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4-5 month olds sleep club, - come and join..........

685 replies

SnowlightMcKenzie · 06/02/2009 13:10

Hiya,

There have been so many threads lately about babies who were beginning to sleep better, but suddenly hitting this regression to newborn hell.

So I thought I would start a support thread for us all to compete whinge about how little sleep we are all getting, and tips on how to cope.

Baby Starlight was up just twice last night, but the previous night it was 6 times, and because of that I kept putting off going to bed at all last night, so even though it wasn't too bad, I still had hardly any sleep

OP posts:
Anglepoise · 16/02/2009 22:54

Cranial osteopathy helped us too - fingers crossed it works for you as well. Your kids are gorgeous!

Off to bed with the headache I've been nursing all day - wishing good nights to all of us ...

SnowlightMcKenzie · 16/02/2009 23:11

Hope the headache clears.

OP posts:
sambo303triesforScotland · 17/02/2009 09:41

loulou I also was going to suggest a cranial osteopath for leonie - leonie it's worth a shot, an nct friend recently started going with her little girl because she just seemed so unhappy and would not sleep for longer than 40 mins and cries a lot - her husband compared her to the rest of the group's babies and said she just doesnt seem right in herself, not happy in her skin sort of thing and that decided them to go for the treatment. She had a good sleep the night of her first session, and has settled down a bit.

we had a good night last night - and I really think that the few good nights we've had in the last 4 weeks (about 4) are the start of a way out of this situation - ds is 24 weeks this Thursday and we are getting him a high chair and starting his 'play' with food as soon as - he is really into food and is grabbing what he can and stuffing it in his mouth (dp has been surruptitiously starting blw early). He is still waking at 9.30pm (after a 7pm bf and bedtime) and I fed him, he woke at midnight for more food and again at 3.45am, then asleep til 7.20am. Wonderful, I feel human once more Amusingly my nct chums whose babies had been sleeping through the night and are now waking twice a night are shattered and I'm calling that a really good night

myjobismum · 17/02/2009 10:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Skimty · 17/02/2009 11:40

Sambo - i think you get very tired and then you go into a resigned phase where you are grateful for any sleep. One of my NCT friends said that in a way I was lucky when DD was born because at least I was used to being up with DS

my job - sounds great, at least there's hope!

leonie - your kids are gorgeous, hope you have a good day.

Skimty · 17/02/2009 11:41

I'm not even going to comment on our night...

Anglepoise · 17/02/2009 13:41

Thanks snowlight - much better after a Tylenol (?sp) and a few hours' sleep. Think it was my first hangover in over a year - uck!

Congrats myjob and oh dear Skimty - hope you're okay ...

Not a bad night for us - think she was up around 3 or 4 times (not really sure, also think I fell asleep mid-feed, which is always confusing) but we seem to have got our sleep cycles in synch, so I'd wake up and a few minutes later DD would and I'd feed her, so at least I wasn't getting my deep sleep interrupted iyswim. Feel better today than yesterday anyway

Am I a terrible mother because I never bother to see if she wants anything else other than food? I just stick her on the boob, she goes back to sleep and I put her down again ... Only exception was when she woke at 5.40 following a 5 am feed night before last when (because of this thread) I just rocked her a few times instead.

cyteen · 17/02/2009 15:46

Awake every two hours here although to be fair to DS, two of those times were the cat's fault .

daisyblue · 17/02/2009 15:56

howdy!
myjob - that is great news (and who knows where it could lead...)
skimty - know the feeling!
Anglepoise - you are most definately NOT a terrible mother (or you wouldn't even ask question/be on here i always just popped dd on boob too (much easier, esp when u are tired) but the other night i got away with 2x shh pats - didn't even have to lift her out of cot! amazing!

cyteen - thanks, i feel a bit better about the whole formula thing now (picked my ego up from the floor etc ..) guess the wee madam is just telling me what she wants ... for a change

she still appears to want the boob at night wakes tho

good luck tonight everyone

loulou33 · 17/02/2009 16:59

hi all,
crap night here as i was up at 1am sorting the heating out - the thermostat suddenly decided to come on so the house was boiling. took me 20 mins to work out to turn the damn thing off!!! joe woke at 3am and would not go back to sleep til 5am and i could not sleep either...so i had a few hours before 1am and a snooze before both woke at 7am - not as bad as some i know but still i fee v tired now.

Leonie - yeh, ritalin is not a nice drug and you wouldn't take amphetamine every day for years without worrying what it was doing to you? having said that soem people swear by it and it has 'helped' lots of kids so maybe i'm wrong. there should be a cranial osteopath near you - try to find one who specialises in children and has peadiatric osteopathy qualification - good luck

averagemum · 17/02/2009 18:16

OK sisters, I don't want to jinx it by writing it down, but just in case we HAVE emerged from sleep deprivation hell and this could help someone / give someone some hope here goes... for the past 5 nights ds has woken up either twice (!!) or just once (!!!) between 6.30pm and 6.30am... It might be a fluke, it might be that he's just finally got the hang of this sleep thing (naps have started getting longer too), it might be something we did? Very unlikely, but here's what we've been doing just in case:

  • completely maxed out on the sleep associations: he's been rocked and dummied and sleeping with a blankie and shhed and having his head stroked and anything else I can think of that isn't feeding him every time he wakes up or breastfeeding him to sleep (though of course if any of the above didn't work within about 2 minutes I'd whack him on the boob)...
  • putting him down awake after a feed in the night - kissing him loudly so he'd rouse a little bit and then sort of drift off in his cot...
  • I know it's just not possible / thinkable for everyone, but
feeding and napping at regular times in the day helped (I think!) - he seems be feeling sleepy at the same kinds of times, and putting him down is a million times easier than it was a few weeks ago. Sounds very GF I know, but maybe it's made a difference? Dunno - wishing everyone a better night...
AnnVan · 17/02/2009 20:19

ooo. Can I join? (although seriously wish I didn't have to)
DS is five months and one day old. Was sleeping through but since early december has been in sleeping hell.

CantSleepWontSleep · 17/02/2009 20:23

Well, another utterly crap 2 nights here. I couldn't post last night as internet was down at my parents (due to some software dh had fiddled with during the day) and needed us to go into the room where ds was asleep to fix it. He slept for 40 mins and was then awake for about 45, taking a huge feed, which I figured would last him a good few hours, but no, it lasted a whole two. And he was then up between every 10 mins and an hour. At 5am he decided that that was it for the night, and we were then up until about 6:45, when he then went back to sleep for an hour and 10 mins. Today he's dozed on an off a fair bit in the car and pushchair, but hadn't napped for 3.5-4 hrs before bedtime, and consequently got hysterical with tiredness and wouldn't calm down to feed. Eventually settled him on my lap downstairs, and tried to feed him when he stirred a bit half an hour later. Have just put him upstairs, but suspect not for too long, as he's not fed enough to last.
He now has another cold just to make life even harder, as he struggles to breathe when feeding, so comes off spluttering and upset. Have put a karvol vaporisor in the room to try and help, and also given medised (I know that the age limit for this has changed, but as I understand it it's only because some people were too stupid not to combine it with other paracetamol ).

The odd thing that I find is that ds seems to take a lot of good feeds in the night, and I can't really understand why they aren't filling him up for longer. I know that my milk will be enough for him until 6 months, but I don't really want to be feeding almost every hour night and day in order to achieve this! He's piling on the weight too (was 17lb 3oz at last weigh in at 17.5wks), so is clearly getting plenty!

Well done on finding the light at the end of the tunnel averagemum. How old is your ds now, and how long have you been having badly disturbed nights for now?

Anglepoise - if you're a terrible mother than so am I. (and I'm not btw )

Leonie - your dd2 actually sounds a lot like my dd was in many ways. She was a nightmare baby, and also nearly became an only child because of it (dh was set on not having any more, but I persuaded him otherwise once he could start to see that things would improve one day). Am I remembering correctly that you are dairy free, or am I muddling you with someone else? My dd calmed down quite a bit when I gave it up at 16 weeks, when we finally realised that she was intolerant to it! Irritability is a common symptom, and dd would scream all the bloody time presumably (with hindsight) because she was having stomach cramps. My dd didn't refuse feeds when out (in fact she fed pretty much constantly day and night, as oddly the cause of the problem (my milk) also provided some temporary relief ) but refusal can be common in intolerant children (hence failure to thrive is often a symptom).

cyteen · 17/02/2009 20:36

Hi Ann

sambo303triesforScotland · 17/02/2009 20:54

yes hi ann, good to see you but that you need to be on here too.

averagemum thanks for sharing that info - I am doing something similar..ie keeping regular times for getting up/bedtime/naps/feeds (where possible) on the advice of one of the ladies on the postnatal thread Im on and I've persevered for over a month now, and I really think it's helping gradually. We do the same bedtime routine too - bath, massage, same nursery rhyme every night. At least I know where I am even if DS doesn't.

Hoping for improved sleep tonight for all

cyteen · 17/02/2009 21:05

I definitely think that routine helps, in the sense of doing the same things each time; we've never had anything like that in the day and DS's daytime sleep is fitful, whereas we've had a bedtime routine of bath-feed-sleep for months and he is pretty reliable there. On my SIL's example I have recently started carrying DS around the room at bedtime, post-feed, and saying goodnight to a selection of things - always the same things in the same order. Coincidentally or not, he has been going down really well during this period It has also had the happy side effect of involving my dead mother and brother in his life, as their photographs are the first things we say goodnight to.

loulou33 · 17/02/2009 21:15

what a lovely idea cyteen. i like having a routine to nightimes and have found both mine respond to it, most of the time. i find daytime routines much harder this time around as have ds1 means ds2 has to fit round him sometimes and vice versa as well

CantSleepWontSleep · 17/02/2009 21:41

Another one here who has routine for bedtime but not for daytime!

myjobismum · 17/02/2009 22:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AnnVan · 17/02/2009 23:17

My attempt to have an evening routine has gone out the window. His sleep is so unpredictable. Like tonight, he has fallen asleep just before 10. Is still asleep, but I don't know how long for. Also, if he goes to sleep early, he tends to treat it as a nap, and then stays up till the early hours.

bunnynbumblesmum · 17/02/2009 23:34

hiya girls, just found your thread and its just what i'm looking for, far too tired to read all the posts, my ds now 5 months and was up 4 or 5 times so decided to wean him, has breakfast and tea and eats loads, still waking in night but now only at ten and then 2ish and then up for day anytime from 6, should i startgetting him 3 meals????????

sambo303triesforScotland · 18/02/2009 07:22

myjobismum would it be less stressful just to do DD's routine for bed at 9pm - this may be her natural bedtime at the mo, and could gradually be brought forward in the future? I have found I get most stressed/upset when I try to impose stuff on my ds which is not his way of doing things and I'm only doing it because of outside pressures

My routine is strict only on the time to get up (7am) and the time to bed (by 7pm - earlier if tired). During the day I follow ds's lead as to naps/feeds though some days I can discern a nap pattern. I dont think I could stick to a strict day time routine as we are often out and about.

Terrible night here to make up for the previous good one - sod's law! And I'm going out visiting all day to day. Poor ds has an awful cold and could not breathe so I had to keep putting him on his side (we co slept in the spare room on a mattress ). I had to remove us to the spare room at 3am cos after feeding he decided it was time to have a sing and chat with mummy . Then I dont think we slept more than about 40 mins at a time

sambo303triesforScotland · 18/02/2009 07:25

bunny I've not started weaning yet so cant comment from personal experience but nct friends who are weaning early have said it has not improved their LO's sleep. Some are waking more due to digestion problems. Is your ds having plenty of milk feeds still? There's more calories in milk than food.

AnnVan · 18/02/2009 07:47

Morning Sambo - I had a decent night here. I agree about not trying to force a bedtime at the moment. There's no point for us at this point, as it just makes things worse, and as you say, I get more stressed. Last night little man fell asleep at 10, and he was woken by DP's sodding alarm at 6 this morning. He would probably have gone back off if it wasn't for the fact that daddy snoozes his bloody alarms, so he was getting re-woken every 5 minutes. Only person still asleep at 6.30 was DP DP trotted out the bloody line 'when he has a nap you can sleep' yes, it's as easy as that - I don't fall asleep the moment my head hits the pillow - it takes me a good two hours to fal asleep.

CantSleepWontSleep · 18/02/2009 08:20

Slightly better night here, as I think ds only woke about 7 times, and resettled a bit more easily some of those times (with a feed of course). Maybe the medised he had for his cold helped, and the karvol vaporisor.

Personally I wouldn't give 3 meals a day before your ds reaches the age at which weaning should start bbm. How about more milk instead?

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