4 month old waking up more in the night

[Wigeon]

My 18 week old had got into a pattern of going to (deep) sleep around 9:30pm, waking up around 4am for a feed and going back to sleep until 8am / 9am. But for the last two weeks she's been waking up beween two and three times a night, and although we've tried just settling her, she always takes a good feed each time. (I'm breast-feeding).

She usually then goes back to sleep but sometimes has stayed awake (and happy) for quite a while (last night fed at 9:30am midnight, 4am and then was awake and perky from 4:30am to 6sm). I am completely knackered - had thought it was a growth spurt but it's been going on a fortnight now. As she's only a week over the minimum age for introduction of solids, I had been thinking it can't be time for weaning (had assumed when she was born I'd breast-feed exclusively until 6 months).

She usually has at least two naps in the daytime - about 45mins in the morning and a longer one in the afternoon.

I'm not desperate for her to sleep through (although that would be nice!) as one night feed was manageable.

Help! Any advice on how we can get a bit more sleep would be gratefully received!

I'd say she needs to be sleeping for longer during the day... But if she's feeding in the night too it sounds like maybe she's not getting enough during the day? Or maybe you're just very unlucky and this is a very long growth spurt... I have heard people on hear say it can go on for weeks Good luck with it

Our four-month growth spurt was at least three (painful) weeks! But don't listen to me as my DD is six months old and we've had ONE night with only one waking. ONE.

Our DD did this at around 4 months - it coincided with her being much more distracted during feeding in the daytime. I think she just wasn't getting enough milk and so woke at night to make up for it. It slowly got better.... until she got a cold, then started a bit of teething... and then she started to sleep through just before we started weaning.

And now we've started weaning, she's stopped sleeping through. Great!

Thanks everyone - really reassuring to have some ideas (and sympathy!).

Becky77 - thanks - that's useful - I've been trying to feed her today at any slight sign of hunger so fingers crossed for tonight

OMaLittle - here's hoping your DD eventually gets onto sleeping through and in some ways I'm reassured that growth spurts can last for weeks...!

VeryHungryKatypillar - I guess this is just parenthood then!

If anyone else has any experience to share then feel free!

At that age, DS was having at least 3 naps a day. Doesn't mean your DD needs to too, though. I agree that the growth spurt can last a good while and sticking to exclusive breastfeeding will save you a lot of hassle. DS wasn't ready for solids until at least 9 months, wish I'd listened. Development really upsets the sleep of a lot of babies. She's probably a bit young for sitting up and commando crawling, but I bet she's into the oral fixation/exploration phase and is discovering all the exciting things the world has to offer.

Thanks ches - actually she did roll from back to front (in the day, not night!) for the first time, a week into the waking up phase, and has since rolled over a couple more times - can this kind of development wreak havoc on the sleeping then?

Think I've got the same problem. DD is 16 weeks and from birth was an absolute star sleeping 6 or 7 hours, then at least 2 more after a feed.

Now she wakes after about 3 hours and then about every hour after that. This coincided with moving her bedtime earlier - to make it a good time for her, not our bedtime as it had been before, and trying her in the big cot. She is now back in the moses basket (which can't last long), and going to bed at 8 meaning that the sleeplessness starts about when I go to bed.

I end up breastfeeding her back to sleep every waking. Is this crazy? Is it going to get better?

Agree with a couple of other posters. At that age my boys were also put down for three naps a day. And I would find that if they missed the last one they fell asleep to heavily at 7pm and then would have a more disturbed night.
It also might be time to experiment with grobags to restrict her movement a bit and also a bit more of a wind-down routine and for considering how her room is set up. It may be that she's becoming more aware of her surroundings and that's interfering with her settling herself.

I don't know about the original poster but in my case I try to give her naps about every 2 hours as that seems tp be all she can last, but unless she is in the sling she always wakes after half an hour - as she has just done. DH off work today is walking her about trying to get her to sleep again. She can't settle herself, and I don't really know how to get her to. She naps in her bouncy chair as if I put her in bed she lasts even less time.

She has her moses basket in her cot in our room. Can't have her own room as we are in a tiny one bedroom flat.

She will only sleep from breastfeeding or rocking - usually rocking for naps and feeding at night. At night she is in a grobag, but in the day she just has a blanket over her.

How do I get her to nap longer?

Yes, maybe she's not sleeping enough in the day. We have very recently started trying a bit more of an Official Bedtime Routine so it sounds from people's experience that that might help too. (she is in a grobag already).

She actually slept from 8:45pm to 2:30pm last night - a 5 hour stretch - horray! Although then was awake and chatty from 6am to 7am...

Hello Fabiabi and welcome to the "what do I do with my 4 month old" club! I'd also welcome advice on how to actually get them to nap more - my DD seems to be either awake, or asleep, and getting her to be in one state when she's in the other is hard!

Hi all - can I join the '4 month club'?! DS's sleep has got worse over the last few weeks. We used to get 3 or 4 hours at a stretch each night, but this has gone badly wrong.

This week has been 8ish to bed, wake up 10ish, sleep until 12.30 ish, feed then 2ish wake up. Wake up ever hour from then. This is so draining!

I'm starting from today being more rigid with daytime naps. Making him have 3 today, even if this means him screaming himself to sleep in his cot. I think the problem is that I've never taught him to go to sleep on his own, and so he relies on my company/bf to go to sleep (I've always let him sleep downstairs on my lap in the day or bring him out for walk/drive to get to sleep). Not sure if this will work, but fingers crossed

Well it is nice to know others are going through the same thing - not that I would wish sleeplessness on anyone!

I've just had a bit of a minor breakdown - thought I'd better make sure of a longer nap than her usual 30 mins so headed off to the park and walked and walked, she took ages to drop off then woke after the usual half and hour with us miles from home! Arived home in tears - so now dh is caring for the baby and I'm off to bed. Need to learn how to make her nap, and as you say allnew this self settling might need to be sorted.

4 months is notorious for this. it's totally normal. they have a big growth spurt at this time. a lot of mums start solids at this time becuase of it but they really aren't needed yet.

Fabiabi sympathies, don't blame you for crying. DS's first nap today was 30 mins (after 30 mins screaming), then his second was 1.5 hours. His late afternoon one was 30 mins (again after 30 mins screaming). I feel v cruel

Thank you. Pathetic really. Am going to try to be calm from now on. She really picked up on my feelings and went a bit sad and silent. Don't want to do that to her again.

Feeling her gums it seems there is a tooth pushing through so that might be part of it. Going to be organised about naps tomorrow too. And am trying to remember its just a phase, and so good to be told its normal.

Can I join in?

My DS hasn't had a great sleep record so far - but it's what I expect from a baby, so no biggie. However for the last week (he was 16weeks last Sunday) he has been waking up at least twice a night and on at least one of those wake-ups he stays awake for ~1.5 hours!!

He's not hungry, just awake. Sometimes he spends the whole time crying, sometimes he is just wide-awake but i can't just go back to bed and leave him to go back to sleep because he does usually end up crying at some point - usually just as I start dropping off

Even feeding him back to sleep doesn't always work any more, which is a swizz.

Talking to my other NCT ladies today - all of their babies are doing the same thing - so it is clearly a bit of a 16 week(ish) trend and I guess we just have to ride it out!!

Good luck for tonight.

Omigod I can't believe it. Last night she slept for 6.5 hours! Hooray. She then went to sleep again after a feed, but then soon woke again and was awake for about 1.5 hours in all, but then slept through till 7.30! I am so happy. Not going to get complacent though cos she might well be back to every hour tonight, but it was great. Of course I was awake half the time thinking she was about to wake, but there you go!

It might just be a good blip, but the only thing I did yesterday - apart from trying and failing to get her better naps - was to feed her a lot more in the day hoping to fill her up in daytime rather than at night. Oh and we gave her some teething powders before bed too, that might have done some good too.

Just hope she's over this 4 month thing now - she actually only turns 16 weeks today, so I really am probably speaking too soon!

I just want DS to nap during the day.

Fabiabi at 6.5 hours! That's great though, I'm sure you feel a bit better with the sleep

Hi 5gomad! A has just gone off for his early afternoon nap (15 mins screaming this time, which is an improvement!)

Tallbird sorry to hear you're going through the same, but it is good to hear that it's a common 16 week problem! After sticking rigidly to daytime naps yesterday, I was hoping DS would sleep better, but we also had about 1.5 hours of him being wide awake - think it was around 3am-ish but it's all a bit of a blur!

My DD is about 4.25 months and she is doing the same thing. Like allnew's DS, she has never been a great sleeper (3-4 hours at night and 30 minute cat naps), but this past week it's been 2 hour stretches, with some nights waking over and over again every 30-45 minutes. The worst is when she wakes up at 1 AM and is WIDE AWAKE until 4 AM. We tried to just leave her alone (she isn't very upset - just babbling and cranking a little), but that will go on for hours until I give up and pick her up and put her back down (rocking).

I'm curious if your babies have regular wake-up and sleeping times? My baby is very irregular - overall - sleeping times, poop times, etc. I'm wondering if maybe that is a developmental thing which happens faster in some babies than others?

I also suspect that daylight savings messed things up a bit...

We are in exactly the same situation. Our son was going to bed around 7pm and waking once or twice for a feed but going straight back to bed and sleeping until 6am or 7am. But for the last three nights he's been waking at 10.30pm and then pretty much waking up every hour or so after that crying. He's immediately consoled if we pick him up but if we rock him to sleep and then try to put him back in his cot he wakes up and cries straight away. I wondered if it was teething as he has had red cheeks. We've given him calpol but that hasn't made any difference. I feel I'm at my wit's end and am really starting to resent my baby which is making me feel terribly guilty as I know he's lovely really. Have also been very tearful because of the sleep deprivation - so do other mums think this is a growth spurt then and I just have to wait it out? Any advice would be gratefully received.

I'd like to join the 4 month old sleepless-nights club too

My boy is 16 weeks tomorrow (so technically not quite 4 months yet) & his sleep has been going from bad to worse!! I do pay attention to daytime naps, I make sure he sleeps after 2 hours of awake time, & he's usually a relatively good napper- goes off to sleep on his own in his cot (or in the pram)... but then he usually sleeps 45' tops, so I'd love some advice on how to extend naps!

And then at night time... every night is an adventure!! We have a standard bed time at 7.00 pm & a bath-feed-sleep routine before, so that's been working well. But recently he's more & more unsettled, waking almost hourly until we give in & take him in our bed. And then magically the fussing stops & he sleeps . We're hoping to move him to his own room soon & use a monitor, just because we do need some space for ourselves, & also with the hope that he will sleep more undisturbed (yeah right). But right now almost every night he ends up between us in bed, so that all 3 of us can get some much needed sleep...

Can I join in as well please?

My little boy goes down at 6.30 but wakes at around 9.30. We feed him and put him back in cot but he's wide awake and will stay like that for hours. Sometimes he's quite happy but quite quickly he can get bored and then upset. We too are bringing him into bed so we can get some sleep. He's 20 weeks old.

Jojo- welcome to the thread We should keep this thread going because it seems there are many of us with 4/5-month-olds not sleeping! hoping your little boy got a couple of better nights since you wrote on saturday?

Just thought i'd revive this thread as I'm having problems with my 4.5 month old DS who can't seem to settle at bedtime and wakes up at least 2-3 times in the night! is anyone having any success? what are you all trying?