How can I get DS to self-settle for naps?

[SamJohnsMum]

DS (5 months) has just started settling himself to sleep at night (I have probably jinxed this now!) but will only nap in his cot during the day of he is fed to sleep (BF).

He does sometimes sleep in his pram when out and in his car seat without BF, but other than in his cot, the only other way he sleeps is on my lap when we're visiting and that's also after a BF.

He gets so ratty if he doesn't nap and I already think they are too short - he wakes up still grumpy after a short lunch time nap, for example.

Any suggestions?

Is he totally asleep when you bf him during day?
Could you feed him until he is practically asleep, then try putting him down drowsy. As he gets used to going down drowsy after a few days, put him down when he is less and less drowsy. So it is a gradual approach.
I wouldn't worry too much though, these things do just have a habit of falling into place. Good luck.
Or, just thinking, how is he self settling at night? Could that work (whatever it is!) for his daytime naps? Is it a routine? Do you put him down at the same time each day?

Have you got blackout blinds?

Yes, it is routine likessleep, or at least I think it is - usual bath, story, lullabies etc. Unfortunately, I don't put him down at exactly the same time every day because I am selfish and do different things every day. I do try and watch him for tired signals though, so I hope I catch the elusive sleep window where possible.

Becky - I do have a blackout blind, but it's rubbish - light comes over the top and round the sides. Pah! Do you think this is vital? Was thinking of getting a baa baa blind as at least then I could ensure it was flush to the wall.

Well I reckon if he can settle himself it's probably the light thats distracting him. It made a massive difference for my DD anyway. Before I blackened out her room she used just laugh at me when I put her down

I dont think going down at the same time matters but yeah watching for the sleep signals... My DD has just started doing really obvious eye rubbing which makes it nice and easy and if she hasnt shown any signs after two hours I put her down anyway.

I haven't got blackout blinds but I hang a black sheet over the cot from the thingy that holds the mobile. A bit like a birdcage .

How about establishing a mini-routine before the day time nap? I've done this with DD and it seems to work. We go upstairs, I draw curtains and get her into her sleeping bag. We then sit down and have a cuddle whilst I read a book to her (and she bashes the book). I then have her turned away from me, sitting on my lap, and I sing something like Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star. Then I'm quiet for a few minutes, then I put her in the cot with her bunny, say "night night" and off I go.

Sometimes she grumbles for a bit, other times she squeals, but she goes off to sleep eventually.

I'd second that tip about having a mini-routine before the daytime nap, but I also wonder how much of a problem feeding him to sleep really is.

I read so many things saying you had to put babies down 'drowsy but awake' so they learnt to settle themselves, otherwise they'd never sleep through the night, but I realised after a while that this was rubbish where we were concerned - my dd was perfectly capable of settling herself if she woke in the night (she would wail sometimes for up to 5 minutes but no more & then drop off again), but liked to have a feed before being put to bed. She still has a bottle before her nap and at bedtime (she's nearly 17 months now), although she's usually drowsy but not actually asleep by the end of it.

I think so many of the baby advice books end up making you think you've got problems when you haven't, really! Unless it's actually causing difficulties for you in some way, I'd bf him to sleep and not worry about it.