi children, i really dont see what the problem is. i am absolutely livid.
the pschologist has basically just sat here and disregarded anything i mentioned to him in the past and is reffering to what the ed psch told him, joshs problems are down to his speech and language problems.
We started to fill out some form for autism assessment 2 weeks ago and now he is saying he is reluctant to go ahead as i seem very anxious and maybe its my anxieties causing josh to be like this.
i am so angry and frustrated right now, i am crying my eyes out.

Hugs. I have a nine year old with right hemi. Have you joined hemihelp or hemichat? (Really good fb forum for hemi parents) ASD/learning difficulties etc does go hand in hand with hemi. Is the Ed psyc a LA one or a private one?

Hi, yeah I'm on hemichat also .
It's a LA ed psch :)

Okay I don't have all the answers - it is bad that these people have such an attitude so I can only make a few suggestions which may or may not be of any use at all so feel free to ignore.

So firstly with regards to not assessing him or not believing what you say, can you make a diary/list of all the incidents which support your view regarding ASD. I started to do this so I could say to the consultant a list of all the things which were causing me concern (eg watching the same DVD 54 times in a month, refusing to sit in a different chair, crying un controllably if he was given a class detention, hysterical when we didn't win the raffle prize, various friendship problems etc etc). I provided this list to them and said I wanted it on the record that these things had happened in the last 6 months and I was asking for an assessment. Can you put things in writing about wanting an assessment and being refused? Also is there another adult who can get involved (father or grandparent or someone) who can speak to these people and help make the case so it isn't just seen as you being overprotective.

Secondly with regards to school, the chances are that they aren't seeing things at their worst because kids do tend to hold it back a bit at school and then meltdown more at home. Sadly I also found that if I provided a lot of support at home then it masked the difficulties - so for example I was getting all the books ready every day, helping with all the homework etc and it wasn't until I stopped doing this that there was a crisis/meltdown at school and school then stepped in to provide more help (by way of reducing homework, homework help cards, time out cards etc).

Schools generally prefer to get notes sent in about shoes vs trainers etc rather than phone calls. But regarding the PE when his leg was hurting, I would be on the phone speaking to the SENCO and complaining big time on that one - I had to do something similar when my DC was forced to do a 1500m cross country run and could barely walk the rest of the week - I made a huge fuss about making adjustments for disability etc. so I agree you certainly needed to make a phone call there. But I am afraid I did have to learn to really think and think again before I made any calls and only make them if absolutely necessary as secondary schools don't like them!

Hope things get better. It is such hard work getting support for our kids, I am sure you are doing a great job.

Wow, thanks for the reply.
Have been really thinking hard tonight and out of all the professionals involved with him , gp, consultant, salt, ed pschy, pschologist ,ot no one has any real concern around asd.
However he also has dealings with a neurologist, who said she is happy to do some neuro pschologist assessments on him, she is rather interested in hemiplegia, so may wait the outcome on this.
I think he has aspergers as doesn't fit the asd criteria, he struggles with all social aspects.
The professionals are seemingly wanting to out all of this down to his cerbral palsy, but as a parent I think there's more to it.
My husband is very supportive with all of this and takao thinks there's something not quite right :(