Sleeping on front - advice needed

[kaz33]

DS2 is less than two days old. He hates lying on his back - last night he would only sleep if he laid on one of us. So as you can imagine we are a little fractious this morning. He appears to have very bad wind, lots of whining and pulling his legs up to his chest. Obviously being on his front helps relieve it.

I know the standard advice on cot death - I am intending to put him in a newborn gro-bag from birth. How much more dangerous is this ? We need some sleep.

DD used to do this. HV told us to turn her over when ever we say her on her front. Grobag didn't really solve it either though.

You can get a device for stopping the rolling over. I have seen it in John Lewis and also in some of the bay catalogues like PHP (have a website called baby catalogue I think). It is like two mini bolster cushions connected by a peice of material. You lay baby between the cushions and it should stop him rolling over. I haven't used one so don't know how good they are - didn't see them when DD was tiny.

I can sympathise with this kaz. DS was a very poor sleeper and windy until he went onto his front at four months old. Obviously this is still an age where cot death is an issue but we followed all the other advice (ie slept with us until 6 months, cellular blankets, no cot bumpers, smoke-free zone, foot to foot in cot - although at a few days old could contrive a 180 turn) but I still felt a little guilty. So I'm sorry no help here but I certainly do understand. I hope somebody can be a bit more factual for you.

He's not rolling over is he?

Fwiw, mine all slept on their sides - would this be any help? It doesn't seem to be such a no-no as sleeping on tummy. I would discuss with midwife or internet search - see what the relative risks are.

Also, I used to feed in bed, lying down, baby obviously also lying down. They never got wind when fed in this position. Just drifted off to sleep. Getting them back in their cots again was another matter ....

Maybe he doesn't feel secure on his back? You could try swaddling him firmly, to see if the support/pressure from that comforts him.

I swaddled all mine - first was born in New York and they are dead keen on swaddling there, it needs to be a woven cotton sheet/blanket to hold them firmly, not a knitted one, and it does seem to keep them calmer for the first few weeks - no startling. They slept on their sides swaddled.

Having said that, except for 4th (born 1993) they all subsequently slept on their fronts, as recommended in the dark ages; not only that, 3rd and 4th both had lambskin fleeces (though 4th slept on his back on his).

But kaz, he is very tiny, I can imagine how exhausted you are but it won't last long, could you take it in turns to be the one he lies on until he grows up a little? That way one of you would get some sleep.

Congratulations and good luck!

I used to put DS1 & 2 to sleep on their sides - it just seemed more comfy after a feed. They had always rolled onto their backs by the time the next feed came along though. I also used one of those "Guardian Angel" bolster thingys although with a chubby baby, there really wasn't much room in the basket for them. DS2 seemed to like the snug feeling.

Oh dear - I wasn't very clear - he will only sleep if on front. Otherwise he just wakes up screaming from trapped wind. Thanks for the thoughts on swaddling, but i could never get the hang of it with DS1 and he just used to wake up unswaddled and cold.

Last night I put him in his gro bag on his front ( in his cot next to the bed ) and he slept like a dream. Only woke up at 2.30am for a half hour feed. Then didn't get up till 8am.

Feeling a bit more rational today - better do some research - but it sounds from what you say that it really is that dangerous to sleep on front.

I will have another go on his back. I am implementing a super winding programme and taking real care with my diet to see if that makes any difference.

I had a friend who also had to put her DS on his front... there was no other way.
OK - it is recommended to put them on their back but it doesn't mean he'll die on his front ! One of the danger of babies on their front is if they vomit I think.... provided you pay attention... I am sure he'll be fine.Enjoy Canmeron

does raising the cot help at all? we had ours raised absolutely loads for the first 2 months and it seemed to help

Kaz33, my ds would only sleep on his front. We battled for 8 weeks to force him on to his back as he was our first and we were convinced he would die if he was on his front and it was a long sleepless, miserable 8 weeks for everyone. Definitely talk to your HV or doctor but in the end after long consultations we let ds sleep on his front. Tummy sleeping is only one of the indicators in cot death. We were told that if you have a healthy, full-term baby with no sleep apnea (not sure I've spelt that correctly) that sleeps in a well ventilated room on a proper cot mattress with no smokers in the house then the risks of SIDS are very significantly reduced anyway.
We did find that while we were still battling in the first 8 weeks, very tight swaddling helped but ds was a winter baby and I don't know how well swaddling would work in the summer heat.
DS is now 3.5 yrs old and still falls asleep on his tummy!

Agree with Bugsy here. My first 2 babies slept on their front - used to be recommended. Then the awareness raising of risk factors in cotdeath were identified. Numbers of cotdeaths went down with the 'back to sleep' campaign. However, that was just one risk factor. I certainly put mt last 2 babies down on their sides or back and not on their fronts. Luckily for me they settled fine.
My sister had a huge problem with her last baby who would nly settle on her front. The main problem associated with tummy sleeping is overheating. I would not swaddle a baby who slept on it's tummy for that reason. My sister was told the same as Bugsy, as well as the fact the baby was breastfed, the risk was minimal. HTH.

How interesting to see this thread as I am currently agonizing over this issue! DD2 is now 10 wks old and the only way to reliably get her off in the daytime is to put her down on her tummy. Like her big sister, she has suffered from terrible wind and a colicky tummy, and sleeping on her front seems to help.

My doula (an ex-maternity nurse) says that for years and years people put babies on their fronts to sleep simply because most of them prefer it and sleep longer that way. At the moment I compromise. I always try to put DD2 on her back but after 3 failed attempts I put her down in her moses basket on her front. She always sleeps on her back at night and doesn't seem to mind it then.

The main drawback is that I'm too scared to leave her alone while she's sleeping on her front so if she's in that position it rules out a daytime sleep for me or even just an hour on the computer responding to emails or logging on to mumsnet!

I know that cot deaths dropped dramatically when babies were put to sleep on their fronts, but also don't forget that we are living proof that sleeping babies on their tummies isn't always dangerous.

It's interesting because since I started putting DD2 on her tummy and asking others about it a surprising number of people are coming out of the woodwork and admitting they slept their babies on their tums. My sister slept all 3 of her kids on her tummy because she says otherwise she wouldn't have got any sleep for 5yrs!

I need some advice please. I am new mum of a four month old little girl. The trouble is she will only sleep on her front. I have tried swaddling, sleeping bags and soothers, but all she does is wake herself up. i slept her on her front one afternoon and now she will not go back to sleeping on her back. She holds her head up well and can almost roll over, but i am so worried at night that i wake every hour to check she is breathing. Can anyone advice as to whether she is safe to sleep on her front or how i can get her to sleep soundly on her back.

My two eldest dc slept on their fronts or side as was advised then. My last child couln't settle on her back at all. After 72 hours of no sleep for either her or me i put her on her front on my t-shirt and she slept like a dream. The midwives were not at all happy, but i said i had made an informed decision, that if she slept better on her front then that's what it would be. I kept trying her on her back, but tbh by the time she was rolling over she always rolled over to her front. I think the guide lines are a guide. Be practical, we had no family near to help out so it was left to us, now she is a healthy four year old. Do what works for you and don't feel guilty.

Lau, Mears is a midwife and usually gives very good advice. See her message below, it should reassure you.

we had exactly the same problem with our little one, he is now 16months but from the day we took him home we couldnt get him to sleep on his back and neither of us got any sleep, so we let him sleep on his front and he loved it but i was really scared as everyone said no dont let him do that, we continued to let him sleep on his front but i watched him like a hawk and still didnt get much sleep! when he was a few months he slept on his side sometimes. He used to pull his leg ups to his tummy and when feeding he used to pull the bottle so hard to his mouth, we put him on omneo comfort by cow and gate which is a thicker milk and helped with the colic but my health visitor though he could have had baby heartburn. Some people say that elavating them helps so they dont lie flat, put something under the mattress. It did improve when he reached 3 months, you have to do whats best for you and what your happy with :-)

my baby is only 7 weeks old and will sleep on back though much prefers front but i think you should trust your own instincts, esp for your own sanity to get some sleep. If it's what they prefer it must be natural, surely?