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Original poster

I cant do this anymore

37 replies

turtle23 · 21/01/2009 10:02

I am broken. DS is nearly 10 months, was sleeping through occasionally in the last few weeks, but his recurrent teething trouble is depleting me of any energy and I fear that I am becoming useless as a mother. We have been to a CO, we have done homeopathy, we have tried every gel and medicine known to man. Last night he woke every 20 minutes and only slept fitfully inbetween. His teeth take about 6 weeks from start to finish. The last two weeks they are purple and swollen. He bites everything including me(am still breastfeeding) and after another night like last night I dont know what to do. I dont feel safe to drive. I cant sleep even when he does as I am so stressed. DH is useless. I am beginning to think that I will have to give up BF and take a sleeping pill to have the energy to go on. Or worse...not give up BF and hope it knocks him out too. I cant keep this up. I have not had more than 4 hours in a row since he was born. Have no family around and no friends who will have him for the night. I am desperate.

OP posts:
mishkamoo · 21/01/2009 10:08

Don't have any words of wisdom I'm afraid (DS only 15wks) but you sound so down so I just wanted to say you have my sympathies. Sleep deprivation is a form of torture that they use on Prisoners of war and it is brutal. I know it doesn't feel like it but it will get better. Can anyone have him for you for an afternoon, or could he go to nursery, just so you can have but of a break/try and snatch some sleep??

pamelat · 21/01/2009 10:19

Really sorry.

I know you say you have tried everything (medicine wise) but have you tried anbesol liquid? My DD really suffers when she is teething and this is the only thing that seems to help.

Is there a creche or nursery near by that you could use? I know a friend who booked her DS in for 3 hours and just went home and slept for the afternoon. It was £15 for the afternoon, she considered this money very well spent and the creche distracted DS.

Original poster
turtle23 · 21/01/2009 11:25

pamelat-yup, tried it. am trying to find somewhere...

OP posts:
pamelat · 21/01/2009 13:24

Good luck. I think most local leisure centres have a creche?

notnowbernard · 21/01/2009 13:27

I am going to be controversial and suggest Controlled Crying

It is considered very unpopular by many - what are you're thoughts on it?

slim22 · 21/01/2009 13:35

teetha?

I really do sympathise.
same here, except DD is 9 months and I am so grateful I have help this time round.

cat nap in the day when he does.

there are only 2 solutions: co-sleeping or CC

{{{{{{{{{{{{{biiiiiiiiig hug}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

notnowbernard · 21/01/2009 13:37

I've had 2 crap sleepers. At different stages though... dd1 was crap as a younger baby, dd2 was at her peak of terribleness at about 7-8m

I really do sympathise

BTW, CC worked for 1 but not the other, so I'm not saying it is the cure-all of sleep problems

Original poster
turtle23 · 21/01/2009 16:53

Did CC for nearly two weeks. Couldn't hack it anymore as it wasn't improving AT ALL. He is in pain. He sleeps when he isn't. Fair enough, I guess.

OP posts:
Petrovia · 21/01/2009 16:56

I'm not too surprised CC didn't work when he was in pain!

How many teeth has he now?

DwayneDibbley · 21/01/2009 17:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Petrovia · 21/01/2009 17:05

Turtle I might be way off but reading this and your other thread before, you sound really really stressed and unsupported.

I wonder if DH is making you feel worse about it all than you otherwise would?

You don't have to discuss him of course if you'd rather not but saying he's useless is quite strong and it might be a big factor.

Original poster
turtle23 · 21/01/2009 17:29

He has 9 1/2. When we started the CC he wasn't teething. I stopped when I realised it was the dreaded teeth again. DH not worth discussing. He has said he will have DS from 730-1200 tonight so am taking him up on it before he changes his mind again.

OP posts:
DwayneDibbley · 21/01/2009 18:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

CarGirl · 21/01/2009 18:11

Have you tried teething powders (to settle usually more acidic tummy), in conjunction with paracetamol & nurofen & anbesol? Ensure they have max safe dose for overnight.

Also go to the drs to ensure he doesn't have earache or something as well that is being disguised by the fact you know he is currently teething?

It's truly hell and yes you need your dh to do part of the night shift so you can get some sleep. Can he do evenings so you can go to bed at 6pm and then get up at midnight or something crazy like that?

Petrovia · 21/01/2009 18:19

we have 12 (just) at 19mo and it looks like yours might be finished by the time he's one!

Doozle · 21/01/2009 18:23

Are you sure he doesn't have an ear infection or something like that? Think it would be good to check him over at the GPs

Sycamoretree · 21/01/2009 18:25

Flame me if you like, but I would use Medised.

I know the guidelines have changed, but responsible parents know what is appropriate.

I don't know how I would have got through teething with both mine with it. When DD had it it was still reccommended from 3 months.

They changed the ruling when DS was about 8 months or something. I asked a GP friend who said what nonsense and to use it as I had with DD.

Your choice, of course, but teething is hell for parents and child alike. The pain is awful, and the fever that often comes with it. You both need your sleep, and medised is very helpful for these times.

notnowbernard · 21/01/2009 18:38

Re-read OP

If ds is definitely teething, and in pain and distress, CC not good (for obvious reasons)

DD2 is 2.5y and still teething, btw...

I feel I must add that CC is not ignoring your child, however

In your situation I would co-sleep. HAd to do it with dd2

Petrovia · 21/01/2009 18:40

I think OP already co sleeps Bernard. Hope she gets a rest this eve!

notnowbernard · 21/01/2009 18:48

Poor OP

I remember those days v well, sooo hard

Turtle - it will get better... honestly

Original poster
turtle23 · 21/01/2009 18:58

Just checking in before I go to bed. (argh)
I do co-sleep, would have keeled over or fallen down the stairs by now if I didn't!!
I am one of the unfortunate ones who has a DC who goes loopy with Medised. Otherwise I would!
Re having him checked at GP-have been to dr three times in two months making sure it is "just" teeth. They think I'm barking as GP's kids "never had as much trouble as this little chap."
I am all for medicine, but he has been having bouts like this since he got his first tooth 6 months ago and you cannot give them Nurofen constantly...he'll have no kidneys left!

OP posts:
Doozle · 21/01/2009 19:10

Does he have a fever at all Turtle?

Maybe it is just teething. The only other thing I could think of is an allergy that's causing him some upset (but wouldn't necessarily be glaringly obvious to a doctor)

pamelat · 21/01/2009 19:23

I was also told to use Medised. I bought it but didnt dare use it. DD is 12 months

Does anyone know why we are not meant to use it?

I told pharmacist that I had a 6 year old

peggotty · 21/01/2009 19:44

There is no harm in giving nurofen or calpol on a long term basis, they do not accumulate in the system and are not habit forming. I know 2 doctors who both say this. My ds is 12months and is an awful teether, it is the only thing which unsettles his sleep now, and it can also go on for about 6 weeks before any teeth actually make an appearance! Absolutely. Bloody. Horrendous. I use medised for him when his sleep is at it's worse, 5ml at bedtime. The longest I have used it for is a week. I don't give him calpol if I am using medised but do sometimes give nurofen. Noone is going to swoop in and put your child in care if you occasionally and judiciously give medised to an under-2. Banning it for use in under-2's was just a huge overreaction to a minority or people who were either abusing it as a sedative or not realising it is paracetemol based and giving it with calpol and overdosing their children.

chatti · 21/01/2009 22:00

Turtle23. You have my sympathy. DS, 11 months is on 8.5 teeth, full of snotty cold and is waking every 1-2 hours. So debilitating and very hard to keep going. You really do need support.Can you agree a deal with DH so that he is on duty for the early part of the evening so that you can clock up some undisturbed sleep? If not can you ask a relative/friend to stay for a week? I personally wouldn't go the medised route. Try and hang on in there... it will pass. Keep thinking ahead and make life as simple as possible, easy food, home deliveries etc. It will probably be for just a few more weeks. I stuck two words on my fridge today...optimism and faith. Only managed to have this outlook at DH made sure I got some sleep last night! Who knows what words will go up tomorrow!! Best of luck.

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