co-sleeping - is it really risky?

[floradora]

Have just been told off by health visitor (grr)for letting 4 week old sleep in bed with us (she has had one night in Moses basket). I was under the impression there is no evidence cosleeping is dangerous, obvioulsy no drugs/heavy dringking etc, and neither of us smokes. I would ultimately like DD to sleep in her moses basket but she's been colicky and hard to settle so I'm happy to tackle one thing at a time and let her sleep in bed with me if she's happy and sleeps well there(she does!) Am i really putting her at risk? Lots of friends have coslept with babies..

Are you breastfeeding?

The NHS advice on this has changed, apparantly. They emphasised repeatedly at my antenatal classes that co-sleeping was highly risky and we should not do it under any circumstances. NHS Scotland leaflets and brochures are being updated to reflect this.

I was a bit about this as it will make breastfeeding harder... As a compromise I am investing in a bedside cot.

Not if done safely and correctly.

I personally felt it was a lot safer.

Co-sleeping is risky in some situations and not risky in others. Make yourself aware of the risks, mitigate them, and tell the HV to sod off thanks for the advice.

This is a good article with reference to co sleeping and breastfeeding

I've co-slept using a side crib attached to the bed with 12 wk old DD since she was born and it's saved my sanity. It makes breastfeeding much easier & feels lovely, although I have had problems because I now don't move at all when I'm asleep so do get a bit stiff. The rest of the world co-sleep!

However, you'll definitely get some people on this thread who know of their cousin's nephew who was smothered, i can't comment on that.

We coslept with dd for the first 6 months of her life. It was the most incredibly wonderful experience and meant we all slept really well as I could feed her and be asleep at the same time! Not once did I ever feel it was unsafe - of course we followed the guidelines and I would always be particularly firm about DH's behaviour (he rarely drinks but if he did I made sure it was very little). In many ways I think it really helped us all bond and I miss it now (she is 8mo). I would definitely do it again and will if we are fortunate enough to have another. I had to ignore many many people telling me it was unsafe - in my opinion a mother is so sensitive to her baby's needs she is very unlikely to let the bay come to any harm. Follow your instincts and go with the flow - your life will be much easier for it!

My ds never ever settled in his Moses basket so came in the bed with us through necessity. As the other posters said, just make yourself aware of the guidelines and you should be fine - worldwide most people sleep with their babies.

One thing we did was buy single duvets so ds could sleep in the middle of the bed and we were both still warm, but some advice says no duvets at all. We always felt we were very aware of where ds was - he slept in the crook of my arm when tiny and I wore a thick cardigan so my top half could be sticking out of the duvet - so no danger of smothering.

I don't have anything to do with my health visitors - some of their advice is so misguided I felt it safer to do my own research when making decisions about my baby's upbringing. Many of my friends find hv's useful but they just seem like interfering loons to me (no doubt with the best of intentions). When my hv visited I just fibbed and said ds slept in a Moses basket - it's none of their business.

By the way ds is now a thriving ten month old still happily sleeping alongside me

well, thanks for all the comments & advice - it's not necessarily an ideological thing for me, just a practical one - baby nods off and sleeps when in bed with me, and has tended to fight it when put down in Moses basket, although having said that last night she slept from about midnight to 6.30 in the basket (yay!) waking at 3.30 for a feed after which she went back to sleep pretty quickly in the basket again. Anyway, I will continue to listen to my instinct and my dd, and hopefully we'll carry on having reasonable amounts of sleep

My baby is the same reluctant to nod off in the basket although this is improving. I tend to put her down in the basket initially and then take her into bed later on after night feeds. Some nights she will not settle in the basket at all. I enjoy co-sleeping, which is probably why the baby is reluctant to nod off in the basket. But am not an ideological zealot about it. My HV also told me not to. I hvae read that sheets and blankets are statistically a lot safer than duvets for co-sleeping. also be careful that your baby can't get trapped between the bed and the wall, or can't fall out too easily (you could use a bed guard if you don't have a very big bed). Make your sure baby doesn't overheat, e.g. if she has a lot of layers on in a crib, may need less under adult covers. Try to frame your baby with your body if you can (you'll do this naturally if breastfeeding) arm above her, knees below. This is much safer than turning your back on her.