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Original poster

Tips for coping with sleep deprivation

12 replies

BarrelOfMonkeys · 20/02/2009 09:40

When I get no sleep, or very little, I am vile to be around: impatient, grumpy, snappy, weepy, horrible to anyone who comes near etc not to mention lack of short term memory and inability to concentrate. I even say nasty things to 6 week old DD and am far less patient with her night feeding and winding, just trying to make her GO TO SLEEP DAMMIT! And now I have another day to get through on 2 hours sleep in last 24.

Any tips on how to cope, both emotionally to make me a nicer mummy/wifey and on a practical level gratefully recieved.

OP posts:
jeminthecity · 20/02/2009 09:44

Can you have a kip in the day? I used to do that with my first, (sorry I'm just assuming its your first baby), when the baby slept, so did I. House looked a bit of a mess but its not the main thing- making sure you get your rest is more important.
Also, sometimes I went to bed REALLY early.

Anyone to walk the baby for an hour while you have a rest?

hope you have a sleep soon!

LightShinesInTheDarkness · 20/02/2009 09:47

Poor you. There is no quick solution, other than be kind to yourself.

Rest on the sofa, eat properly. Coffee and alcohol will make you jittery. Sleep when the baby does, day or night, for however short a time.

Only do what is absolutely necessary around the house, ask for help from friends, neighbours, family - if they care about you they will not be offended if you ask if they could stick a load of washing on.

SnowlightMcKenzie · 20/02/2009 09:59

Barrel: I used to feed myself and then go to bed the instant DH came in through the door at 7ish. He would then bring the baby to me for feeds, and at midnight I would take over baby duty so he can get a good 7 hours.

At around 6 weeks I started expressing and so that was one less feed that DH needed to bring the baby to me so I got more hours in a row.

Hth

schmu · 20/02/2009 10:10

barrel, i used to have a system a bit like snowlight. dh would have dd downstairs from 9 pm till midnight, while i went to bed. then he'd feed them and bring up to me in our room. he then slept in the spare room. not v healthy in some ways, but it meant that i didnt have to do a feed till about 3am.

you have my sympathy, hon

xx

Original poster
BarrelOfMonkeys · 20/02/2009 12:56

Thanks everyone. She doesn't really nap in the day - unless I take her out e.g. to her grandparents where she invariably falls asleep on the spot, and everyone says "isn't she good?" . However the system Starlight suggests sounds good. Usually I am looking after DD while he cooks but separate meals could be the answer. I don't think DH would willingly choose to spend time with Mr Hyde/DrJekyll sleep-deprived me so not missing much!

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SnowlightMcKenzie · 20/02/2009 13:12

tbh it's not great that you don't get evenings with your DH, but you need to figure out what your priorities are.

For me it was sleep, and it really is only temporary whilst you are in the survival period.

AnnVan · 20/02/2009 14:47

barrel I'm in the same boat, so will be watching this. Problem is when I have a meltdown,(usually in the early hours) DP gets up in a fury and we argue, because he then shouts at me and tell me I'm being stupid. I can't do napping during th day, because it takes forver for me to fall asleep, so DS's nap is over before I've gone off.

Original poster
BarrelOfMonkeys · 20/02/2009 16:13

AnnVan, poor you - I am lucky that DH is pretty laid back and when I start properly losing it, usually around 4ish, he will take DD off me for a bit whlie I go have a cry or just be somewhere else while I try and get it together. I feel bad as he has to go to work, but he always needed less sleep than me. I take a good 20 mins to fall asleep so feel for you, I do find if I think I've not got enough time for a sleep in the day on the rare occasions she drifts off for 30 mins that a snatched but relaxing bath can temporarily make me feel better. Finding time to get dressed after can be another matter...

I worship at the altar of sleep, it is top priority!

OP posts:
AnnVan · 20/02/2009 22:30

thankfully my meltdowns don't happen that often barrel

chandellina · 20/02/2009 23:01

maybe the grandparents could come to you, so you can nip off for a nap between feeds?

Spaceman · 20/02/2009 23:13

Live well and mediatate. Mediataion is a godsend. If you 'do' it right, 20 minutes mediataion is as good as hours of sleep (can't remember the exact reported quantity). I used to practice it and it really does work, you need to work at it though to get good.

Original poster
BarrelOfMonkeys · 21/02/2009 08:54

I could try that chandellina, DH is a bit funny about other people looking after DD but if the grandparents happened to come over and I happened to fall asleep... someone other than me/him has to look after her at some point, is the argument I have used unsuccessfully so far...

Spaceman that's an interesting idea - what ssort of meditation do you use?

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