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Sleep

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Original poster

15 month ds breastfeeding all night, please help me to night wean, any success stories????

17 replies

luvaduck · 29/12/2008 13:41

Not sure whether to put this in sleep or feeding.

My lovely ds now 15 months was exc bf till 6 months and currently takes 3 meals a day, plus snacks. He has a bf first thing, and one before bed. He has milk in a cup mid afternoon, and we are trying to introduce it in the evening but he doesn't take much, and then bf's for ages.

At night he wakes at 130, 330, and 630 for breastfeeds, and start the day at 8. I can't take anymore - I'm sick of being exhausted all the time, snappy at my (v supportive dh).I look like shit and feel nauseous with tiredness all the time. He is in the same room and I don't want to start co-sleeping now.

I think the time has come to stop - the night is much more of a problem than the day. If i could carry on just doing the morning feed for another few months that would be ok, but I would really like to stop it all.

Any tips? How the hell do you actually do it, without being awake trying to pacify a screaming toddler all night?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Original poster

luvaduck · 29/12/2008 14:00

anyone? desperate bump...

OP posts:

rubyslippers · 29/12/2008 14:01

No Cry Sleep Solution by elizabeth pantley

usually available on Amazon

Kristingle · 29/12/2008 14:01

i dont knwo the answer but woudl like to..so i can night wean mine

bumping for you

Original poster

luvaduck · 29/12/2008 14:04

thanks for replying
i've read NCSS several times over - seems more about weaning if you are co-sleeping, and also he settles alone in the evening and for his day nap.

how old is yours kristingle?

OP posts:

Kristingle · 29/12/2008 16:55

you dont want to know...i mean you REALLY dont want to know

and he wakes far more often than yours, in the day and during the night

georgimama · 29/12/2008 16:59

If anyone drops by with an answer please let me know, my DS is 22months and co-sleeps to BF most nights from 2am or so. If he just wanted to sleep in our bed that would be fine (we like cuddling up all together) but the constant hanging off my nipple is beginning to get a little grating.

If I thought he would self wean in the next three or four months I would just carry on, but I don't see why or how that is suddenly going to happen when it hasn't happened so far......

Kristingle · 29/12/2008 17:04

thats what i thought.....i read here and on kellymom that they often lose interest in Bf towards their second birthday

pinkem · 29/12/2008 17:08

My ds is 2yrs next week, since he was born he has been breast fed to sleep.

Over christmas we have stopped breast feeding, everytime ds woke in the night my husband went to him with water. On night three he just spoke over the intercom to tell him it was sleep time and last night...my son slept from 7pm till 7.30am!!!

It takes a about 3/4 nights of waking/crying but will hopefully result in many years of peaceful nights.

I have gone from about 5 hours sleep a night due to getting up every few hours, to 9 hours.

I think you have to reach a point when you are really fed up, set a plan then stick to it.

If you have any questions let me know. Obviously every child is different though!

Kristingle · 29/12/2008 17:21

pink - is your toddler still in a cot? why didnt he come and get you? my Ds woudl search teh house for me.....

i am encouraged to knwo that it only took you 3-4 nights

alittleteapot · 29/12/2008 17:37

this was working well for us till be had to stop because other things were going on in the family, but we're going to start again

www.drjaygordon.com/development/ap/sleep.asp

it's aimed at co-sleepers but could be adapted if that's not your situation. Good luck!

pinkem · 29/12/2008 17:46

Forgot to mention that we have taken his bars off the cot aswell, we just put a gate on the door. He can now get up and play with his toys in the morning.

We thought as seen as he likes our bed so much he might like his own big boy bed!

I can't believe how easy it has been i'm waiting to wake up to find him using me as a dummy again!!

We also got a clock/night light that closes its eyes at bed time then will open them at a set time in the morning. ds presses the button to close the eyes after his bed time story. This has worked well he just shouts us when the eyes open.

He has still been asking for mummy milk through the day but i just tell him because he is a big boy he drinks milk out of a cup now.

CorrieDale · 29/12/2008 18:03

I got my DH involved, both times. He went in, cuddled, shushed, whatever it took to get them back to sleep. There were tears both times but it was super-successful with DS. Less so with DD but she doesn't get a feed now until 5.30. She's up at 4am asking for one though!

Original poster

luvaduck · 29/12/2008 19:37

pinkem - how much crying was involved??? i can imagine ds screaming for hours if he saw dh with a cup. def need to move into own room though. how did your dh get him back to sleep?

was your ds feeding for a long time at each feed or just to settle?

thanks! great to know it can be done

OP posts:

fleacircus · 29/12/2008 19:44

DD is 12mths, eats well, exc BF to 6mths. She did very occasionally sleep through so we knew she could, didn't need the night feeds. Putting her in her own room helped a lot, and for a friend of mine whose 9mth DS was co-sleeping and waking repeatedly, moving him into his own room has just completely solved his sleep problem, he now goes straight through. She had already stopped feeding him at night, though, it was just the waking up which was a problem.

With DD we agreed that if she woke up before 2am DP would go to comfort and settle her, if it was after 2am I'd go (which inevitably meant feeding her). Within a couple of weeks she'd stopped waking early, and was waking usually sometime between 3.30 and 5am. At that point we shifted it so that DP would go then instead of me, and she now (another week or so later) wakes at about 5.30. We then bring her into the bed and I give her a morning BF, and after that - so at about 6am - we usually accept that the day has begun and get her up for some weetabix. At first DP was having to spend quite a lot of time with her, but it really did make a difference very quickly and we all feel much better now!

Original poster

luvaduck · 29/12/2008 19:46

what a great idea- the swapping of who goes in - will give it a go
ta!

OP posts:

pinkem · 29/12/2008 20:24

The first night i think about 10/15 minutes of crying at most.

I was doing a 5 minute feed at about midnight then brought him in to my bed when he woke in the early hours so he could help himself (I get up at 6.30am for work) I thought bringing him in with me would let me get some sleep but i just ended up with sore boobies and aching from being in one position!!

Dh went to ds room gave cuddle if upset then told him that it was still sleepy time, if he was really upset he would lie down next to him for a while. He also offered him a dummy, he has never taken one before, but he is teething at the minute so he chews it for a bit!

ChrismumMiaow · 29/12/2008 20:51

We're currently on night 3 of night weaning our 11mo DS. He has done 7-5 several times over the last few weeks, and the rest of the time wakes once during that time and has a half-hearted feed. We saw he could clearly go without milk for that time, so we've done a version of the dr jay gordon approach.

DS has been in his own room since 6 months - and that really improved his sleep as I'm sure I was disturbing him, and he's gradually got better on his own, we're just helping him take this last step. The rule is no milk between 10 and 4 (at the moment - will work up to 5am, then maybe 6am, depending on how it goes). If he wakes before that, DH settles him. The first night it took nearly 2 hours (although he was in a different sort of cloth nappy to normal and when DH changed it he settled straight away!) and last night only 50 minutes, so we're hopeful for tonight.
The first night he then woke at 4.30 and was fed, then came in with us till 7 when he woke. Last night it was 4.50 when he again came in with us.

Unfortunately DS vomited on me just before he went to sleep, so I'm going to dream feed him (it works really well in that he does it in his sleep, but doesn't always make a difference to his waking) to make sure he's not hungry before imposing the milk ban!

Anyway, I can't say it has worked yet, but it seems to be getting easier and much of the time is DH settling him to sleep, waiting for him to go into a deep sleep, then having DS wake when he goes in to the cot, so having to try again - so there isn't all that much crying (great as I find I can doze through it). It does help that DH is really good at settling DS at bedtime too.

HTH!

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