DD is 18weeks and takes forever to settle to sleep at night. Once she is down at the minute she goes a minimum 5hours but lately it has been 8hours which has been great- usually waking at 4am for a feed or 5am at latest. So the sleep part is okay- it's the getting to sleep that's the issue!
We try to put her to bed between 7-8 but she often fights it until 10pm. Her daytime naps are starting to get better so on a good day she has about half an hour at 9am-ish (only in her swing or bouncer) then 3 hours around midday (waking between 2-3pm) (usually in pram or baby hammock). Then she probably needs another short nap before bed but often doesn't manage this unless she has a 20minute snooze on the boob. (Naps have never been managed in the cot!)
Should we be trying for a more rigid naptime and bedtime? (Trouble is DH doesn't get home from work until 6 and I like to hand her over at that point- cept DH also cooks, so we usually try to eat before she sleeps (as it can take so long- which means he isn't available to help with the bedtime routine and by that point in the day I am knackered and don't want to do all the putting to bed stuff too!)
Our current routine is usually bath (most nights,sometimes baby massage too), nighttime nappy and clean babygro and into grobag. 7oz Bottle of formula and cuddles on comfy chair in bedroom while playing her lullabye dreamshow which she usually falls asleep during- then you try and move her to her bedside cot, then she wakes up so give her rest of bottle in her cot, then she starts wriggling and screaming (so check for wind- usually it isn't). I lie next to her (as cot on side of bed) and shh pat but it doesn't work, we also often sing to her. So in end I often end up breastfeeding her to sleep in bed(despite knowing she isn't hungry) but the moving her back to her side of cot wakes her up again (I have tried precariously balancing in cot feeding her but it's a bit dangerous- don't think it was designed for the weight of mum too!) Rocking the cot sometimes works as does kind of lying with my arms across her holding her arms down.
How can we get this 3hour bedtime "routine" time down to ideally half an hour but will accept an hour (from start of bath!).
Perhaps our routine changes too much after the bottle? as in sometimes shh pat, sometimes singing, cot rocking, breastfeeding? pick up put down in rotation until she eventually falls asleep.
Do we need to work on the last nap of the day? I suspect she needs another 30mins at least between 4.30 and 5.30 but it doesn't always work and sometimes if her earlier nap has gone squiffy then she has a big nap- 4-7 which means obviously no hope of getting her back to bed until 9.
What should we sort first- daytime naps or bedtime, and then will the other follow?
Cor long post sorry!