7pm bedtime - the right time?

[musicmaiden]

Hi
Was just wondering whether everyone thinks 7pm is THE bedtime to go for with babies and where that arbitary time comes from!

My 5-month DS never seems tired at that time and seems to settle about 8.30-9 naturally despite me making sure he doesn't nap after 5. I thought this was fine until all my mother friends said their babies went down at 7 or 7.30!

Should I work towards a 7pm bedtime or is it ok to have baby go to bed whenever they have finally finished on the boob are getting tired?

8:30 or 9:00 sounds fine, if it's working for you!

I think the 7:00/7:30 thing comes from when babies need to be up for nursery/school. So if they need 11-12 hours at night, and they have to be up by 6:30 or 7:00 to get to nursery then you work backwards from there.

It seems like the babies who happily feed all evening and then go to bed later do their long stretch of sleep when you want to sleep, which is better for everyone.

Unfortunately by DS was always knackered and screamy by about 5 or 6 pm, so he's always had an early bedtime. He does his best stretch of sleep in the evening and then the antics start after midnight.

Would much rather have your timing, but I just could never make it work for my DS.

I meant "Unfortunately MY DS...", of course. Oops.

Go with what works for you - I wish I hadn't tried to fit in to other people's ideals. If your DS isn't tired you're going to end up having a battle with him and he's going to lie in his cot crying.

I think the 7pm bedtime thing only really comes into it's own when they start school and have to be up at 7am. If you've got a routine that works for you and your baby and all is well - don't fix what ain't broke!

My DD goes to sleep at about 6pm and I have had comments about how 'strict' I am, but it's the time she naturally starts to melt down and I know that if I keep her up any later, she won't cope with it.

You know best.

7pm bedtime works for me cuz then I can breathe a sigh of relief and see Corrie and EE!! 7pm is also a magic time, means they sleeps longer - didn't you know? Tis a miracle honest... MN secret etc...

Having said that, DD1 actually went to bed at 8pm and was fine.

My 13 month son goes to bed at 7pm because he is up at 6am the next day to get ready for the childminder, he is up in the night as well so any later and he is very grumpy. I'd actually rather have him go to bed later so I can spend more time with him in the evening (and for him to sleep through). Does your child sleep well? If so change NOTHING. Ignore whatever anyone else says unless you're unhappy with the situation.

At 5 months my DS was still having an evening sleep in his Moses basket in the living room, then waking about 10 and being moved upstairs then. If we tried anything different it was hard to settle him before about 8.30.

After about 7/8 months, though, we started a much more formulaic bedtime routine with the aim of getting him upstairs and into bed earlier. This has worked pretty well and he now goes to bed at 7-7.30 or maybe up to 8 on occasion, sleeping through till 7am. But he didn't seem ready for it earlier. I know some of my NCT friends did get into this kind of routine earlier but my experience was that my DS didn't take to it till a little older, having solids, and taking milk less often. So I wouldn't worry just yet - but if you are going back to work, it does then help to get an earlier bedtime in place, I think. But you may well find that things just shift naturally on their own.

At 5 months dd was going to bed at 10 - she fed solidly from 5pm til 10. At 5 mo it's entirely what suits you and the baby - later you may want to change it according to what you are doing, but it's not the law.

At 5 months I was putting DD to bed at 7pm because I knew that 5 or 6 months later I would be returning to work so would need her to be awake at 6.30am each morning - so I wanted to get her used to a 7pm bedtime from birth.

We used to wake her (or she used to wake) around 10.30pm for a last feed and then back to sleep till morning.

The 7pm bedtime worked for us because of the need to start our day at 6.30am or 7am. So if your LO doesn't need to wake that early then stick with what you're doing :-)

I think it depends on the child. But I also agree with 'puppy monkey' if you've been on your own with two babies for 10-12 hours (both you and they need a break). 7pm bedtime as a baby worked great for us and my DS and he has always been a good sleeper and thrived on routine, but younger DD had her own ideas. They both went to bed around 7 as babies. He was asleep in seconds whereas as she cried initially then sang to herself. she is 6 now and goes to bed at 8pm unless it's a weekend and still sings and plays in her room till quite late. Whereas, my little boy goes to bed the same time as her and still goes to sleep very quickly after going in his bedroom but he gets up early regardless when he goes to bed, whereas DD likes a lie in and I have to wake her for school nearly every day.

While my DS was cluster feeding all evening, he went to bed at about 9.30pm. Now he's stopped cluster feeding he goes to bed at about 7-8pm. However if he's up late one day he'll go to bed a bit later, we don't have a set bedtime as such.

Until about 9 months DS just stayed downstairs, dozing/feeding until we went to bed at 11ish. If he goes to bed too early I find he wakes really early because he's hungry. Just do what suits you :) You can always make changes gradually later if it's no longer working for you.

Boy is in bed by 7pm at 7.5mo because he just crashes by 6.30 latest and its not viable to go any later. He's up at 7 as DH goes in and changes his nappy then before bringing him to me to feed so I suppose it just fell that way really. I don't mind, it means that we eat around 8pm instead of 6pm but I also get a longer evening to relax.