Advice needed, what would you do?

[Strangecat]

My partner (we are not married) and his friend are starting a company. His friend is literally just helping and does not have ownership. My partner own 100% of the business.
Since the start, we always said that we need to work together and build it from the ground up together and this is still the plan. I will have an official title of Operation manager or something similar.
Now, the problem I am facing is that I don’t have any shares. When I brought this up, my partner assured me that I will have shares and told me whilst his friend is involved, he prefers to wait.
We live together, have young children and did separate for a short period of time.
I don’t want to work my arse off and end up with nothing. If successful, this company could generate a lot of money.
what do you suggest I do?

You know the answer, if you want to have some say and control in the business you need to be a shareholder and director, not fake made up titles. You then also need a robust shareholders agreement.

Just be aware that with being a director that does also come with responsibilities and liabilities so you need to be sure that you do want to be in business with your DP. If that's iffy, don't work in it for nothing.

You don’t even have a director title. You don’t have shares, and I’m guessing you don’t have a contract of employment (because you’re an employee at this point). I wouldn’t be doing any work for this company at all.

I feel like he is using the carrot on the stick to keep me going and motivated. I am fully ready to take all responsibilities that comes with the title.
As with any business, the first few months to a year, you don’t really pay yourself. So, if anything, I am screwed. Do I ask him for a written agreement? Do I need witnesses?

Yep, exactly. This should be my position! But in reality I am doing work.

If you don’t have shares, then you should be getting paid—otherwise, you’re working for free with no security. The fact that you’re posting here suggests you have some reservations about his reluctance to make it official, and you know best whether that’s something to worry about.

Is he generally good with paperwork and legalities? If not, do you want to be legally involved in a business where the person in charge isn’t on top of those things? On the other hand, if you trust him completely and genuinely enjoy the work, what have you got to lose?

I’ve helped loads of friends and family set up businesses without charging because I love the excitement of building something new. But I also know that if my husband had started something without me—even before we were married—I would have felt completely left out!

I guess it comes down to whether you’re happy to work on goodwill alone or whether you need something more concrete to protect yourself.

From a business perspective you'd be mad to provide free labour for no return.

You need to be building up your own career & income, not his.

Being unmarried with young children makes this even more critical.

Perhaps the wider issues belong on the relationship board, but overall this guy is screwing you over. Whilst you're looking after his young kids and working for his business you're building up nothing for yourself. If/when you split you'll be entitled to none of his assets (not the house, car, business, anything in his name). A man who truly wants to share life with you would marry you in tie situation.

Plus, if you are in committed relationship then the tax benefits of having more than one shareholder should come into play. If he is willing to forfeit that rather than legally bring you in then that says a lot about how much he values you.

Basically, you need legal protection in the form of marriage & shares. Without those your priority should be building your own career which can support you without him.