11 weeks old sleeps on his tummy.please tell me we are not the only one

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my 11 weeks ds has never been a good sleeper.we have tried co-sleeping,puttihg him on his side but nothing worked-he kept waking up every hour.the only way he will settle is if I put him on his tummy-last night he slept throught for the first time.last week I mentioned to my health visitor that he would not sleep unless on tummy and she said no,no.advise me to do PUPD wich I did yesterday but no results.we ended up with no sleep at all during the day.so at night I could not face the same and put him on tummy-he is stil asleep now.what should I do?he is very young,but very strong and can easily move his head left and right,also I have one of those breathing monitors.anyone else who lets his baby sleep on his front,please reply!

Not the only one! My DS2 (21 weeks) has been like this since birth. We spent a miserable couple of weeks trying to get him sleeping on his back - swaddling, co-sleeping etc. - and had a LOT of screaming and a very unhappy baby. So, like you, we bought a breathing monitor, and he has been sleeping on his tummy ever since. All naps are in the cot with the monitor on or on me in the sling, so I feel as reassured as I can be.

I discussed it with hv/mw etc, and although they had to give me the correct SIDS information, which is to put them down on their backs, they pointed out that this was only one factor in SIDS, and that if no other factors were present (i.e. we didn't let him get too hot, weren't smokers etc) then he was very low risk. That plus the monitor did it for me, and it has been absolutely fine. The monitor is very sensitive and has gone off a few times (with DS2 being fine and blisssfully aware each time!) which is heart-stopping but reassuring at the same time, iyswim.

Like your DS, my DS2 was very strong from a young age, and held his head up well ridiculously early - maybe it's connected to this preference for tummy sleeping, who knows?

I was frantic about this, but decided there was no point in fighting such a strong natural preference if I could make him safe to my satisfaction, and he is much happier and more settled now - and I feel bad for giving him such a miserable start by battling with him...

Hope this helps!

I always remember my friend having this problem, she too was told NO NO NO by HV etc.

I said to her "I wonder if the HV would follow her own advice if her DC was up all night because they were uncomfortable?".

I lent her my baby monitor with the pad under the mattress and she was more reassured.

He will be fine, I know you think you should follow all guidelines to the letter (and rightly so if it is dangerous not to) but all babies need different care and if your son is happier on his front, leave him be.

thanks,that is very reassuring

DD2, 12 weeks, also sleeps on her front. we too have a breathing monitor and she sleeps in a grobag.

I tried swaddling, back, side, co-sleeping etc, all of which resulted in screaming and no sleep. So in the end I gave in and put her on her front. She will stay in the room with me until 6mths or/and until she can roll over on her own.

Both mine slept on their back until they could roll over - I did once suggest to dh we try ds (world's worst sleeper) we tried him on the front but he talked me out of it. BUT I have a good friend who is a paediatrician - her son was a terrible sleeper until she put him on his front in desperation one night. She reasoned that with a baby monitor, no-one smoking around him, making sure he was well and not over-wrapped, and in the same room as them at all times, she had eliminated as many risk factors as possible, and therefore would take a chance on that. If we ever were in that situation again, I might be tempted to give it a go.

My dd1 was like that, I never used a breathing monitor, but eliminated as many risks as possible. She still does now.

Tbh, go with your gut instinct, they are all different.

dd3 (almost 12 weeks) now sleeps all of her daytime naps on her front - she is downstairs with me and I frequently check her (ie give her a poke!)

in the evening she always nods off at about 8-8.30, after a few weeks of putting her on her front and her repeatedly 'waking herself' til 11ish we now put her on her front at 8ish (when she is asleep) then quickly flip her onto her back when we take her upstairs at 10.30 or so. She still sleeps through til 4.30am (or 5.50am the other night).

I still worry though, am very tempted by a breathing monitor as mentioned - where do you get them from?

Mine is a tommee tippee baby monitor with a "sensormat" that goes under the mattress. I got it from Argos a couple of years ago when DD1 was wee.

both of mine slept on their tummies from birth. Both are fine. Like the previuos posters I did my own risk asessment and decided I was happy with the arrangement. A brazilian mum at my dd's school says in Brazil everyone puts their babies to sleep on their fronts as we did in this country not so long ago.

thanks baltimore, I will have a look now.

Both my Dc's have always slept on their front from birth, as did I up until pg. I have a breathing monitor for my Dd, but didn't for Ds. I must admit, it makes you feel better having it on.

my dd is now 10 months old and has slept on her tummy since about 5 weeks old. my health visitor said "no, she will DIE " so i cried and for 2 nights tried putting her on her back. she cried and i though I would die! so back on her tummy she went and slept well - she's perfectly fine and is incredibly strong, pushing up and rolling over at very early age.

You have to find something that works, and that you can cope with, if it's tummy sleeping and you aren't going to beat yourself up about the risks, then so be it.

good luck

Another post of reassurance I hope, my best friend always put both her DS's to sleep on their tummy's and now aged 4 and 2 they still both like that position. I second the other posters, follow your instinct and listen to what your babe is telling you, then do anything you feel is necessary to reassure yourself, not too hot, monitor etc.. Incidentally, in his Attachment parenting book, Sears writes about some of his research that suggests SIDS being associated with very deep sleepers, and babies who don't wake frequently to feed.hope this helps

both my dds slept on tummies from day one
they just seem to be more comfortable and relaxed. it seems more natural.

The advice is all correct that if you eliminate all the other risk factors then the risks of sleeping on the front are very low but they are still the biggest risk to SIDS. The advice to put the babies on their backs was introduced in 1991 and the number of cot deaths fell immediately from 1500 a year in the UK to 350 a year and those levels have been maintained, throughout the world. Also, there are no countries, including brazil which don't advise putting babies on their backs. As a parent, one always needs to consider what works for them and if your baby has no other risk factors sleeping on the front is probably ok and only you know if it's a risk you are happy to take, One thing I will say is that there is absolutely no evidence that a monitor reduces the risk of cot death. It reassures the parent that the baby is still breathing but it will not prevent a death. I work in SIDS education so am completely up to date on current advice and research.

Two out of my 6 have been tummy sleepers. There is no swaying them, they both loved it and is the only way they would settle.

They have both loved their bed for a sleep in the day too, a pushchair will not cut it! I had to get prams with both of them so they would sttle if i was out for any length of time. The youngest is 14mths and still sleeps more soundly on his tummy in bed.

Do you have a pram?