locked in room

[makemineaginandtonic]

Instead of having a nice relaxing evening, I am once again having a battle of the wits with my two awful daughters (4 and 2). They refuse to go to bed, stay in bed, or go to sleep and shout poo head at me every time I return them silently to bed. I feel very resentful that I am STILL on duty after getting up at 6.15 and see no reason why they shouldn't be tired and go to sleep. I am truly truly sick of them.

keep putting them back

it will work

baby gate??

My 3yo has been like this this week deliberately screaming and shouting to wake my 6mo up...

It is very wearing, especially when there are things I really need to get done in the evening.

Rapid return, and ignore, ignore, ignore- they're doing it for attention. I don't get angry any more as she is just trying to get a rise from me- she usually gets fed up after 10 minutes or so.

You have my sympathy though.

I'd second the baby gate - worked a treat with dd and gave me some space to just be able to walk away from it all and know she'd be safe.

Rapid return fed my dd's attention seeking in this instance.

Its horrible when you're in the middle of it - it will pass - it drove me to the point of literally wanting to run out of the door so I really feel for you.

I am still going after 1.5 hours. They can climb over a baby gate. I spend every evening tearing my hair out and then sitting crying drinking wine. I can't wait for school to start!! Maybe that will wear the older one out!

Try sitting in the room with them but with lights off, and your back to them, on the floor or away from the beds. When they get out of bed return them immediately and without speaking. You'll have to do this for several hours and for several nights. The not speaking thing will freak them out. PS why are you the only one dealing with this? Where is their father? Not to be nosy, but shouldn't he be doing something to help if he's at home?

alternatively could you just ignore them and leave them to it - I found sometimes with dd she wanted the battle and soon gave up once she realised she wasn't going to get one.

yes, staying in the room does work, if I'm up to it!! Their dad works in the city and very long hours so its pretty much up to me during the week! I have told him its his turn tomorrow. I think ignoring would work too, but can't relax until they are asleep which is stupid, but true!

Feel much better knowing someone else knows what I'm going through!

can you put the little one to bed in your room and transfer her after they're both asleep?

i know it's not necessarily ideal long-term, but it may break the cycle iyswim?

i guess it';s just an attention thing, guaranteed to get you up there., so i think what i'd do is make sure they get LOTS of attention during the day, perhaps put them to bed in separate beds and then explain very clearly to the older one that she is to stay in bed and go to sleep.
then just sit out on the landing with a book and some wine and put them back to bed each time they get out.

ignore any "poohead" comments. i know it's hard, but just pretend you don't even hear.

Do you stay in the room with the lights off AND zero talking because thats the real key when my dd does this - when they get better at settling insist they go to sleep without you in the room

Also I would introduce a sticker chart each - some stickers to reward for things they will do without fuss and some they will really have to try hard to get

So a sticker for listening to a story nicely, sticker for teethbrushing/wash without fuss, sticker for going to sleep

If they get all three stickers then the next morning they get XYZ - I have a jar in the kitchen full of party bag stuff from Tescos - always works as a reward for dd

HTH

all good advice, I'm going to bed a happier lady

Lindam do a puppy / dog gate it is essentailly a taller baby gate!!