GW Advice

[wrensmum]

Hiya,
I've posted lots already and have tried numerous training techniques but I am totally inconsistent and need more detailed advice on what to do with Gradual withdrawal. As it is at the moment I put her in cot after routine and she cries, sits up, I lay her down, she gets up... and I do this over and over until she is tired. Then, at some point 5 mins - 30 mins later , 7 -20 put downs later she stays, and I sing and have a hand on her, I gradually take the hand of, she stirs, put it back on, take it off.. etc... and she drops off, but I am still singing very quietly. Its an OK bedtime but then she wakes 5 - 8 times in night and will sometimes go back easily others not. I cant find the thread that had details of gradual withdrwal on it but if someone has done it could you give some details etc... Thanks

Hi there,
We used this method when our DD was about 18 months and we had success with it.

This is how we approached it..

Normal bedtime routine, bath, stories and then a cuddle with the lights out until she got a bit sleepy then popped her in bed. For the first few nights I then sat by the bed and stroked her back. If she stood up, I waited a min or so and then lay her back down.
After a few nights of this, we just rested our hand on her back rather than stroke her. Same again with the laying back down.
After a few nights of this, I just sat next to her bed but did not touch her. Again, if she stood up, I waited a min before laying her back down. At this stage I also made sure we did not have eye-contact as it was too distracting for her.
We carried on moving further and further away until I was just sitting by the door. If she cried, I would wait as long as I could bear (about a min or two) before just going over and stroking her for a few seconds and she calmed down.

The next stage was getting out the door! I had imagined this would be horrible but in the end,I sat outside her door waiting for her to cry and she didn't!
I said I would pop back in after a min which I did and just stroked her for a second or two.

Even now, I still go back in after a few mins to check she is ok. As she was able to understand I always told her what the plan was so she had no suprises.

I hope this waffle helps - will check back if you have any questions. Best of luck! It took us a while but worth it in the end!