Advice needed for ten month old with severe sleep difficulties

[CheeryPinkShark]

I’m just looking for advice as me and my partner are starting to look like zombies!
Our youngest is 10 months old, and she has never been a great sleeper since birth. However since around 5 months old things have gotten worse. She refuses to nap during the day, I have tried and tried but it just creates a screaming match to the point she is reaching to be sick. By 7pm she is absolutely shattered (I don’t blame her) and will eventually go to sleep. She will then wake back up at 11pm and will be awake until around 1.30am, she will then fall back to sleep and be back up for 3am until around 4.30am, she will then sleep until 6am and she is awake for the day. This is her sleeping pattern every night.
Me and my partner have now started taking shifts each night with one of us sleeping downstairs to try and get some sleep. I did take her to the doctors around 6 weeks ago as I am concerned about her lack of sleep but the doctor basically laughed me out of the room saying ‘the amount of mothers I’ve had complaining their baby doesn’t sleep’ and then the appointment turned into her basically asking if I think I may have postnatal depression?! I’m not depressed, I am just exhausted. I have also spoken to the health visitor, and her only advice was to send nursery nurses to the house to show me how to establish a good bedtime routine. I explained that we have a consistent bedtime routine, with tea, bath, bottle, cuddles and then bed. She then said that the only option was to ride it out.
Is there any tips or tricks people have tried that have worked? My eldest is 8 y/o and I feel awful for her as I used to be such a fun hands on mama with lots of fun activities to do or playing games and I’m just so exhausted to do anything. My eldest is also Sen, so she is very hands on during the day and as it’s now the Easter holidays I’m worried that we will be spending it in the house because I am drained.
My partner is a god send, and helps as much as he can but he has work most days at 5am, so the majority of child care falls on me. I was also supposed to be returning to work after the holidays (primary school teacher) and I’ve had to now push that back until September because I don’t feel I would be beneficial to a class of 6 y/o when I am so exhausted.

Have you tried walking with her in a sling? Does that make her sleep?

Could she be in pain? When she’s fighting a nap does she look uncomfortable? Does she dislike her ears being touched? Show signs of teething? Try giving her a dose of calpol and see if she settles.

Have you ruled out allergies and intolerances to food/milk?

Sounds like you have a chronically overtired baby. Unfortunately overtired babies don’t sleep so you are in a vicious cycle.

You know her best. If it still doesn’t feel right then go back to the doctor and get a second opinion.

I know how hard it is to have a baby that doesn’t sleep. You are doing a great job and even if it doesn’t feel like it now, it is a phase and will pass.

Thank you for your reply.
She used to fall asleep for naps on me, but now she doesn’t like to be touched when going to sleep.
When trying to put her down for naps she just doesn’t seem tired eventhough all the signs are there. She will keep trying to stand up in her cot, she then becomes frustrated that I keep lying her back down.
I did think teething could be the problem, as she still has no teeth but she hates calpol and will scream and spit it out when trying to give her it. I’ve even tried supermarket versions of calpol but she just won’t take it. She will use teething rings/teething gel but they don’t seem to help. Her ears seem fine, she doesn’t pull at them and they don’t seem to be red/sore.
I think a second opinion is the way to go, and hopefully they can do some form of baby mot to rule everything out.
My mil did say that my partner was exactly the same as a child and didn’t sleep until he was almost 3, which just fills me with anxiety😅