Will not sleep in his cot.

[leander]

My 13 mth ds has gone from being a model baby to a monster almost overnight.He has always gone to bed awake and mostly slept through the night, he always woke early between 5 + 6 but i could cope with this as he used to have 2 good naps through the day and I too would have a nap at the same time.For the last week or so he screams hysterically as soon as he is put in his cot even though he is tired,even if he falls asleep on me he starts to scream as soon as i put him in his cot.I have tried leaving him to cry but he just wont stop,I am exhausted and just dont know what to do please help.

leander, we are going through something similar with our 13 month ds, but in his case I think it is because he has been quite ill, and has had three teeth (2 molars poor baby) coming through at the same time. We also had a night in hospital last week, so his sleeping pattern is all over the place, and if we do eventually get him to sleep in his cot he will wake up in the night and need to come in with us.
Sorry for rambling, but has your ds been ill at all? or is he teething?
I agree it's very tiring going from a perfect sleeping baby to this, so I'm hoping that I can get him back to his normal pattern, but like you am at a loss at the moment as to what to do, as he can scream hysterically for ages, and I just haven't been able to leave him to cry it out yet.

Hi whellid, yes my ds was sick last week he had v+d and was quite poorly.He is in his cot now, I know he is tired he has been up since 6am but he is fighting it, he has been screaming for over 1/2 hr but i think that itis not worth going up now as i have left it this long,but then again its tearing me apart listening to him ,I know he is ok ,but should i go up to him anyway?

We moved our DS into a toddler bed at 14 months as he was like this (and could climb out too). The difference was miraculous - straight away he was happy to climb into his own bed, snuggle under his duvet, and go to sleep on his own, rahter than having to be put into the cot once he was already asleep. He started sleeping through too (or perhaps resettling himself, I don't know), rather than screaming if he woke during the night. I'm not saying that it's necessarily the right solution for everyone, but for us it definately worked.

My ds (20mths) has only slept through the night a handful of times which is very frustrating and exhausting as we both work fulltime, but i think we're quite used to it now!! I don't have any constructive advice for you I'm afraid..... but I do sympathise with your exhaustion. And I'm interested to hear the advice you receive from mums who have found a technique that works!

Perhaps it's just a phase like so many things are with babies. Just keep trying and hopefully soon he'll just settle and surprise you. In the meantime.... Good luck!!!!

Just to say moving our ds into a single bed at 12 months worked for us, he was much happier getting into bed and began to sleep better too.
We just kept the upper stair gate closed and listened on the intercom. I've never worked out why he disliked his cot so much, can only think it was the 'bars'.

Hi Leander, we had really bad v&d as well and Ds is taking his time getting over it. For his naps I've let him sleep on me or dh for the past few days which is just avoiding the problem.

GillW and fidget - we have a cot bed, but ds moves about in his sleep so much that I'd be scared to put him into a bed just yet. Did you have much trouble with falling out?

I'm still sure it's a phase bought about by being ill, and so have my fingers crossed that it won't last long.

whellid - ds has never yet managed to fall out of his bed. We have the bed against the wall which takes care of one side, it has both head and foot boards, and we have a guard rail on the other side which takes up all but 18 inches of the length.

Thanks GillW I had forgotten about getting the side rail - been a long day!
We're in the middle of another battle to go to sleep in the cot. Dh has just read to ds for 30 mins, but he is still screaming. I hate this bit. I know he's tired, and pre-illness would be happily asleep by now, or lying quietly.

leander - how did you get on last night? was it any better?
My ds took about an hour to settle and then slept through till 6, so getting better. We're away at the weekend, so really need this to be sorted before then, but I don't hold out much help.

Can i join in ? I was just about to post a new thread and found this.
I don't have any advice-just need to vent my frustration at a perfect sleeper going bad! My ds2 is 20 months and was also a model sleeper (apart from early mornings) till now. He would go into his cot for his nap and at night with no problem and could be left quite happily till he fell asleep. Since an ear infection a month ago dh or I have to sit in his room or just outside his open door till he falls asleep - which seems to take forever. He also wakes every night crying until we go and bring him into bed with us. If we don't he hurls himself out the cot. Am loath to get him into a bed because a)we haven't even started sorting our spare room into a bedroom for him as DS1 was 2 1/2 before we put him into a bed and i assumed (obviously wrongly!) that ds2 would be around the same age. and b) because he is a strong willed little monkey and I am sure he won't stay in it.

My dd is almost 2 and has always been a bad sleeper. After months of putting her down in her cot and picking her up and taking her into bed with me, I decided just to put her down in my bed. I'm still having to wait for her to fall asleep before putting her down, and it's often as late as 11pm, but she sleeps through - which she has only ever done a handful of times before.

Fwiw, I love co-sleeping and would do it form the start with any subsequent babies, but I know it's not for everyone. If you are considering it I would strongly recommend reading Three in a Bed by Deborah Jackson. It is really inspiring and reassuring.

Meant to say I've heard lots of people say that their little ones sleep better in their own bed than in a cot.

I've heard that too Anais, but was just lucky with ds - until now. He has slept much better when in with us, but I don't. I like the idea of co-sleeping, but ds likes to sleep with his hand under my head and I'm a really fidgety sleeper.
ShellyB - it's amazing how much an illness throws them off isn't it. Ds is also playing up with his food, which again he's not done before. Could all be coincidence of course, but with a bump on the head, a night in hospital, 3 teeth coming through and d&v all in the same week it's not surprising I suppose.
Saying all that last night was so much better. A half hour story from dh and ds whimpered for 5 minutes and fell asleep. It was because he'd had an interrupted afternoon nap and was really tired, but I'll take anything I can!

whellid, it was anightmare the other day, I put him down for his nap and he screamed, I decided to leave him to cry and it ended up being an hour and a half(nasty mummy)but i kept thinking I've left him this long he will go off in a munute but he never so up I went and lay on our bed with him and he went out like a light.I've decided to put him in a bed this weekend and see how it goes,He stayed in nanny+ grandads last night and was the same he just doesn't like being on his own!!but I had a lovely nights sleep and a long lie in so i am ready for anything now.

leander-have you put him in a bed yet ? would love to know how you get on. I'm definitely thinking about this as the only option for my monkey. nothing else seems to work and it is wearing me out - plus his waking in the night has got earlier and earlier. Last night i hadn't even got undressed for bed yet (and believe me I don't go to bed late) and he was awake and crying. dh had to sit with him while i brushed by teeth and could get into the spare bed with him. When we were taking him into our bed neither dh or i were getting a good nights sleep as ds is a wriggler. Now we are taking nightly turns in the spare bed with ds (more room) and we both sleep better. however it's not really conducive to a good marriage especially now we're not even starting the night in the same bed !

Hi, I have an 8 1/2 month old little girl. She has always been the BEST sleeper!!! She slept through from 6 weeks, loved her cot and could get herself to sleep without any problem whatsoever! We moved 2 months ago, and mu husband was away for 2 weeks and since then she has been a nightmare!!! I just cant work it out she has gone from one extreme to the other!!!!
She has a dummy, and if that falls out then she will scream for it, but lately she stands up and screams for us. In fact, as soon as she sees it she screams!!!
We tried moving the cot back into our room, and she slept through although we had to get her well and truly to sleep before we put her down. If she woke up we were in trouble!! But as soon as we take her into our bed, she goes to sleep straight away!! I know we shouldnt do this, but its so exhausting, and I'll do anything for a decent nights sleep! I just dont understand why she has gone from one extreme to the other. even if i just put her in it while I get some clothes out her wardrobe she goes loopy! I worry about leaving her to cry because she stands up in her cot and gets so worked up that she just keeps falling over backwards and hitting her head.. she has bruised herself on more than one occasion!!!! She has naps during the day, she has a play pen and she will just go to sleep in there with no problem whatsoever. The pushchair is even better. I only have to sit her in ti while we get out stuff together to go out and shes gone in seconds!!! I dont know what to do. I think she will be much better once shes in her own bed because she loves the cosiness of it, but obviously its too early for that so Im stuck as to what to do. I want my bed back!!!!! Sorry I cant give u guys any advice!!