Noisy sleeper - why and what to do?

[Emmie412]

I am a mum of a 3 week old baby girl and we're having some issues with feeding and sleeping. Not sure which topic this should be under so hopefully someone will pick it up from here....

We have a few issues that are also starting to feed my existing anxiety and stress, creating a vicious circle...

My baby does not seem to be able to sleep silently during the night. She seems to make squirrel sounds, gurgle, scream, wave about etc which I have taken as signs of being hungry and gotten up to feed her - but I am beginning to think that she is actually sleeping but just not very restfully. These sounds go on for hours before she is actually awake and I am there checking on her, and often getting the clues wrong, and she then falls asleep on me half way through the messy feed (breastfeeding issues). Settling her after night feed takes ages and invariably ends up being put down-pick up exercise to no end. Followed by waving about, posseting etc to the point of us wanting scream... we're wearing ear plugs already but can hear her through them. Is this normal??? She sleeps well in her buggy/pram during the day without any major stirring. In the evenings she is often restless and it is guaranteed that if it is dinner time and I'm trying to eat etc, she will be awake and want to be held/fed. Also as soon as we put her in her basket once she has fallen asleep on us she wakes up and screams.

Sorry if this does not make any sense but I'm coming to my wits end - what can we do to solve this issue? I'm also thinking of giving up breastfeeding as it is causing me major stress/anxiety/feeling of inadequacy - been helped by midwives etc to no end with latching but still not getting it right, meaning that both mum and baby cry through feeds...

I had two noisy sleepers. Constant gurgling, snoring, screeching, shuffling, all in their sleep and especially in the hours between midnight and 6am. It stopped around 3-4 months I think. DH was lucky as he could sleep through it, so my solution was that I left dd with him and went to sleep downstairs on the sofa bed after the first night feed. That way I didn't hear the shuffling any more but did hear her crying when they woke up for milk.

You should be able to tell though when she's genuinely awake and hungry - expect a feed every 2.5-4 hrs at this age. Just don't pick her up every time she gurgles, wait until you're certain she's looking for food. Mine always started snuffling / rooting around. and then proper crying if I didn't respond. All the best!

Oh BTW it can be trapped wind - make sure you wind her properly and maybe when you put her down, try rubbing her tummy in a circular motion, this helped my dd2.

I am having exactly the same issue with my 3 week old, and was wondering if this was normal. She seems so noisy that I think she must be awake, and like you I can't sleep through it and am getting very anxious. I can completely sympathise. My husband fortunately can sleep through it and wants me to sleep somewhere else so I can get some sleep, but I feel really bad about doing this! I am so glad to hear that I am not alone.

it is normal! both dd1 and 2 were very noisy sleepers when tiny. Lots of wriggling too. This was generally from midnight or so onwards-they would be fairly peaceful before then.

with dd2 I got earplugs-those waxy ones you can push right in. (They're called Bio Ears I think). Also dh was sleeping downstairs at this point and sometimes he would keep her down there after her feed at around 10.30 -11ish and bring her back up to me when she woke up properly ( he just slept through all the other noises)

Keep night feeds as calm and quiet as you can-best if you can do it in the dark lying down, hopefully she will settle down quicker. Only feed if she's actually crying for it.

I have a noisy sleeper too! He grunts and shouts really loudly, but is asleep. I was worried he might be uncomfortable (sounds like a constipated person straining to poo, but often I will hear him fart or poo, so it isn't that!) HV says not to worry as if he is in discomfort he will wake and cry.

I have tried ear plugs but they don't really help. DH is sleeping in the spare room. Pillow over my own head is somewhat effective, but a bit hot under there!

I'm hoping that DS (now 8 weeks) will get less noisy, as I posted a thread on here and a couple of people said their DCs stopped around 3 months.

I do end up on red alert for a lot of the night, listening out for a change in pitch, snuffling sounds and grizzling, which means he's getting hungry, and if I leave him he will wake and cry. I pick him up at the grizzle stage (aided by clock watching - I try to stretch to 2.5-3 hours between feeds) then feed him and put him back down and he stays asleep. If he gets to he wake stage he is harder to get back to sleep.

Oh forgot to say - I feed sitting propped up in bed, in the (nearly) dark (door half open, hall light on to give enough light to see by) - but initially I had a reading light which I pointed up at the wall, so it was still as dark as possible, but I could see well enough to check DS had latched on properly. (now he can latch himself on fine and I don't need to see)

When he is done DS just takes himself off - he makes a little noise and lifts his head off, although he is asleep. I then lie him on my chest for a couple of minutes and gently rub his back to wind him, and carefully put him back into bed still asleep.

I don't try to make him take more that he takes, and sometimes he stays on for 15 mins, sometimes 5mins. I also swaddle him at bedtime, and keep him swaddled when I feed him, or he wakes himself up with flailing arms.

Does everyone have their baby in the same room as them at night?
I had my dd in the room with us for one night only- she was so noisy she went into her room on day 2. She's right on the other side of the wall but it blocks the noise (both ways!) enough for us all to sleep, but she's close enough that she has always woken me up when she cries for a feed. I have a v comfy chair in there so it's v comfy to feed her. If you're already wearing ear plugs, why not put the baby in its own room? I know it's against HV advice but it made all the difference for us and my dd is now 11 months and happy and healthy.

ps emma, try to stick it out with the breast feeding, it gets easier every single day and will get better soon.