Will introducing a bottle of formula help 10 week old to sleep on their own? Your experiences or thoughts please.

[PreciousCargo]

Our beautiful DS is 10 weeks old and has refused to sleep in his crib or moses basket since day 1. I am not prepared to leave him to "cry it out" as believe he is far too young to understand. He is currently co-sleeping with us. We are doing everything we can to ensure this is done safely, and means we all get some sleep. He naps during the day in his rocking chair or on top of me.

We have noticed him become very cranky after 7pm, as if he is telling me he needs to sleep, so I have started to feed him quietly in the bedroom and go to sleep with him, so he gets the sleep he needs. I am bf which is going well but considering introducing a bottle of formula as his last feed, again to help us move him to his crib (I am constantly hearing ff babies sleep solidly), and so he is less dependant on the boob to fall asleep.

Will he grow out of it or are we adding fuel to the fire?

I've never used formula, but lots of people on here have done and have said it didn't help at all.

It is normal at this age to want to sleep on / with you. Most babies are unable to do any self-soothing before 3 or 4 months old.

You could try swaddling him (in something very thin in this weather) which might help him sleep somewhere apart from on you.

I'd try soothing (feeding) him off to sleep a bit before he gets grumpy if you can, so that he doesn't get overtired.

During the day you could try putting him in a sling for naps, so at least you have your hands free.

There is nothing wrong with being dependent on breastfeeding to go to sleep, unless it is causing you problems, and totally normal at this age. My 6 month old DS is fed to sleep every night; I like it because it works!

Congratulations and enjoy those cuddles while they last!

Thanks Angeldog. He doesn't seem to like a sling and we may have to try swaddling him again.

I am very conscious of him being over tired and do think he gets over stimulated by TV and DH in the evening, hence why I sit in the bedroom with him. He shreeks if I try and feed him downstairs after 7pm, even if we are being quiet.

I thought I had managed to spot when he was getting tired, so he could have regular naps, knocking ear, wimpering, losing concentration. More often than not he will nap then in his chair.

I guess seeing him overtired is the main reson I feel desperate to get him to sleep in his crib, so he can get the sleep he needs. Maybe I should just stop worrying about routines and what he "should" be doing (Sometimes there is too much information out there!)

Hi there

My 10 week old DD sounds very similar, will only nap on a warm body, and at first would not sleep in cot or moses basket. At around 5 weeks we tried swaddling again, with a swaddleme wrap, I still BF her to sleep downstairs after her bath, then once she is asleep we place her in her moses basket upstairs. So far we have had 5 weeks of good results. She typically will sleep for at least 4 hours before waking for food and has gone 7 hours once. Contrary to whats in most books etc she doesn't wake up scared/confused, she seems to get thats her bed now. If he naturally falls asleep at the boon around 7pm, I would wait til he is in a deep sleep (floppy!!) and gently move him. Having even a few evening hours to yourselves is the best!! and maybe try sling again. I have the 'closer' one and use it in the BF position, DD wimpered the first few times I put her in it, once she sees she can get boob if she wants it, she is happy, and this is where her morning nap now takes place... something I have learnt is you have to keep trying/reintroducing things to them, they are changing and developing so rapidly just because they didnt like it a few weeks ago, may be totally different now.

hope this helps, good luck x

Thanks Scarlett175, sounds like you have well and truly cracked it! I think we will try swaddling again. Whenever he goes floppy I move him over and he throws his arms up and opens his eyes and notices he isn't on me. I someties wait half an hour, then try and he stays settled for no more than 5 minutes.

I read it is best to get them to fall asleep in there, rather than placing them in there when already asleep...I think we will have to try this again, but hard when he only wants boob to soothe!

no problem at all, the swaddling will help his arms flailing so should help him stay asleep better IYSWIM.... I know exactly how you feel as although we have made progress at night, daytime is another matter as their sleep is much lighter theres no way she will sleep anywhere but on mum or in sling at the moment, but honestly night time sleep is for most different, its a much deeper sleep so he might not stir.

Yep I have read too thats its better for them to fall asleep in the basket/cot, but honestly don't know anyone who's babies actually do that at this age, so I am resigned to my method until she is a little older ;) same goes for BF to sleep and soothe... all my NCT pals BF to sleep... because it works! guess it depends if its an issue for you but I have accepted with time she will grow out of this and in the meanwhile to enjoy it...

x

My DD is 16weeks and i co-sleep and feed to sleep, like you as soon as I put her down she wakes-hence sat here with her sleeing on my lap! I would say the last 2 weeks we have progressed...could not get off bed after feeding her asleep without her waking. We have done everything to make it safe, even added lovely pink cotsides to the bed. The mor secure youre little becomes, the easier it will get. It is difficult, DD wakes 4-5 times a night....not for feeding but my boob as a dummy, but the little pickle will not take a dummy! It wont last forever, they grow up so quickly, enjoy the extra cuddles like I do.....and the sleep. Good Luck x

Thanks sjbarbs. DS is exactly the same, I wake up with him bobbing my chest, then when he has boob in his mouth, he is back to sleep without feeding! I think it is about confidence and how secure they feel. I remember the early weeks when I had to hold him constantly or he cried, I thought I would have to permanently carry him on my shoulder! (His favourite position if not being fed).

I guess I have to look past the dissaproving looks from ff mums who I know are of the opinion he is perhaps not getting enough milk, or he'd sleep a lot sounder. That is one thing I am not worried about (grin).

oops...grin

Hi, my DS2 (11 weeks) has been very similar - I think it's a personality thing! He's just started to settle down in the last week so I'd advise not thinking about formula just yet. What I have done is worked out that he can only settle to sleep if it's very very dark. For 10 weeks we could only get him to nap in a sling or on our chests in the day and evening, then he was co-sleeping at night. So one day I thought what the hell, will try him in his brother's cot with black out blind and... he went to sleep with me singing to him and holding his arms (for contact). Sometimes I rock him in the dark then put him down drowsy, but the dark is definitely the thing - am now shrouding pram and car seat too!

Can you settle him at night before you put the TV on? e.g. in shrouded Moses basket to black it out.

We also use a dummy now to settle him, which has massively helped.

And I'm still co-sleeping at night as it's so easy when bfing as just need to shuffle over to feed. Lot more relaxed with second. I don't change nappy at night now unless he poos and it makes such a difference to his ability to sleep all night.

I am going to try a dummy again.

He has started early tonight, I am in the lounge typing this, no TV, when I put him to the boob he cries, but he is lying here with his fist in his mouth. I have checked and I have plenty of milk. I am going to take him upstairs again, I think you could be right about the dark. Poor little thing, I wish I could just put him down to sleep! We will get there...

In my experience the bottle never works. They just have a lot to learn about HOW to sleep! Stick with it. You might find this article on sleep useful. It does get better but you do have to guide them as well.

PRECIOUS CARGO-I have tried every dummy on the market and got a blackout blind. Just sharing this as it does not always work and there is nothing worse than feeling disheartened when it doesnt happen....I have been there many times!! The bedtime routine helps though same time and routine every night appears to have made it a smoother ride for us both. Good luck.....DD woke 7 times last night, sure its cos of the heat, we are probably waking each other.

Thanks everyone. We are going to stick with it, I have come to the conclusion that aslong as we are all getting sleep for now and have a happy baby then I must be doing something right and should be grateful. We have moved his crib closer to the bed, and he does go for periods where he is clearly sound asleep, I just need to bite the bullet and move him over a bit more!

sjbarbs - I agree, we always wake each other with 3 in a bed!