5 month old never naps

[GoldenSnitch]

My almost 5 months old DD never naps. She never really has since she was born!!

When DS was her age, he would have a couple of longish naps every day plus 10-12 hours straight through at night (yes, I know I was very lucky) but DD doesn't seem to nap at all.

She will doze in my arms during a feed and sometimes have 10 minutes on Daddy when he gets home but she will not nap for any length of time unless we are out and she is in the buggy or car seat and even that's not guaranteed.

She doesn't even sleep through the night to make up for it. She goes down at about 7-7.30 after bathtime. She used to sleep until about midnight but recently she's been getting up at 8.30-9pm too. She feeds then goes straight back to sleep at these times. She then wakes at about 5am for another feed and is wide awake. And that's it. Apart from short cat naps of never more than about 30 mins, she is wide awake for the whole day then!!

I know things are noiser than when DS was a baby - 3 years olds are not the quietest of things - and I've stopped putting in her moses basket in the lounge to sleep, but she won't sleep in her crib in my room either. I can sometimes get her to have half an hour if I lay her on my bed but that's not often. Most usually, it's about 10 mins.

Now I always joked that I was due a nightmare sleeper this time after DS was such a good sleeper and I know she does OK at night time but I'm actually beginning to worry about her development if she doesn't start getting a bit more sleep. Babies are supposed to need much more sleep that she is getting.

I'm wondering if I need to start "enforcing" some naps? Feed and change her, have a little play and then put her down in a dark room at a certain time everyday and either leave her to cry or rock her and hope she feels asleep eventually.

Help!!!

No-one?

She just fell asleep while feeding. I took her upstairs and she started howling the second I put her down!!

Me too!

Does your DD get grouchy and over tired if she doesn't nap/catnaps? If not, she might be one of the few that don't need as much sleep as other babies.

My DD does need the sleep (gets very grouchy and spends most of the day being grumpy if she misses naps) but she fights it so much I find it horrendously challenging (she is currently shouting away in her cot).

I have been trying to stick to nap schedule but becasue she is so random in her nighttime sleep and wake up times, I try to stick to 2 hours awake rather than a specific time. I then have a little nap time routine - just sing the same song as we walk to the nursery, close the curtains, say bye, bye to her animals and then put her down in her cot. I tell her its naptime, give her a kiss and leave the room. On a good day she will settle herself after 5-10 min shouting, on a bad day (like today) the shouting will turn to crying, at which point I get her up (she's now being a grumpus on my knee rather than in her cot). Sometimes she will settle and go back in her cot but most times I have to resort to the pram or car to get her off or she snoozes on the boob.

Either way, she only manages 40 mins at most (used to be 20, then 30 so is improving). She has 3 to 4 naps a day.

Feel free to join our support thread here. Most of our DC are approaching the 4/5 month mark now; my DD is 5 mo tomorrow.

HTH

Thanks PDog. I left her to cry it out earlier and she fell asleep within 10 mins and stayed that way for 45 mins.

She does get grouchy so I think she does need the sleep, she just wants to be held.

Will check out the support thread, thanks

Try a sling? (You might not want to if she's a big baby, though!)

Does she show any tired signs? Starting to try soothe to sleep about an hour and a half to two hours after waking can work well for babies who don't show tired signs.

My DS will only sleep after feeding, in the pram or in the car if it's at the moment when he's naturally tired and his body is wanting to sleep. Any other time and none of those things will even make him drowsy.

If feeding or rocking her works, you might need to hold onto her until she's deeply asleep at first until she gets the hang of having a sleep in the day. Then you might be able to put her down drowsy rather than asleep. Or letting her cry once you've soothed her to sleep may well work.

You may find that if you can get her to nap in the day, her night time sleep improves too.

She's a teeny baby (she's trailing just under the 2nd precentile line) and we have a Mobywrap but I find it impossible to get anything done with her strapped to me.

She doesn't show many tired signs usually and does like to fall asleep while feeding but she immediately wakes as soon as I put her down. Even if I carry on holding her, she doesn't sleep for very long and will be awake again within about 10 minutes.

She dropped off during a feed today and woke as soon as I put her in her crib so I soothed her a little and then left her to cry. She was asleep within about 5 minutes and then slept for 45 minutes which is amazing for her!

I just hate leaving her to cry

It is hard but does get easier. If my DD is overtired, I have to hold her down in the cot while she cries. It sounds awful and makes me feel like crap but she will eventually go to sleep and is much happier when she does.

She also does not like to be moved if she falls asleep while feeding so if I think she is sleepy, I will use a cushion so I don't have to hold her and then take the opportunity to have a rest/catch up on TV/read while she sleeps - understand that you probably can't do this with a 3yo to look after as well though.

I fed her this morning then tucked her up in the pushchair while we took DS to pre school this morning and she fell asleep on the way. I brought the buggy inside and stripped won some of the layers and have left her asleep in the kitchen.

She woke up after 15 minutes

She woke up just before 5am this morning and I fed her. She wasn't interested at the 8am pre school run which is probably why she's awake now.

I'm going to try feeding every 3 hours today and encourage her to nap at least morning and afternoon. Will see how it goes...

Fed her and she fell asleep. She's been napping for almost half an hour now!!

Does help that the house is quiet as DS is at pre school

Hooray!

Apparently the easiest nap for babies to fall asleep for is the first one of the day - sounds daft, but it's supposed to be easiest for them to fall asleep when they're well rested from the night. Certainly the first nap of the day is the only nap for which DS has ever managed to fall asleep on his own.

I find that coming in from outdoors in the pushchair will often wake DS up - DH or I have been known to sit on the front doorstep with him until he wakes up!

She managed half an hour. That's fab for her.

45 minutes sleep all together so far today. Now for some playtime to tire her out for the next nap

My DS was just like that. Never really slept during the day even as a newborn. Perky perky.

At 5 months I started to go back to work and my MiL looked after him a lot during the day. She "enforced" naps, mostly by rocking him (astonishingly vigorously) in the pram until he went off. He had one nap of about 45 mins or an hour everyday after lunch.

Then at 9 months we got a nanny, who managed to make him nap without the rocking. I think she used a combination of firmness, routine, and letting him cry a bit.

But I was never very successful at getting him to nap on my days off or weekends. He knew I was a soft touch, I think. Likewise DH. We finally gave up at 20 months after we had walked for an hour, both DH and I with high temperatures, with DS lying in his pram shouting "Ma NO sleeeep!" at 5 min intervals.

And actually, we found that removing the nap dramatically improved his night sleeping, which had been dreadful. He was never tired and miserable in the later part of the day - he's just not a child who needs that much daytime sleeping (I wasn't either). Now at 3yrs he does 4 full days at preschool with full chirpiness until bedtime. So I'm not sure how rigorously I would impose the daytime nap next time, if had another wakeful one.

Actually, another random thought - he sleeps better now at night and seems more obviously tired in the evening and I think that's to do with physical activity. On days when he gets to run about a lot he's much tireder. I've wondered if he just wasn't able to get the kind of exercise he needed as a baby to make him really tired. So reckon you're definitely right to try some good bouncy playtime to tire DD out.

Good luck!