21 weeks, broken nights and up for the day at 4am...

[sazza1970]

Hi all

I know there have been lots of posts on this, but I just wondered if anyone had specific advice for my situation.

My four and half month old baby had been doing brilliantly with sleeping (once I'd introduced a bottle of formula at 7 - my supply seemed low in the evening and it certainly seemed to help her settle more easily). Until four weeks ago, she was sleeping from 7 til 3, quick feed and then straight back down til 7. But this has all changed! Now she's distracted while bfing in the day, snacking and I suspect not getting enough, waking at night three or four times (but not needing a full feed at all of these and in fact pulls of the boob) and then wakes at 4ish ready to start the day. After we attempt to feed her, and pull out all the go-to-sleep stops (dancing, jigging, etc) after about an hour and a half she'll fall asleep only to wake up 40 mins later ready for the up.

Is this a feeding issue? SHe's a really big baby - 18lbs - and I wonder if solids or baby rice at bedtime would help. Any tips on how to resolve this - particularly the gruelling 4am wake up - would be very very welcome!

I'm no expert but think that maybe 7pm is too early for her to go to sleep?

Re her waking up in the night... are you sure she is not hungry? Does she go on the boob at all and if she does, does she swallow lots of air? Asking this cause I had the experience with my DS where I was giving him a bottle 1-2 times a day for a few weeks and then noticed he was becomming restless on the breast. Would pull off repeatedly, swallow lots of air. He was also having quite a bad wind which he never suffered from before. I figure all that was happening because I was giving him a bottle... He seemed to have unlearned how to latch on and suck properly hence lots of swallowed air and wind. I stopped the bottles and now, after 2 weeks he is back to his normal happy self.

I would think your DD is hungry when she wakes up in the night (esp cause she's a big baby) - if the breastfeeding is not happening have you tried giving her a bottle? Try burping her before the feed - she might be restless because she needs a burp (I know a bit strange burping them before the feed but my DS does that and it calms him down if he's restless) IWonder whether she'd still wake up at 4am if she had a good feed in the night.

I would not give her solids, a bit too young in my opinion... She needs food but your milk and formula should be enough, have you tried expressing for few days to increase your supply?

Starting the day at 4am must be a torture, hope something will work for you in the end.

Her being a big baby is no more than an indication that she is THRIVING on breastmilk alone. Please don't try and shovel food into her because (1) it is a myth that food helps them sleep, (2) her gut is not mature enough for them yet, (3) the combination of not being ready for solids and food at night could result in belly ache and her being more unsettled at night and (4) if she is hungry, because weaning is a very slow and gradual process in which their gut first gets accustomed to food and then slowly starts being able to digest it, initially solids just fill them up, taking up room that would've been filled with USABLE calories like milk. (Again leading to more unsettled nights.)

Your supply being "low" was probably you mistaking cluster feeding for lack of supply. Babies cluster feed in the evening to get lots of hind milk to help them sleep longer. Hind milk has a very high cream content and is full of calories. Cluster feeding through a growth spurt (2 months, 4 months, 6 months are long growth spurts) is also to increase supply.

Distractedness at 4 months is very common, and a less common but rather frustrating response can be to reverse cycle. At this age, they are beginning to get mobile and can see a lot further and a lot more clearly. With a bigger world, and the dawning of mobility, plus increasing coordination, not least hand-to-mouth coordination and the start of the oral fixation stage (exploring with the mouth, not readiness for solids), they want to explore all day and not waste time with nursing. It's best to nurse when they're sleepy (before/after naps), in a quiet, darkened room, and with something to occupy them. I introduced a lovey that was fluffy on one side and silky on the other. Some women swear by nursing necklaces. Others find that their babies start playing with their nipples/hair/glasses/etc.

With the 4am wake-up, I would make sure to change the nappy (probably v. wet after a night of feeding) and give a feed and have a cuddle in bed together. Good luck.