16month old won't sleep and night terrors

[butterscotch]

My daughter is 16months old and won't sleep without being cuddled to sleep, we have tried controlled crying (last nights attempt she was sick after 20seconds), we have tried the pick up put down method, again gets into a state and ends up being sick, likewise with the gradual withdraw.
The problems started when she was 4/5 months old and had a chest/ear/throat infection, before this time she self settled for naps and night-time sleep and slept 12-14hrs without an issue.
We have tried dropping daytime naps, sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't! Now I have returned to work we need to find a solution, we have night wakings (I think night terrors) sometimes hrly or 2hrly!
HELP wise mumsnetters..........

thanks

We have the same problem. DD slept fine until a night in hospital at 7 months. We tried everything, now she sleeps with us and cuddles when she feels like it. Is now 26 months and we get much more sleep. Is that an option?

We have and do co-sleep when we have to but she fidgets and kicks all night we don't sleep as well

True, but we feel that fidgetting and kicking is still better than having to get up. Somewhere must be these ideal toddlers who sleep like little logs and don;t disturb anyone!

we have had a period of similar disturbed sleep with DD. She is 16 months has had disturbed sleep for the past 4/5 months, night terrors and waking at random hours being so hard to settle. Also tried pick up put down, amongdt others but nothing really seemed to have any impact. On really bad nights I took her into spare bed to co sleep, not enough space in our bed for us all to get any sleep. I was worried anout her getting into bad habits and waking ecpectong someone to come amd get her but at times it seemed to be the only option. On bad nights it was just so exhausting, the continual getting up and down, 'giving in' seemed the only way to get some much needed sleep.

However for the last 4 , count em, nights she has slept through

I do remember reading about a sleep expert woman... Grace something? Couldn't afford to buy her services but I found her website really interesting, some video clips with helpful advice.
hope someone comes along soon who can offer more practical help.
No real advice

I still cuddle my 19 mth old to sleep - he still needs it. We co-sleep most of the night as it's quite lovely and also the only way I can get enough sleep and work full-time. He goes to sleep in his cot, side off, pushed up to our bed, and comes in with us once we're in bed and he wakes up. He never self-settled to sleep, not even as a tiny baby, and he still wakes up at least twice before we go to bed, plus at least twice after. I hear of these babies/toddlers who sleep through the night, but I just don't have one and TBH there's nothing that I can do about it that I don't feel is just plain mean. We have a good bedtime routine, he likes going to bed, he likes sleeping, but he's not very good at staying asleep. He is very advanced in other areas (wearing 3yo clothes, for instance) so it's understandable that he's "behind" on sleep.

There are a few things that come to mind about 16 months; is she still in a cot? It might be feeling confining to her rather than comfortable, so you could try a toddler bed. Where is she at with teething? DS started getting his first molars at 16 mth and it was two-three months of sheer hell at bedtime/waking up screaming. Is she still going through some separation anxiety? It shouldn't last much longer.

I really don't think dropping daytime naps is a good idea at all. By all accounts most children need them until they're 3/4 and good naps = good nights. Over-tiredness makes it harder to fall asleep, not easier.

You can try to wean her off being cuddled to sleep. You can move from cuddling to stroking her back, then a hand on her back, then sitting in the room, then sitting in the hall, etc.