children with aspergers and inevitable change - sooner rather than later?(long, sorry)

[deaconblue]

Ds has aspergers traits and doesn't cope with change or difference as well as NT dd. He is improving and made the transition from reception to yr1 really well. He goes to a small village school and has one very close friend and gets on well with most of the other children.
Our concern is that the small undersubscribed school we chose has become a totally full school this yr. His class size is 28 but by yr 3 it will be 37 mixed yr3/4 children. We always intended to send the dc's to independent secondary school but are now considering moving them to the independent primary linked to our chosen secondary school so that they will benefit from class sizes of max 20.
My question then is is it better to move ds at the age of 7 so that he can benefit from smaller class sizes and get to know other children at an age when friendships still seem quite fluid and children are more accepting of those who are a little different or do we wait until he's 11? He's really happy, so confident and loves his best friend so I fear he will find a move terribly distressing but then a move of some kind is inevitable when he goes to secondary school.
What do you think? Is there a better age to inflict change on someone who hates change?

My (unqualified) thoughts are that it is not so much about an age to do change as how to manage the change, at the end of juniors I would expect the children to be talked to constantly about the move to seniors, they know they are going and if your ds needs extra support then he might have more 1:1 around that time and maybe extra school visits...

My ds had this with TA before reception to yr1 move, he also visited the next door class room (his yr1) one a few times before the new academic year to help him with the transition and picked his own new peg in the year 1 cloakroom area, all helped him visualise the change before he started and reduce his anxiety. I would think the same would be for your ds at what ever stage you decide to move him, if the move would have a significant benefit to his education then its worth doing when you feel its right not at a particular age.

I wouldn't move him in all honesty, yes i see that much smaller class sizes may well benefit him, but how many teaching staff are in each class in the independent school? is it just the teacher and 20 children? though the class size in your current state school may well be bigger they staff ratio will more than likely be better in his current school.

Independent schools are not always the best place to educate a child with special needs tbh. They will expect you to provide and pay for any additional support the you DS will more than likely need. If your lad needs to see an Educational psychologist for example they will expect to pay for this also. Not that im saying the school you have in mind wouldn't be suitable but these extra costs are something the you would be wise to factor in, after all it would be awful to move him and then find that the didn't have the experience to meet his special needs.

thanks for the replies. We will definitely need to check out what experience the school has with children with aspergers, although I think it's not uncommon these days so would hope they have already had children through their school with similar needs. He has no academic needs, really all he needs at the moment is a little extra time devoted to him when activities are changing as he tends to need plenty of notice when they are moving from reading to circle time for example. Our school only has 1 teacher and 1 TA to the 37 children who are currently in yr 3, this may of course change in the two years til ds is that yr group.
I agree about the importance of preparation verybusyspider - ds' teacher went through exactly the same process with him as with your ds between reception and yr 1. I think ds would need double the visits an NT child would get when changing school

Hi shoppingbags,

re your comment:-
"He has no academic needs, really all he needs at the moment is a little extra time devoted to him when activities are changing as he tends to need plenty of notice when they are moving from reading to circle time for example"

Staff don't always have the time or the inclination however to do that; to have at all addressed at all then he will need a Statement. My statemented son was given both extra visits and time for transition to Juniors and Secondary; if he is not statemented then he may be treated the same as the others when it comes to such transitions.

I would think about applying for a Statement now as well because if his additional needs are not met then this will have a knock on effect on his learning as well. It can all so easily fall apart in secondary schools as some of my friends have found out:(.

I would also agree with the comments re Independent Schools; they are not always the right environment for children with SEN. At the very least you will need to do your researches beforehand and thoroughly as well.

Thanks. We've been told there's no way he'll get a statement as his diagnosis is of aspergers traits not syndrome and he's coping so well at school he no longer needs the 1-1 hours he had in reception.

What matters most is the attitude of the head teacher and SENCO and staff, really. If they are caring, cheerful, 'can do' people who love a child being in their school, then they'll always find a way to make it possible for us to learn and thrive in there. If they aren't, (no matter what the school size or class size), we're doomed.
I learned this from ds's four changes of school over the 13 years. I moved him to a school with smaller class sizes and it was a disaster. Bigger school was far better for him. Yet the next one with supposedly good support was also a disaster, and we had to move him to another that happened to have smaller classes....but it was the attitude of the heads and the staff that was the difference each time.

Hi shopping,

re your comment:-

"We've been told there's no way he'll get a statement as his diagnosis is of aspergers traits not syndrome and he's coping so well at school he no longer needs the 1-1 hours he had in reception".

Who told you this piece of misinformation?. Coping well at school is not the same as actually being able to fully access all parts of the curriculum (also there is the social side of school where children are expected by other children to conform).

You were spun a line there unfortunately. If I was given a £1 for every time so called professionals told me the above or similar I'd be very wealthy by now. Don't fall for it.