Debating giving up

[Weedsorwishes]

Hi all first time posting on this board. I'm loosely following slimming world but finding it really hard. My children have various food restrictions and I feel that the meals we all eat together as a family aren't very slimming world friendly so I end up cooking something for everyone else and I have a slimming world meal

I don't know whether to just focus on healthy food rather than slimming world. I'm very interested in a whole food approach sort of deliciously Ella style and love things that nourish your body eg nuts seeds olive oil avocado etc none of which are really SW friendly

Maybe I need to just accept my new size, for context I'm the biggest I've ever been due to lockdown weight gain etc my BMI is 37 but I don't think I look too bad but maybe I'm kidding myself!

I keep seeing clothes in shops and think oh I'll wear that style when I'm slim but maybe I just need to wear them now!

Don't really know what I'm trying to say but can anyone relate!

Ok, harsh talking here...... SW is focusing on healthy foods, there is a massive range of free foods you can have so if your children won't eat what you need to then you'll have to bite the bullet and cook different stuff. You can have nuts, oil, avocado on SW, they are just synned that's all, with good reason. Nuts can form your HexB and be part of your daily plan.

Accepting your new size is basically giving up and making excuses. A BMI of 37 is really high, you are definitely kidding yourself, and I say that as someone who has done the same thing so I'm not trying to be mean.

If you are going to do any diet - and actually SW isn't really a diet, more of a lifestyle change in how we eat - you need to commit. in for a penny, in for a pound, it's a dead easy diet to follow, there's no counting calories, or running out of food you can eat so you should never feel hungry on it. Rather than loosely following it, join a class, go for the meetings and get into it, then you will realise exactly how easy it is.

Thanks for your reply @Dozycuntlaters

You are right that my BMI is too high

I'm 5 foot tall and 13.4 stone

I've been doing SW since Jan (starting weight 13.10) and got down to 13.1 but it seems impossible

The maximum weight for my height is 9stone1 😭

Do you go to the meetings? I honestly couldn't do it at home, but going to the meetings really gives me a kick up the arse, it's well worth the money. I have a long way to go but I started at the end of July at 15st 1 and am not down to 13st 7, so another 3 stone to go. I want to shift at least another 1.5 by Christmas which will leave 1.5 for the new year. Honestly, get to class, it will really help. You get loads of tips and advice from the other members.

Tbh I've never understood the difference between a diet and 'a lifestyle change in how we eat'. It just sounds like an exercise in re-branding to me. Whatever you call it, it only works if you stick to it long-term, and if SW is clashing with the OP's lifestyle/family situation, then sticking to it long-term is even less likely than sticking to any diet ever is for anyone.

OP - try just eating 3 nutritious, filling meals a day. Avoid highly processed foods and sugar as much as you can, and cut down on processed carbs like bread. Drink plenty of water.

Oh and don't focus on results, just habits. Weight will slowly come off. Companies like SW and WW make their money from the fact that almost everyone falls off the wagon and has to kerp coming back!

I’ve been struggling with SW too and we are on a break at the moment as I’m about to go on holiday. I find the weekly weigh ins make me anxious and it very much feels like one step forward, two steps back. I lose two pounds one week then the next week I’ve gained three and it’s really demoralising.

It feels as though bloody everything is a syn - I had 45g bran flakes for breakfast one day then beans on a slice of wholemeal toast and that was nearly half my syns for the day. I feel constantly hungry and it’s really getting me down.

I really, really want to lose the weight but I’m struggling with it so much.

It will be tempting for someone to try and give me some tough talking here and be rude about me thinking it will help, but I’d greatly appreciate it if you didn’t. I feel shit enough as it is and im just sounding off.

When you say 'loosely following' what does that mean? Are you going to SW group, doing it online or just doing your own version of it, OP?

I tried fasting. Really liked the idea if it, and the alleged health benefits, but it seriously messed with my digestion!

I used to be a member of SW but I got so sick of them saying you could east as many free foods as you like but you'd have to syn an avocado.

The logic isn't there. I know someone who lived on muller lights at 100cal a pot but because they were "free" it was OK.

Still calories at the end of the day!

I gave up in the end, my BMI hit 41 and I was morbidly obese. I had a gastric sleeve at the end (not recommending this for a quick fix or anything because it's certainly not)

Have you tried calorie counting? I found it a lot more flexible than SW and used my phone to track calories.

Also read a book called Why We Eat Too Much! It's super insightful.

Wow that alot of replies

Forgot to say I'm breastfeeding my toddler just at bedtime so don't really want to fast or anything like that

I'm doing it online.

I eat very well but obviously too much of it 😂 I also exercise alot eg walk at least 3 miles a day on school runs, plus I swim one evening a week I try to do 20 lengths in 30 mins plus I do one gym session a week normally 20 min treadmill at a fast walk, 20 min I cant remember the name of but it's arms and legs at the same time plus a mile (10 mins) on the rower.

A typical day would be like today food wise

Porridge (40g) with a tablespoon on seeds and nuts on top with chopped banana or pear or raspberry or blueberries

Milky coffee for snack.

Lunch is usually soup (today was homemade but has coconut milk in so high syn) plus I had a cheesy crumpet

Dinner is tomato pasta bake with a jar of sauce with Tuna and sweetcorn mixed through with spinach and cucumber on the side

I drink 1-2 nights a week will usually have a bottle of wine with my husband one night and a bottle of cider the other night

Usually have a bag of crisps or a bar of chocolate if I'm having an alcoholic drink

Biscuit at toddler group a few times a week

I'm on the 10 a day fruit and veg thread too but I don't get 10.a day!!

Oops forgot to say usually one treat meal a week so either a takeaway or a not healthy tea eg hotdogs and wedges. Usually a weekend

Also drink a shed load of water. At least 2-3 litres a day, plus 1-2 coffee and 1-2 teas

You can’t loosely follow slimming world and expect to get results - it only definitely creates a calorie deficit if you do it as it’s supposed to be.

That much wine or cider is pretty unlikely to leave you syns for things like jars of sauce or crumpets, nevemind chocolate or crisps.

What sort of foods are you having to avoid for the children that mean you can’t just make everyone the same thing?

Hmmm... so basically you're not following SW at all. Jars of sauce are loaded with syns as are chocolate, crisps and wine.

Going to group you can get all kinds of ideas for sweet or savoury snacks to replace the ones you're eating and they'll give you ideas for low calorie alcoholic drinks too.

Why not get yourself the Pinch of Nom cookbooks? They have loads of ideas for meals that everyone in the family will enjoy but are very low syns/calories.

Then do a meal plan for the week and stick to it. That's the only way you'll lose weight.

Having such a high BMI really isn't good. But you know that.

SW is not focussing on healthy foods. It’s focussing on a low fat, high carb diet. It doesn’t teach you about the nutritional value of food because calorie counting is ‘bad’. It values shit like muller lights. Shocker - full fat Greek yogurt with berries actually tastes good, doesn’t need tonnes of bloody sweetener (like zero fat does) and has considerably more nutritional benefit than a muller light. Greek yogurt and berries has a tiny amount more calories than a Muller light but will fill you up for significantly longer.

I did SW. I lost a load of weight with it. I also lost a load more while calorie counting and having about 30 syns a day - syns made up of olive oil, seeds, nuts, avocado. For some, it is a lifestyle choice. They can absolutely live their life on Frylight, having a steak and jacket potato when they go out and curly wurlies. For many people, it’s not a lifestyle, despite the branding the consultants sprout in meetings. If it’s a lifestyle choice, you don’t fall off the wagon. If it’s a lifestyle choice you don’t need to attend group every week to maintain your weight because you know what you’re doing and do it without thinking. It’s not a lifestyle choice if people get fed up of eating platefuls of pasta, stop following the diet and put all the weight back on.

Personally, I really rate calorie counting. Although I did become really obsessive about it and following on from SW didn’t help when I decided I’d finally had enough of restricting myself. The value of calorie counting for me is you can see the macros. You can see the nutrients you are getting. You know the value of a food and you decide if you want that chocolate enough to use 200 calories on it and you can eat the chocolate you want, rather than another bloody curly wurly.

I would focus on making better food choices and staying away from processed foods. It doesn’t always have to be perfect but you don’t have to have the guilt for falling off the wagon. It’ll be a slower route but hopefully more sustainable. You can also focus on fitness instead. You already walk several times a week and swim. If you focus on getting faster with those, maybe introducing another exercise, you can start to focus on improving your body to match your fitness goals.

@InTheNightWeWillWish

SW is not focussing on healthy foods. It’s focussing on a low fat, high carb diet. It doesn’t teach you about the nutritional value of food because calorie counting is ‘bad’. It values shit like muller lights. Shocker - full fat Greek yogurt with berries actually tastes good, doesn’t need tonnes of bloody sweetener (like zero fat does) and has considerably more nutritional benefit than a muller light. Greek yogurt and berries has a tiny amount more calories than a Muller light but will fill you up for significantly longer.

I did SW. I lost a load of weight with it. I also lost a load more while calorie counting and having about 30 syns a day - syns made up of olive oil, seeds, nuts, avocado. For some, it is a lifestyle choice. They can absolutely live their life on Frylight, having a steak and jacket potato when they go out and curly wurlies. For many people, it’s not a lifestyle, despite the branding the consultants sprout in meetings. If it’s a lifestyle choice, you don’t fall off the wagon. If it’s a lifestyle choice you don’t need to attend group every week to maintain your weight because you know what you’re doing and do it without thinking. It’s not a lifestyle choice if people get fed up of eating platefuls of pasta, stop following the diet and put all the weight back on.

Personally, I really rate calorie counting. Although I did become really obsessive about it and following on from SW didn’t help when I decided I’d finally had enough of restricting myself. The value of calorie counting for me is you can see the macros. You can see the nutrients you are getting. You know the value of a food and you decide if you want that chocolate enough to use 200 calories on it and you can eat the chocolate you want, rather than another bloody curly wurly.

I would focus on making better food choices and staying away from processed foods. It doesn’t always have to be perfect but you don’t have to have the guilt for falling off the wagon. It’ll be a slower route but hopefully more sustainable. You can also focus on fitness instead. You already walk several times a week and swim. If you focus on getting faster with those, maybe introducing another exercise, you can start to focus on improving your body to match your fitness goals.

Thanks @InTheNightWeWillWish your last paragraph really resonated with me.

“It’s focussing on a low fat, high carb diet.”

Hmm… it’s low fat, it’s only high carb if you eat a lot of carbs - that’s a choice though.

“It doesn’t teach you about the nutritional value of food because calorie counting is ‘bad’. It values shit like muller lights.”

Well it doesn’t value shit like muller lights, if people prefer to use syns on those over chocolate, wine or whatever, again, that’s a choice.

It should teach you the basics of nutrition too tbh, everything is there in the pack, your low calorie veg is a better choice than carby ones, foods high in protein are marked because they’re the ones you want to go for next after the non carby veg, foods high in calcium are marked as that… it says foods like avocado and nuts are nutritious and healthy but just too high in oil and calories to be in with the free foods.

“if you want that chocolate enough to use 200 calories on it and you can eat the chocolate you want, rather than another bloody curly wurly.”

200 calories of chocolate is 10 syns worth… no reason you couldn’t have had that instead of a curly wurly… some people prefer 2 curly wurlys over a bar of actual chocolate, but that’s the same decision with calorie counting.

Some people get on better with calorie counting, some people get on better with slimming world… just depends what you prefer…

but that description of slimming world is like me saying calorie counting encourages you to eat smaller portions of junk food instead and replace meals with chocolate because it’s the same calories instead of making changes to how you eat and cook because that’s how I worked calorie counting when I tried it.

Calorie counting, three healthy meals a day, no snacking, lots of water. I think slimming world is largely nonsense personally.

There is a huge difference between ditching Slimming world and giving up on losing weight entirely.

Personally I detest slimming world and everything it stands for. Some mushed up ryvita with quark and gelatine is not a cheesecake FFS.

There are plenty of other ways to lose weight that don't resort to making fake aways out of cauliflower and trying to pretend it's normal.

@Weedsorwishes

Wow that alot of replies

Forgot to say I'm breastfeeding my toddler just at bedtime so don't really want to fast or anything like that

I'm doing it online.

I eat very well but obviously too much of it 😂 I also exercise alot eg walk at least 3 miles a day on school runs, plus I swim one evening a week I try to do 20 lengths in 30 mins plus I do one gym session a week normally 20 min treadmill at a fast walk, 20 min I cant remember the name of but it's arms and legs at the same time plus a mile (10 mins) on the rower.

A typical day would be like today food wise

Porridge (40g) with a tablespoon on seeds and nuts on top with chopped banana or pear or raspberry or blueberries

Milky coffee for snack.

Lunch is usually soup (today was homemade but has coconut milk in so high syn) plus I had a cheesy crumpet

Dinner is tomato pasta bake with a jar of sauce with Tuna and sweetcorn mixed through with spinach and cucumber on the side

I drink 1-2 nights a week will usually have a bottle of wine with my husband one night and a bottle of cider the other night

Usually have a bag of crisps or a bar of chocolate if I'm having an alcoholic drink

Biscuit at toddler group a few times a week

I'm on the 10 a day fruit and veg thread too but I don't get 10.a day!!

Yeah, you're not doing it properly. You need to accept it as a lifestyle change. DH and I do SW. We started just before lockdown and we're very strict and lost a lot. We're now a bit 'looser' with the plan and therefore not seeing the results we'd like. But it's our own fault. You can't eat the high syn foods and have a takeaway every week and copious amounts of alcohol and think you should be loosing weight.

@Ichangemynameagain

There is a huge difference between ditching Slimming world and giving up on losing weight entirely.

Personally I detest slimming world and everything it stands for. Some mushed up ryvita with quark and gelatine is not a cheesecake FFS.

There are plenty of other ways to lose weight that don't resort to making fake aways out of cauliflower and trying to pretend it's normal.

This is what I'm thinking, not giving up on losing weight just following a different path than slimming world, a more wholefoods approach

Slimming world promotes thinking of food as ‘sins’. They changed the spelling to ‘syns’ to try and appease the criticism they were getting for this. Healthy eating and a healthy lifestyle should not be associated with being sinful and bad. It’s the wrong way to think about how you’re fueling your body and the large majority of people who follow SW never stick to it long term. They actually sell sweets at the weekly meetings for heavens sake. Its a business who’s main focus is to encourage people to keep coming back. If it’s not working for you OP have a look around. I recommend listening to a podcast called Freedom from the diet cycle.

I think it was on Mumsnet that I first heard about Rebelfit on Facebook. He has a very interesting take on Weight Watchers and Slimming World.

@teddyclown

I think it was on Mumsnet that I first heard about Rebelfit on Facebook. He has a very interesting take on Weight Watchers and Slimming World.

Well he would, seeing as he either doesn’t know how they work or pretends he doesn’t so he can then charge people to lose weight using my fitness pal instead...

Calorie counting definitely suits some people better, but you can just use my fitness pal without paying him.