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Original poster

4-5 month olds sleep club, - come and join..........

685 replies

SnowlightMcKenzie · 06/02/2009 13:10

Hiya,

There have been so many threads lately about babies who were beginning to sleep better, but suddenly hitting this regression to newborn hell.

So I thought I would start a support thread for us all to compete whinge about how little sleep we are all getting, and tips on how to cope.

Baby Starlight was up just twice last night, but the previous night it was 6 times, and because of that I kept putting off going to bed at all last night, so even though it wasn't too bad, I still had hardly any sleep

OP posts:
StarlightMcKenzie · 14/03/2009 12:49

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zombiemummy · 14/03/2009 21:50

hello, fellow zombies!

wow, i feel better that am not alone! my ds is 5 months tomorrow but was a preemie...a month early so corrected age is 4 months. either way its bad! he has gone from settling himself to sleep to demanding to be rocked until sound asleep...any earlier and he wakes as soon as he is placed in moses basket. we have ordered a cot bed which mother in law and husband believe will be the miracle cure but it isn't arriving for 3 more weeks. he doesn't nap in the day without being rocked or sleeping in my arms for 20 mins, wakes up tired and can't go back to sleep. he now wakes every 2 hours in the night and i am losing my mind. how did he go from settling himself to this rocking thing? every other bit of advice has been to let him cry it out but have attempted this for a nigt and the rage was not worth it...sure it must work for some but not sure i have the strength to do it...is this just a phase??? feel like blame everything on teeth/growth spurt, neither of which have surfaced yet! help??!

Verso · 19/03/2009 06:20

anyone still here??? helllllllllll0pppppppppppppp

came to the sleep section to start a thread and found this one

DD2 four months next wk and i'm sooooooooooooooo tired i feel so desperate (have pnd and on ads b4 anyone asks)

scuse bad typing NAK

feralgirl · 29/03/2009 08:46

I'm going to shamelssly BUMP this thread and also request permission to join it two days early please?
DS is very nearly 4 months and has gone steadily backwards from waking 1-2 times a night to waking 7-8 times. I've finally surrendered and started co-sleeping which means I'm spending more time in my bed and less asleep in the chair in his room but he woke up at 3.45 this morning and just lay in bed laughing for an 2 hours. It was pitch black and silent so I can only assume he was pissing himself at my desperate attempt to lull him back to sleep.
After stomping into the spare room and sobbing "it's your turn" to DH, I lay in the spare bed for an hour, listening to the bastard birds squawking outside. I'm now re-reading NCSS in the hope that I missed some vital piece of info the first time.

EVERYONE I know in the 'real' world (i.e. not MN) has babies who sleep more than DS; even my friend's 6 week old goes for 6 hours at a time. I'm sick of people raising their eyebrows and telling me that their little princess slept through from 4 weeks.

LeonieSoSleepy · 30/03/2009 11:15

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StarlightMcKenzie · 30/03/2009 17:35

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Verso · 01/04/2009 13:45

feralgirl are you still there? I didn't realise you had replied to the thread... we could commiserate together?

feralgirl · 02/04/2009 09:04

Hi, thanks for the commiserations and the tolerance of my horrendous mood! And hurrah for Leonie (more faces).
DS has now got a cold which is making life even more fun! I'm taking him for cranial osteopathy next week as he had a bit of a grim ventouse delivery so I'm really hoping it'll make a difference. [crossing fingers in blind optimism emoticon]

How are everyone else's DCs getting on? Please let me know I'm not alone in the wee small hours!

LolaBella · 02/04/2009 10:06

Hi Feralgirl I'm also regularly up in the wee small hours. Ds was a lovely sleeper (only up once a night) until 17 weeks and since then we have slowly deteriorated . At its peak on Sunday night it was six times. I am breastfeeding so i generally offer breast if he wakes up as i simply don't have the energy to try any other techniques.

It is also like musical beds in our house . Ds always starts off in his cot then when he wakes we co sleep and poos dp goes into spare room.

Ds is now 22 weeks today and last night it was only 4 wakings. Everynight i pray that he will go longer but generally no. People keep saying it's a phrase and it will pass but i'm still waiting to see that light at the end of the tunnel.

Sorry if this is depressing you further but i really know how you feel. Is your dp helping at all?

KiwiPanda · 02/04/2009 15:48

Can I join early? DD is 15 weeks tomorrow and has gone from a reasonable 4/5 hour followed by two 3 hour stretches to waking every 2 hours and taking forever to settle and suddenly developing bad wind. Lost the plot last night and spent all of it sobbing

Do I qualify for membership??

LolaBella · 02/04/2009 16:15

Oh Kiwi sorry to hear that. It's awful isn't it especially when your body is just starting to get used to a little sleep. Welcome to newborn hell again.

I think part of the no sleep issue is accepting that you are not going to get much sleep on a night and any good stint you do get is a bonus. I am TRYING not to get too worked uo about it and am since finding that it is slightly easier to deal with. For example, my LO sometimes wakes up in the night and is a nightmare to resettle so i just bring him downstairs for a while where he is all smiles and then attempt to settle again after a good cup of tea for me and a little play on the floor for him. More often than not it works.

Keep posting and hopefully we can help each other through

smurfette15 · 03/04/2009 14:42

I am going through the same. DS is 17 weeks & this week has been hell. We were down to 2 bf a night but it is now every 1 1/2 - 2 hours. He sleeps ok from 7.30pm til about 10.30-11ish and that's the longest stretch. He is also getting more difficult to resettle when previously, ssh/pat had worked. Daytime naps last no longer then 40 mins so no chance to catch up then.

To add insult to injury, 3yo DD has started getting up at all hours again as she did when DS was 1st born (previously she was a great sleeper). She usually picks the times that DS has finally gone to sleep to come in to the bedroom. I am slowly going insane with sleep deprivation and can see why it is used as a form of torture!

smurfette15 · 04/04/2009 10:44

Truly awful night . Went down at 7.45pm, woke for feed at 11pm. Slept for 1 hr, screamed for 1 1/2, slept for just under 2 screamed for 1. I'm ashamed to say that I had to leave him to cry at 1 point . On my own last night as DP away and nothing was soothing him. I tried feeding, ssh/pat, pupd, changing nappy, feeding again but he still cried and cried. I could feel myself getting more frustrated and angry at him so had to leave him for a while and he cried himself to sleep while I sobbed and hated myself. He is full of lovely smiles this morning which has made me feel even more terrible in a way.

I am miserable, despondent, depressed, a wicked mum and so tired, I feel physically ill

StarlightMcKenzie · 04/04/2009 11:00

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smurfette15 · 04/04/2009 11:22

I will try Starlight. I am now finding that even when both LOs have gone to sleep, I take ages to relax and drop off.

I have asked my dad & step-mum to stay for the weekend whilst DP is away so that I don't have a repeat of last night and they can watch DC this afternoon while I (hopefully) nap.

feralgirl · 04/04/2009 19:52

Oh Smurfette, your post bought tears to my eyes (why isn't there an emoticon with massive bags under its eyes, going into full on melt down mode through lack of sleep?!) I had a nap time like that last week where I had to go and sit on the front doorstep for two minutes because I was getting so frustrated (could still hear DS wailing, so I knew he was OK, before anyone gets too )

Also had a morning this week where I cried for two hours and made DH pull a sicky because I couldn't hack it any more. God love him, i moan endlessly about what a lazy monkey he is but, in answer to your question Lola, he does his bit really! He's got a week off this week so he's taking pole position to see if we can break the habit of DS waking 5 times a night and refusing to settle until I BF him (as per NCSS suggestion; it's the only thing we haven't tried). And Lola, we were doing the musical beds thing too, but we've just resigned ourselves to sleeping in seperate rooms for the moment.

We're also taking DS for cranial osteopathy; he was a tricky ventouse delivery so hope, hope, hope that it makes a difference!

It's so comforting to know that there are other MNers out there doing the same thing at the same time during the wee small hours.

feralgirl · 04/04/2009 19:54

Have just realised that I've told you all twice about the CO. Sorry for going on; blame the lack of sleep and my tentative excitement about it!

smurfette15 · 04/04/2009 20:07

Thanks feralgirl. It does help to know that I'm not the only one.

I will watch with interest to see how you get on with the cranial osteopathy. DS was also a difficult ventouse delivery with shoulder dystocia.

Lets hope tonight is better [praying furiously emoticon]

feralgirl · 05/04/2009 22:05

Interestingly, having DH take control of the night does seem to be working (touch wood).

DS, despite having a stinking cold, only fully woke up twice between 7pm and 7am last night. My angelic DH spent most of the night rubbing his back as he was v restless but I only had to go in and do very quick 10 min feeds at 11pm and 3.30am (although I took over back-rubbing duty at 6am when DH looked like he might cry! )

I guess having the boobless parent doing the night shift means that DS doesn't immediately think "ooh, lovely warm milk and a hug from mummy!"

Meant I got the best night's sleep I've had in months!

LackaDAISYcal · 05/04/2009 22:17

Wipes bleary eyes and wades through treacle to say Hi.

Ds is five months and usually wakes up two or three times a night. He goes at best three hours from 8 till eleven and then usually is up and feeding every 2 hours after that.

A few nights this week DH has slept in the living room with him in his pram to allow me to get some sleep as I've had a post op wound infection on top of a really bad cold and was literally on my knees

We did this again on Friday night and last night. Last night he slept from 11.45 to 6.15 ....a first. But, he is back in the sodecar cot with me tonight and I think it's my proximity that's waking him.

Anyway, nice to meet you all and hello to the familiar "faces". Off to have a read and see if I can get any tips

feralgirl · 08/04/2009 23:04

Aw, Daisy, that sounds hideous. I hope you're feeling a bit better now?

My CO looks as though it may have had a bit of an effect; DS only woke once last night (although he did then take an hour to get back to sleep as he was rolling around in his bed doing his hysterical laughing thing again, bizarre child).

smurfette15 · 09/04/2009 07:34

One waking sounds good feralgirl! Fingers crossed the CO has worked. Keep us posted & if it continues working, we'll give it a try!

DS has slept 3 hours between feeds for the last few nights which is an improvement. He had his 4 month jabs yesterday so I'm braced for further unsettled periods though!!

DP has been off work this week and has got up with the LOs and left me in bed for a lie in which has been bliss

How's DS doing back in the cot Daisy? We were wondering if my close proximity unsettles DS too as he is soothed back to sleep much quicker by DP.

KiwiPanda · 09/04/2009 09:26

Hello fellow sufferers. After two days and nights of 2-hourly feeding round the clock I got two 3 hour stints last night.. it's something, eh?? I have had stinking cold though - which I think DD gave me, cheers for that

Interesting what people say about proximity. I don't know if that might be a problem with us - she sleeps in basket right by bed. But I think another problem is that she wakes, takes a short feed and then falls asleep straight away after only 8 mins or so. I reckon if I could get her to eat a bit more (she does 10=15 minutes in day) she might sleep a little longer, but I can't seem to manage it. Does anyone have any tips for waking a baby up a BIT but not to full on "aghh you woke me up I'm going to have a meltdown now" mode"?

smurfette15 · 09/04/2009 10:15

Kiwi I have the same problem sometimes. When DS nods off after a few gulps, I stroke his cheek or massage the palm of his hand to encourage him to feed a bit longer. Then I swap sides. Doesn't always work though!

feralgirl · 13/04/2009 12:04

Hey,
May have to retract what I said about the CO; DS has gone steadily backwards from that one amazing night and last night woke at 11.30 (despite having been dreamfed at 10.30) and then didn't settle properly until 2am. As if that wasn't enough, he then woke at 5am and refused to go back to sleep! He's been having a full on growth spurt though so it might ease off in a few days.

At least I got a 3 hour stretch in the middle...

Smurfette and Kiwi, I do the same to try an encourage DS to fill his belly; quite often he'll do the opposite though and feed so much that he's then sick everywhere!

DH got the day off tomorrow so is back on the night shift tonight. Maybe I should move DS back into his own room to see if it resolves the proximity prob.

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