12 month old sleep help!

[TryingToStaySane92]

My little one has never been great with sleep but now I'm back at work I am struggling so bad! She'll go through phases of sleeping through for 3/4 nights then we'll have 2-3 weeks of pure hell and then same again. I'm at an absolute loss on what to do.
She would only contact nap until she was 10 months old then finally we were able to put her down to nap but she needs to be held to fall asleep. But currently she wakes straight back up when we put her down and it's a nightmare. I've tried the pick up put down method but she just stands up in her cot and screams so she never makes it down and same with Ferber. I've also tried sitting down next to the cot stroking her back etc but she still cries and cries. I can't stand to hear her cry out she gets herself in an absolute state. I think it'll help her sleeping if she can fall asleep in her cot for naps and bedtime but I have no idea how to help her do this. She has never taken a dummy and does seem a fan of teddies either so she has nothing to help her feel secure when I'm not there. She also starts nursery next week and I'm scared she won't sleep there either.
Please help, I feel like such a rubbish mum, she's tired, I'm tired and I can't do this!

My dd was the exact same. At 12 months she just completely stopped letting us transfer her to the cot asleep. She would wake up immediately or 30 seconds after we put her down.

We switched to a floorbed and it changed our lives! We just lie next to her for 10-15 minutes and then roll away. She also started sleeping through the first night in it, after waking 1-3 times a night for months. She's slept through since.

I'd second getting a floor bed, we have one for our 14 month old. Has made settling easier as can just lie next to her until she's asleep, no transfers needed, which is great now they're heavier! I also sleep in there with her from about 3am. I wouldn't worry about nursery naps, mine has never fell asleep on her own for a nap, and she does nap at nursery (not for very long but it's enough to get her though). Nursery should do whatever is needed to get them to sleep, and it's common for babies to need support to sleep for naps. It's a tough period for sleep when you go back to work, as it's also a peak age for separation anxiety. What are her naps like currently, could she do with less naps and/or later bedtime so she is more tired? Obvious point but assume you have a partner, you need to divide the nights evenly now you're working. For us, my DH does the first part of the night and i do the second part as I'm still breastfeeding so I BF in the early hours.