At the end of my tether now.

[belindarose]

Please, does anyone have any ideas for me?
My 10 mo DD hasn't been a great sleeper since about 4 mo, but I've been mostly positive about it and some nights are better than others. A few weeks ago she even stopped sleeping for daytime naps (had always been great at sleeping in the pram or car). I've been using 'No Cry Sleep/ nap Solution' ideas and she now has a really good morning nap, in her cot, and the same in the afternoon if we're in, or in the pram/ car if out.
The current problems are getting to sleep at night (won't/ can't feed to sleep anymore so comes off before she's really sleepy) - it can take up to an hour after she's in her cot to fall asleep. During this time she repeatedly stands up in the cot, wanting to play but crying if I leave the room. When I pick her up she sometimes relaxes, but usually wants to play with my hair or face, or look round the room in the semi-dark. Eventually she is relaxed enough again to go in her cot and I wait with her till she falls asleep. If I leave, she gets up again.
This is then repeated during the night, if she doesn't fall asleep while feeding. But it goes on for longer, probably because I don't have the energy to try so hard. I usually end up taking her to the spare bed so I can at least lie down, but the for last two nights she's then played on the bed (with nothing, I might add!) for 2 hours before falling asleep. That's after an hour of me trying in her room.
Sorry this is so incoherent. I'm not functioning too well this morning!
Please help!!

bump please

Is the standing thing relatively new, br? If so, she could be wired about practising her new skill, in which case it should (hopefully) settle down after a few weeks.

You could maybe try rapid return, if you haven't already.

Poor you, good luck.

I have great sympathy but no advice as we're going through exactly the same thing at the moment - ds2 will sleep happily for 2 hours in the day in his cot or pram but is a nightmare at night and will currently only go back to sleep if I feed him.

I've just started back at work so I'm putting it down to a combination of that and developmental stuff, and praying it won't last 2 long as I am currently a zombie and starting to get really fed up with it.

Hope it helps to know you're not the only one and I'll be watching with interest to see if you get any good advice!

Thank you for your sympathy. I was feeling sorry for myself yesterday! Yes, the standing is quite new and she definitely seems compelled to do it at night. Last night we only had one waking, after I'd had a nice 5 hour sleep spell, so I felt much better about it. I noticed that even when she was really trying to go to sleep, she'd roll over onto her tummy to get comfortable but then her body seemed to stand up without her wanting to!
IC - could you briefly explain rapid return? I think it's what I do sometimes anyway.
MD - Much sympathy as you're back at work. I definitely wouldn't be coping with that! But wish DD would feed to sleep again!

belinda - both your posts are creeping me out because it's like you've entered my brain and are writing out E.X.A.C.T.L.Y what my DS is doing at the mo!! Especially the bit about rolling onto tummy to sleep but the body taking over and sitting/standing up.

Sadly I can't offer much advice only great sympathy as I'm still going through this after about 3 weeks. I've taken to co-sleeping for most of the night and doing whatever it takes to get him to go back to sleep - feeding, cuddling, music, stroking - just to get him back into a sensible pattern... Last couple of nights we've had less 'wide awake and playing' and more 'obviously sleepy and wanting to sleep but body moving all over the place'... I'm hoping this is the start and he'll then move back to 'sleeping'

I've had a TON of support on my thread here if you want to read through for nuggets of advice:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/sleep/990933-8mo-waking-for-a-couple-of-hours-in-the-night

I'll look at your thread, tweet. In fact, I've probably posted on it. Sorry for freaking you out! Co-sleeping isn't working for us - she thinks it's great fun and a new opportunity to play. The other night, she was even finding both my hands, putting them together and making me clap, while I was pretending to sleep. Last night was only an hour of being awake, and we'd gone to bed early so DH was happy to do a bit and got her to sleep. I felt much more sympathetic to her last night, after realising that she just needs lots of help to sleep at the moment and isn't actually TRYING to upset me!!

Oh yes, I remember your thread. This is a description of me:

'I am running on empty and most of the day am extremely tired, irritable and angry. I find it very hard to interact with my DS/talk to him and find myself operating in silence and up leaving him (supervised) to play with himself'

We can't be the same person as mine is a girl. That's just how I've felt this week and I felt terrible about it. Much better today, after only a bit more sleep really, but it's definitely the sleep deprivation that does it.

Hi again br

I'm no expert, but as I understand it, with rapid return you put the LO to sleep and leave the room/cot area. You go back in to briefly reassure and resettle and repeat the process as soon as you hear any crying or sounds of distress. It's basically a step back from CC in that the baby is never left to cry, but each time you make the baby comfortable and go again... etc. To start with, you have to keep going back, but theoretically that will become less as the baby gets the message that you aren't staying.

I think! I'm open to correction by anyone who knows exactly how it's done...

HTH

It's amazing how just an extra hour or two of sleep can make all the difference to your day... I hope it gets better for you soon - looks like you're making some progress with shorter awake periods which is a start at least!

Went downhill again last night - 3 1/2 hours awake, which is more than she can usually manage in the daytime!! How was your night, Tweet?

Oh I'm sorry to hear that belinda sleep here has been better in that there has only been one wide awake stint (last night actually), but he's taken to waking many times now and will only settle with me This I can cope with though, as at least he'll sleep next to me so we both just nod back off... I've also noticed that he's started waking up later again (between 6/7 instead of 5!) so some improvement there too.

Hi there,
I am by no means an expert at getting babies to sleep but I was in a similar position to you not that long ago. We went with a gradual withdrawal type thing.

To start with we did the normal calm bedtime routine - bath, books, milk... I would then give her a cuddle in the dark for a while until I could feel her relax then I would pop her in bed and sit next to the cot stroking her back until she was asleep.

After a few days of this, I would just keep my hand on her back until she was asleep.

Then I would just sit next to her... then a little bit away from the cot... then near the door etc etc.

If she stood up, I would give it a minute or so and then just gently lie her back down with no conversation.

It took a long time and she did, at times, get cross but I was always there so I knew she was ok.

Hope this is of some help!

Hi ladies.I just posted a new thread but this sounds v similar!Boo hiss.could I be devlopmental?only difference is Dd is showing zeo interest in crawling!

HELP!!

Thanks for your ideas, bubbles. I've thought about the gradual withdrawal thing, having read NCSS and 'Sleep sense', both of which cover it. But there's no way on earth that DD would fall asleep with me stroking her or patting her.
We've had two okay nights - DH and I planned to do half hour shifts on Saturday night, but only needed one each, so that was good. Last night she woke and fell asleep straight after a feed. Up at 5.30 though, and nothing would convince her it was still night time! Better though!