HELP! backwards step and HV wasn't too much use - any new ideas re waking DS 2.9 mo

[SpandexIsMyEnemy]

HELP! lol.

he's back to waking and coming in my bed again. at the mo it's about 3am ish he's coming in. and stopping in there - today it was 5am by the time we got back to sleep again thanks to his fidgeting.

he went thru this before and I basically took to the floor of his bed with an inflatable - things got better for about a week then he went away with XH (slept in a double bed with XH away) and has come back worse again - I can't do this again for another 6 months or more. nor can I sleep on his floor indefinitely.

h.v today is suggesting I readdress his bed time routein - hes' had the same one since 3 mo thou.

he goes to bed fine (most of the time)

he likes to 'hold hands' when i'm on the floor/he's next to me in bed - so i'm partly thinking a reassurance thing? he's with me all day we have plenty of cuddles etc thru out the day.

any new ideas??

I've tried - reasoning with him - putting him back in his bed, (resulted in 2 hours of screaming), sleeping on the floor.

he's warm, he's not wet (well was today but isn't usually), he's not hungry.

if one more person tells me it's a phase i'll blinking well scream!!!!! all i'm asking for is my bed back and a little sleep.

this is partly the reason for me being on the AD's now.

Have you tried the rapid return thingy? Explain to him that he's a big boy now and needs to spent the night in his own bed. Then if he does get up in teh night, you just take him straight back to his bed, put him in, say good night and go straight back to your bed EVERY time he gets up. It will probably take many times over several nights so pick your time to try (maybe a weekend?), but it may just work. Good luck.

that was my next thing to try tbh - a once and for all final thing, i've been so low lately that I've not had the energy to do it. which is bad for both of us. might have to wait until next weekend, as his dad has him this weekend.

nan today said to tell him father christams wouldn't know where to find him if he wasn't in his bed! lol.

x

have you looked at his nap times, bedtimes etc? is he having too much day sleep? going to bed too early?

failing that...

someone on here recommended fairy lights on a timer to encourage them to sleep for longer.

so you plug in the lights (can be a rocket or star shape or whatever you think will appeal to your ds, dd has a big ikea flower lamp) on a timer for whatever time you think. maybe set it for an hour on from his normal time at first, or just go for it and set it for 7am! you tell him over and over all day long that the fairies/spacemen etc will switch his light on when it's morning and he must wait for them to come. you may want to add in a special prize here for doing so. i didn't need to, dd was totally excited about the fairies anyway.

he doesn't nap, and tbh bed time is 7pm - sometimes he's not tired as much as others but I do try to be consistent about this one. we read some paddington etc and he drops off - for the most part him going ot sleep isn't the prob, the waking during the night is - I like th eidea of the lights thou.

I know MIL has got him one of those thomas torch/lamp thingys for xmas i'm hoping that might help?

yes go for it.

dh told someone at work about it who was complaining about their 3 year old waking at 4am. worked a treat!

hmm, ok off hunting then this weekend! lol.

where did you get the lights from, or are you meaning just plain fairy lights like on a xmas tree?

whatever you think your dc will like.

dd had the big ikea fairy wall lamp thing anyway so we just plugged that into a timer (ahem..the fairy telephone )

fairy lights would be fine obviously or even just a bog standard nightlight thing like you have maybe on the landing.

it maybe more exciting to take your dc out to choose one. you know him best. do whatever is most exciting.

Spandex, you have my utmost sympathy! My tiny terror's behaviour sounds just like your son's (she's also 2).

She goes to bed ok, but wakes anywhere from 11pm to midnight... and then the fun starts. My dh and I had both been quite ill recently, so we didn't have the strength to tackle the sneaking into bed at first, but last week we tried to tackle it. The first night she screamed and hollered until 3.30am in the morning but we stupidly (sorry, optimistically!) thought the next night would be better. Wrong! That night she "held out" until 4.30pm. No amount of calm "reasoning" or continually putting her back into bed worked.

Oh, and what supernanny, wonderwoman, all those perfectmums out there don't tell you is how to deal with little ones who are THAT strong willed. Plus very few seem to come up with good ways to tackle this behaviour when the tantruming tot shares a bedroom with her big (and very bad-tempered when woken) sis!

Anyway, sorry I digress. The light idea sounds good though. Please let us know if it works on your strong willed little one. Perhaps there really is light at the end of the tunnel('scuse feeble joke!)?

x

oh dear, and yes I know the feeling with a child THAT strong willed - poor DS has the worst bits of XH & I. stubborn, strong willed and independent - can't think where he gets is all from i'm sure! lol.

going to give the lights a try over the w.e - althou I got a job yesterday so i'm hoping (really hoping! lol) that 3 7 hour days in nursery will tire him out so much he won't come in with me??! lol. wishful thinking I think!

but will certainly tell you how I go - ho hum, off to ikea this week then!

How did it go Spandex?

Well done on the job by the way! Your little one should be knackered by the end of a full nursery day!

I didn't get there althou touch wood since I moaned again DS has been going until 5.30-6am in his own bed (yay!) and then coming in with me to doze so I don't mind that too much really esp as he's been settling right down next to me and going back to sleep straight away. it's when he messes about for 2 hours I get annoyed!

that seems encouraging Spandex! Really hope it continues and he no longer wakes in the far too early hours and fidgets like it's going out of fashion (my eldest is a great one for doing that too!).

Our little one is still waking in the early hours and wanting to sleep with mummy. Think we'll tackle it in the New Year - too much going on at the mo' and anyway, with any luck she may, just may (eyes raised pleadingly skywards) change her monkey ways and sleep all night in her own bed.

Good luck with the new job and hope it wears your little one out so he sleeps all night in his own bed.