Possible Asd?

[Anxio]

Hi,

I'm worried about my DS whose 25 months and still not responding to his name, although he can say words he doesn't communicate (ie tells what he wants/needs).

Some of the red flags include:

• not responding to his name
• not pointing towards things he wants/identifies (he does point when in nursery rhymes)

-lines up Lego's rather than build them

He knows the alphabet and can count to 20 (not just in sequence but recognises the letters/numbers). He also fills in nursery rhymes when I stop, I read to him and he listens to stories without understanding I'm guessing.....

We spoke with a Paed and he's referred for a hearing test and a has referred for an appointment as well as an assessment as waiting times are over a year we have been told.

We've had a SALT assessment (private) and she mentions he is delayed and to encourage communication through play/songs etc which we are constantly doing....

So I don't know what the next best course of action could be (not relying on this for a medical opinion as we will follow through with the assessments but as parents but just some possible advice and guidance ie for those parents who have been through it you might have some invaluable info that if yo knew earlier would've helped etc).....I was thinking about ABA (as this couldn't do any harm or am I jumping the gun ).

Sorry for the long post.

ABA can do harm. A quick Google of ABA experiences will show you that most autistic people consider it abuse. It's all about getting them to act neurotypical without taking into consideration all their sensory differences.

My son does ABA through SSD and it has been very helpful. He has had wonderful ABA teachers as well as speech and OT. They work with the individuals needs, and in my son's case to help him learn, grow, and achieve goals that are set for him. ABA can be beneficial for the individual because it's more one on one attention and their needs can be met more easily. Their main goal is to help the individual learn and to grow at their own pace and they work with his sensory needs as well.

Thanks for the responses, interesting views and I must admit slightly nervous about taking any further steps as don't want to cause any harm.....

He's still young and we've got him into a nursery now too, but still no major improvements (some small ones) he's been in for a couple of months, but at the same time conscious that this is probably best age he needs the help hence why I'm thinking along the aba route.

Still waiting for hearing/further tests but that's taking forever due to COVID backlog.

How did you get on?

I think the best advice you can get regarding ABA is listening to the adults who experienced it as children. Not the parents of children who they put through ABA.

It's a minefield and I hope you find a team of professionals who want to look out for your child's best interests and who can recognise his strengths and work with then xxx

We're actively exploring the ABA route and have found a provider (case manager)/tutor etc- trying to arrange ABA is quite difficult though as finding tutors to help and nurseries to agree is not straight forward. We are hoping to commence the training in the first term back to school-fingers crossed.

An interesting point you made there around speaking to children who have gone through it, tbh I don't think I've come across a post with the actual person giving a first persons perspective it's always been parents.......

Are you on Facebook? There is a great group called Autism Inclusivity ran by autistic adults with the aim of teaching parents how best to help their autistic child. Their insight has changed our lives. They often post information about why ABA is harmful and abusive. They find it harrowing to talk about as a lot of adults who went through it now suffer from PTSD, so it might be best for you to search thr group rather than ask the question again. If you want I can find you the link which they often post to explain why not to use ABA. Anything I can do to help save your child from it.

And I speak from experience, before I found this group I was so unknowledgable and just blindly follow the advice of Google or professionals without realising there was so much more quality information out there. I just didn't know where to find it xxx

Thanks Bumbleton -appreciate the help a link would be helpful and also what alternatives are there to ABA? As far as I have read that seems to be the only option for helping younger children......

Well if you join that fb group, they will tell you.

But basically you don't need to "treat" the autism. Autism is just a neurotype. The ONLY thing you need to do is teach acceptance. He will be up against a world designed for neurotypicals. If he accepts himself for who he is, he has a fighting chance.

Autism can impact on things like speech and language, social communication or sensory processing.

So for speech and language you need a good speech and language therapist. They can support him with things like flexible language (using "sometimes", "maybe", "probably") which can help with flexible thinking. They might use visual timetables or now and never boards or social stories. Stay away from PECS, on the whole, because it can be ABA based.

An OT can help with sensory needs. They will assess what they are and provide a sensory diet.

My (nearly 5 year old) son had difficulty with gross motor skills so we also required a physio.

We knew thay my 5 year was autistic when he was 5 months old so I was all for "early intervention". I felt like I was letting him down every minute that I wasn't doing therapy thinking about it or researching it. I wish I had known then what I know now.

The autistic Community, and I, can tell you that autistic children will flourish in their own time and at their own pace with the right support from the people around them. You need to be his mum first and foremost and if you accept him for who he is, instead of trying to change it through abusive techniques (and they are abusive- ABA is known for withholding love/affection/hugs/food, unless the child learns to override their authentic self and behave like a robot to fit in with the neurotypical majority), then he will need little else.

Salt/OT/Physio will just be a helping hand.

I'll have a look for the link now xxx are u on fb?

Now and Next boards*

Here is a great resource to look at xxx

stopabasupportautistics.home.blog/2019/08/11/the-great-big-aba-opposition-resource-list/?fbclid=IwAR1Wpmbgy4ruvoX91AAb5IDKKazzbSDO4bMAWly5UWh7c7QJSQ6RzleY_SQ

Thanks Bumbleton for the information, I've been reading through it not sure what to do now tbh.... I mean I've noticed improvements ie he now has more words but struggles to communicate properly.....he loves nursery rhymes/alphabets/numbers, we have SLT for him already and will continue using her for now.

It's difficult as every now and then when you don't see much in terms of progress you almost feel you aren't doing enough yet both myself and my partner spend so much time with DS.....I know you will prob say we shouldn't measure progress but your almost always asking the question are you doing enough or is there something else you can be doing

Yes I know exactly what you mean. I lived that hell for 3 years. It made me ill.

But really, I'm not the best person for you to be speaking to. I'm just another parent of an autistic child. You need to be speaking to the people who used to be our kids. You need to rethink how you measure success.
There is a massive neurodivergent community out there who are trying to change things for the better for their "next generation". They would be happy to help you.

Follow your gut instinct. If something doesn't feel right for your child then it most probably isn't. Take your time to get educated so you can make informed decisions xxx