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At my wits end with 3yo sleep

1 reply

alittleconfused1 · 14/04/2026 08:13

I am at my wits end with my (just turned) 3yo's sleep.

We moved from cot to a single bed approx 3 months ago. Initially she slept well. She has always been low sleep needs and before the move had approx 11 - 11 1/2 hours a night. She hasn't napped since she was 26 months.

She kept waking up crazy early, so we got a Gro clock and that worked pretty well for a while, now she ignores it. Then for about a month she refused to wee in her nappy at night, so was up several times a night to wee in the potty, and then the last wee of the night (usually around 4am) she didn't go back to sleep and was wide awake and ready for the day.

The last week she has returned to wee'ing in her nappy, but still waking up INSANELY early and being ready for the day.

When she wakes, if it is before 4.30am I sit with her until she goes back to sleep. If it's after 4.30am it's unlikely she will go back to sleep so I lie on the floor next to her bed until the Gro clock lights up. She rarely goes back to sleep and just messes around and sings etc. I have tried leaving her with her Yoto but she just keeps coming out of her room.

She sleeps with a blackout blind, the heating on, low white noise. I restrict fluids before bed but she has a small (4oz) milk. She is back in sleeping bags as wasn't keeping duvet on and that was making her cold. So I have eliminated light, noise, cold, I have experimented with large teas and smaller teas but have no real change.

I have tried napping her in case overtired, she tends to go to bed later but still get up early, so typically then gets even less sleep in 24 hours than a no nap day.

I have tried explaining we need more sleep. I have tried getting cross. I have tried saying Mummy needs her help etc. Nothing works.

She goes to bed on a no nap day between 6.30 and 7. On a nap day it's between 7.30 and 8.15 before she is asleep.

Last night she went to bed at 7, ironically she had had a good night the night before and slept 7-6 without a wake up, so she can do it. Nothing was different last night but she went to bed at 7, was up crying at 8 (fine I think it was a bad dream), came into our room at 12 wide awake, didn't need a wee (thought she might), took her back to bed and she was asleep after about 15, then into my room lights on at 4.30ish and despite us both lying in the dark until 5.45 she was WIDE AWAKE and was singing and messing around etc etc. All the while yawning.

She looks awful. She is really tired most of the time yawning. I am miserable and exhausted and really intolerant of her because I am so tired, which makes me a terrible mum. I just don't know how to fix it. I have always had terrible sleep anxiety and this is bringing it back. I struggle to sleep as I am constantly waiting for her to wake up - crazy I know but I can't help it.

Has anyone experience this and got any tips? I am so despairing. Thank you so much xx

OP posts:
katieelson · 14/04/2026 12:04

This is really common at this age and at this time of year! Is your black out completely black out?? If there is any light coming in around the edges - block it out! The Gro clock is actually a really useful tool, you could perhaps offer some rewards if she can stay in bed until it goes yellow. Also rather than laying with her I would do check-ins instead. 'I'll be back in 5 minutes if you can lay quietly'. I actually have loads of tips on this as I'm a Sleep Consultant! Happy to chat more on a free 15 minute call, no pressure just happy to help.

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