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Original poster

Dummy - to use or not to use?

15 replies

freshairfanatic · 09/03/2009 17:22

4 week old DD is crying more and more in the evenings and at night, having been a good sleeper for the first 3 weeks. She's not hungry, hot, cold, in need of changing etc. I have never liked dummies but in desparation gave her one last night, to her and my instant relief. Should we carry on like this at bedtime, giving her a dummy as it clearly comforts her? Or are we setting ourselves up for worse problems in the future? If we do use a dummy, when should we stop? Advice welcome...

OP posts:
dinny · 09/03/2009 17:25

it is now recommended to use a dummy to help prevent SIDS, they say to start at weeks in a bf baby on the website

I am seriously tempted to start dd2 (a week) as my boobs are worn ragged....was thinking of using it initally when she's in her pram doing school run etc, or if I op out and lave dh with her

and maybe just for naps when I know she has fed and my boobs can't take any more!

OldLadyKnowsNothing · 09/03/2009 17:28

If the dummy works, use it. My DS1 had no interest/need and never had one, DS2 did want/need one, and I never regretted it. He gave up aged about 2.5, 3 - he didn't get to take them out of the house after about 2 (he's 18yo now, so it's a struggle to remember ) but in the house, he could keep two or three in his mouth and have another in each hand to fiddle with! Harmless to him, though, and his teeth are perfect.

dinny · 09/03/2009 17:39

I remember wishing with dd1 that I could somehow Sellotape it to her head as I so wanted her to have it (as she screamed SO much) but she spat it out every time

if your dd takes it, go with it, I say!

dinny · 09/03/2009 17:39

I remember wishing with dd1 that I could somehow Sellotape it to her head as I so wanted her to have it (as she screamed SO much) but she spat it out every time

if your dd takes it, go with it, I say!

lou222 · 09/03/2009 18:01

go for it just don't become one of those parents who shoves it in all the time when the baby could clearly take it or leave it.

HSMM · 09/03/2009 18:19

We used one at night and on long car journeys. Never at any other time. Mind you ... it was still hard to get them off her!!!!

lovelymama · 09/03/2009 18:36

go for it. i would have probably died in the first few months without a dummy - either that or my nipples would have fallen off from DS using them as a dummy anyway. By 4 months, DS was able to settle better and we took the dummy away without any problems (best age to take dummy away apparently).

Do yourself a favour and make life as easy as possible in those first few difficult months!

foxytocin · 09/03/2009 18:39

the dummy recommendation comes from one small study which when peer reviewed, has holes in it and which hasn't been replicated. imo, if you are breastfeeding, using a dummy has no benefits wrt to preventing SIDS. if parents want to offer one for other reasons,then that is the call for them to make. i only want people to realise that the SIDS thing is, so far, a non starter.

The ABM has a press release on dummy use.

theicepopqueen · 09/03/2009 18:56

do what you think is right - anything for sleep imo. neither of my dds would take a dummy - in fact dd2 vomitted . consequently they both fed for the first 17 weeks almost constantly!

Original poster
freshairfanatic · 09/03/2009 19:57

thanks for all the replies - guess i should stop worrying so much about it!

OP posts:
Pinkglow · 10/03/2009 21:11

what ever gets you through the night

we used one for DS but I would let him settle with it but then take it out just before he fell asleep. Hes now 4 months old now and doesnt use it at all for settling (unless hes in the car seat but thats a whole other thing)

countrylover · 11/03/2009 14:30

I used one for DS1 and it was wonderful. He rarely cried and by three months we were able to wean him off it in two nights.

I used it selectively and it was a 'when all else fails' solution as opposed to every time he cried.

I think used sensibly dummies can get you through those tough first few months really well.

Nats79 · 11/03/2009 20:16

Dummies are amazing for soothing them and for the first few months I felt like my prayers for sleep had been answered...BUT (and it is a big-ish BUT!) using them can backfire (as it did with us) if the baby starts to get used to the feeling of it in their mouth during sleep and every time they come into a light sleep cycle comes in (about every 45 mins) they wake for it and won't settle without. At about 4 months I was going into the bedroom approx 12 times a night for the dummy. Eventually became too much and had to do 3 nights controlled crying to get rid!! IMO use it to get them to sleep but take it out just before they fall asleep!

HarryB · 11/03/2009 23:34

I sometimes use a dummy when DS is really grizzly or needs soothing, but my trick is to always make sure he doesn't wake up with it still in his mouth so he - hopefully - won't remember ever having it. It has been really handy for getting him used to sleeping in new things, such as from moses to crib. Suffice to say, the MiL thinks I'm a bad mother for even owning one. WITCH.

lionsandtigersandbears · 12/03/2009 11:19

Nats 79.....us too!!! Sometimes I could cry that we don't have it when a major meltdown is occuring but sleep is soooo much better at night now we got rid of the damn thing!!!!I can honestly say that if we are lucky enough to hav another DC I wouldnt use one as we just replaced the 'prop' of him falling asleep on us to a dummy which disturbed all of us and made us miserable with tiredness.

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