How to get DD to sleep more than 10 hours

[sarahsmummy]

Before I start, I know lots of people don't have a child who sleeps 10 hours in a stretch so I'm not whinging but DD (20 months) took around 18 months to get to the stage of sleeping through the night and now she does fairly regularly, but very rarely for more than 10 hours.

This means she's asleep between 7.30 and 8, and then awake between 5.30 and 6. When she wakes up she wants to be up and about straight away, even though she still looks tired (dark circles) and continues to yawn. She still has one nap after lunch of 1.5 to 2 hours - I've tried cutting this down a bit but she's really unhappy if we wake her from the nap and will be inconsolable for up to half an hour.

If we go out in the car in the mornings, say around 9.30, she often falls asleep if it's more than a 15min journey which suggests to me that she could do with a bit extra sleep in the mornings, but I don't know how to encourage this?

Puttng Ds to bed but will be back. He was just the same, now 3.3.

Similar position here. ATM ds2 goes to bed about 9pm, as the most he will sleep at a stretch is 9h. By 9pm he is frantic with tiredness, but I can cope with 6am starts - I can't cope with 5am starts. Now that it's dark later, I'm soon going to bite the bullet and put him down at 7ish, then tough out the consequent waking at 4am. I'll do the same sort of comforting that I did to get him sleeping through, and, hopefully, he will go down again and learn to stay down for a full night.

Cutting out naps doesn't help, IME. But I never let him sleep later than 4pm, no matter what time he fell asleep.

Oh to have my evenings back!

sarahsmummy her sleeping pattern is in my opinion fine -shes sleeping almost 12 hours a day which is good although i suspect it wont last much longer a 2 hour nap at 20 months is a fair old sleep midday,perhaps you could limit her daytime nap and split it so she goes to bed later and has a nap mid morning and early afternoon.

my eldest 2 sons now aged 12 and 15 had a v strict bedtime 8.30pm - 6.30/7am then they slept 12-1pm it worked well for us.

put her to ed later then she wont get up so early....think your self lucky she sleeps 10 hours imo

my dd dropped her daytime nap (unless in car at about 20 months...then slept 13 hrs at night

she is 3 now an still does

My approach would be to not get her up tbh. Get her a bottle but "it is night-time and remains so until 6:30" (say). Both my dss did this - with the eldest it lasted 5 weeks or so (was knackered). With ds2 the killer part was that he woke his brother (they share). But we did get through it. I would make sure her nap didn't go past 3:15 too.

Could you set a timer on a lamp to come on at 7am and explain that she is not to get out of bed/out of her room until the lamp comes on? Put a gate on her door. She can always play on her own till 7am.

Why post 'just be grateful you are getting 10 hours'... the OP already said she knows that she is getting it pretty good already so why make her feel bad for wanting more.

Thanks Neenztwinz - I've held off posting for a while because I know it's better than for many, but I have had 18 months of being up 1 or 2 hours most nights too!

Thanks to all for the other suggestions. She doesn't just wake up and want to be up and about, she's standing up in her cot and immediately crying (very loudly!) for us. A couple of times I have managed to get her to go back to sleep in my arms, but only a couple and although I would much prefer her to sleep a little longer, it is mainly a concern as I do think she could do with a bit more sleep and I'm conscious that she hasn't got good sleep habits established.

Is she ready for a bed? Then she can get up and play with her toys. Maybe use rewards eg stickers if she stays in her room and plays. Maybe too young for this though? Hope it improves for you soon. I for one do not think you should just 'think yourself lucky'. Getting up at 5am is IMO sleep deprivation!!

Have you tried delaying her bed time? You say she goes down between 7.30 and 8 - try 8.15 for a few days and then 8.30 and see if that makes any difference.

I sympathise greatly as I do remember DS doing the 5am starts. It is horrendous. Esp in winter.

Don't move her to a bed yet. It will only make the problm worse. 20m is too young to be left alone and at liberty with the rest of the household asleep.

Does she ever play in her room during the day? Ds2 also cries and wants out immedately he wakes, whereas ds1 and dd would play in their cots when they woke. I'm sure the difference is that, in the flat where we used to live before ds2 was born, the LOs and I played in their bedroom a lot. Here we have a playroom downstairs and a garden, and spend very little time upstars during the daytime, so I'm sure that ds2 doesn't see his cot as a familiar playspace, but only as a sleeping place - so of course he wants out when he's awake.

Going against the grain here, but it did, quite oddly, work for us - we started putting dd down a wee bit earlier - in bed by 7, say, and she started sleeping longer - she's 23 months now. Have no idea why, and it could be coincidental, but it's something Elizabeth Pantley mentions in the No-Cry Sleep Solution. It seems to defy logic, but she now sleeps 11-12 hours at night and anything from 1.5 - 3.5 hours in the day (which feels miraculous, after what seems like a lifetime of tiny naps and 5am wakes...). I do hope it gets better - early starts plus fractious child is not much fun. Otherwise, I second the suggestion of trying to get a morning nap in - might suit her better.

Sorry to veer off the point slightly, but how did you get your dd sleeping through?

I second the idea of putting down earlier, mad though it seems. DS, now 2.6, is a 5-530 waker and we have accepted that is just him. DH and I were apparently just the same as tinies. He gave up his day sleeps (at home, at any rate) at 18m. He will ,very occasionally, drop off in the pushchair if completely shattered. I don't let him have more than about 45 mins and not after 3pm. So he now goes to bed anytime between 530 and 645 (depending how tired he is) and wakes up ready to bounce. If we put him to bed later, he wakes at the same time, but cross and tired. It is easier for us in that he is very happy to self-entertain, for up to an hour, but this prob comes with time (and also not being too tired)