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Help! 15 minutes sleep last night - this can't be normal

21 replies

PregnantPumpkin · 08/01/2026 20:44

Is this normal?? My little one is only 5 weeks old so still very young but his sleep seems to be getting worse the last two weeks. I was trying a routine of bath about 7:30/8pm then milk and cuddle to sleep, hold for 20 minutes once asleep then transfer into cot. This works generally and he'll sleep for an hour or so but then he's often awake until 3 or 4am, today it was 6am. To start with he is awake but seems quite happy, making noises and just generally awake but by about 3am he's getting to the point of being over tired and seems to get reflux so is screaming and spitting up. Co sleeping has worked a few times but as I don't breast feed and I think that's one of the safe 7 steps I don't like to co sleep, but have done out of desperation, but even this doesn't work every time. He's on formula and I make up a 120ml bottle but he doesn't often finish all that, usually takes about 60-90ml over an hour, often spits up, usually just at night but all day today we have been struggling with spit up. We are trying kendamil comfort drops so hoping they might start to help. But in the meantime how are we supposed to cope! He sleeps in the day but only in my arms, sometimes he will sleep with my husband holding him but quite often he gets fussy without me. Last night I got 15 minutes of sleep, thankfully when my husband got back from work late morning we all managed to get about 2 hours sleep. But we are desperate, is this normal, what else should we be doing. We are beyond tired.

OP posts:
ChaliceinWonderland · 08/01/2026 20:47

Its colic. Breastfeeding is always best. ... i remember those night's- horrendous! Empathising x

Yellowpink1 · 08/01/2026 21:06

Are you able to change the formula? What one are you using at the moment?

Are you bumping him long enough after the feeds?

PregnantPumpkin · 08/01/2026 21:42

I wanted to breastfeed but it hasn't worked out.
He's on kendamil original formula, I have looked and there's a comfort one that is more gentle so will try that next if the drops don't help.
I think we need to burp him more, sometimes we just get nothing from him after trying for quite a while and then he spits up as soon as we lye him down.

OP posts:
partytimed · 08/01/2026 22:04

Not very helpful to say breastfeeding is best! OP if you were breastfeeding you could have still had the same issue so try to move on from the obnoxious comments. I would advise taking it in shifts as much as you can, infacol drops before a feed. Sounds like colic and they grow out of it usually by 12 weeks but it’s survival until then.

welshweasel · 08/01/2026 22:08

When your husband is around I would split the nights. You go to bed at 8pm and sleep until 1am then he sleeps 1am-6am or vice versa. You need to ensure you’re both getting sleep. At 5 weeks old I wouldn’t be worrying about bedtimes at all, but do try to get them to sleep as much as you can during the day - wake windows are short at this age.

GlasgowGal2014 · 08/01/2026 22:30

It might be colic, or it could be the reflux that is causing the sleeplessness. Although you've seen baby spit up they may also have something called silent reflux where the milk comes back up partially digested, but doesn't make it out of their mouth, and it's very unpleasant for them. They also don't necessarily grow out of it as quickly as colic. Speak to your health visitor about what they advise, and keep trying until you find something that works. There are various comfort milks available, but there are also prescription-only medicines like famotidine that can make a big difference.

@welshweasel gives good advice on splitting the nights. Based on my experience you need to accept this as your new normal and come up with a plan to get as much sleep as you can, otherwise your mental health may be affected. Sleep deprivation is used as torture for good reason!

GlasgowGal2014 · 08/01/2026 22:32

PS - I was lucky to be able breastfed both my kids and my eldest still had horrendous silent reflux. Don't beat yourself up about not being able to breastfeed - fed is best!

mumofbun · 08/01/2026 22:32

Have you tried things like infacol? And wonky winding? Mine always had to burp after a feed x

mumofbun · 08/01/2026 22:34

Also ignore the BF comment - I breastfed both of mine. First had silent reflux, second had dairy allergy...

Yellowpink1 · 08/01/2026 22:37

PregnantPumpkin · 08/01/2026 21:42

I wanted to breastfeed but it hasn't worked out.
He's on kendamil original formula, I have looked and there's a comfort one that is more gentle so will try that next if the drops don't help.
I think we need to burp him more, sometimes we just get nothing from him after trying for quite a while and then he spits up as soon as we lye him down.

I had to switch formula 3 times.

I found kendamil to be the worse unfortunately. Especially for wind and spit up and also caused him discomfort.

I ended up using sma pro and I'm not joking but after two days it was a massive improvement!

If you haven't yet please give sma pro a try.

Treatingmyself · 08/01/2026 22:38

@ChaliceinWonderland horrible comment

NessShaness · 08/01/2026 22:50

Is the teat size right for him? It could be that the milk isn’t flowing through if it’s taking so long to feed, and he’ll be swallowing a lot of air.

My DD had silent reflux, she did not sleep at all until it was diagnosed. Holding them upright for 30 minutes after a feed can help, but do speak to your HV/GP to get it ruled out x

PregnantPumpkin · 08/01/2026 22:53

I hadn't heard of wonky winding, given it a Google and just got a very big burp up, so that will be my go to technique - sometimes I can be sat patting him for ages and nothing so that was a success!
I will get some infacol drops as soon as I can get into town, might be a few days with the snow so will keep using the kendamil comfort drops until I can get them. If that doesn't help I will try a new formula.
We keep saying we will try and sleep in shifts but my husband works split shifts so between his coming and going, exercising a working dog and trying to keep on top of laundry and cooking we never seem to manage it. We need to try harder because the lack of sleep is starting to get to us.
It could be silent reflux possibly, his throat sounds wet sometimes if that makes sense, not sure if that's just normal baby noises though, they honestly should come with a manual.

OP posts:
dijonketchup · 08/01/2026 22:56

welshweasel · 08/01/2026 22:08

When your husband is around I would split the nights. You go to bed at 8pm and sleep until 1am then he sleeps 1am-6am or vice versa. You need to ensure you’re both getting sleep. At 5 weeks old I wouldn’t be worrying about bedtimes at all, but do try to get them to sleep as much as you can during the day - wake windows are short at this age.

This! The huge benefit to you of not breastfeeding is that you can sleep in shifts, do it. Otherwise, change will come soon enough whatever you do, it’s so hard while you’re living it but you’ll be looking back in no time at all from a totally new situation. That’s babies…

PregnantPumpkin · 08/01/2026 22:56

We have a GP appointment next week so hopefully they'll be able to help.
We changed bottles as advised by the midwives because he was extremely slow to feed initially.
I've been holding him upright for the 20minutes or so when he falls asleep before trying to put him into his cot. The night time anxiety I get now is ridiculous, just panicking that we'll have another sleepless night

OP posts:
PregnantPumpkin · 08/01/2026 22:59

dijonketchup · 08/01/2026 22:56

This! The huge benefit to you of not breastfeeding is that you can sleep in shifts, do it. Otherwise, change will come soon enough whatever you do, it’s so hard while you’re living it but you’ll be looking back in no time at all from a totally new situation. That’s babies…

This is what I keep telling myself, it will change and hopefully get better now matter what we do.. I mean no one is burping their 17 year old and worrying about if the room is the right temperature or not right 😅 and whenever he is sleeping through the night I'll probably miss him being so small and the night time cuddles occasionally

OP posts:
NessShaness · 08/01/2026 23:04

You sound like a lovely mum. I hope you get some rest tonight!

Peonies12 · 09/01/2026 10:09

Unfortunately that does sound normal - babies want to be near you. If not breastfeeding is the only factor that is stopping you co-sleeping, I'd personally still do it. But I'd get your husband to sleep elsewhere when he comes home as he will be very tired and that's not safe. It's much easier in my experience to bedshare just you and the baby. And do the same for naps, try and bedsharing rather than sitting holding the baby on the sofa - it's much riskier if you fall asleep sitting on the sofa than lying on a bed. I'd really prioritise sleeping in shifts if you can, just use ready meals, get a cleaner if that possible for you etc. Or use a carrier for the baby in the day so you can do bits whilst baby naps? hang in there, it's tough but it will get better!

BlackCat14 · 09/01/2026 10:14

Please ignore the nasty “breast is best” poster.

My five month old is bottle fed and since he was 12 weeks old he has slept through 10/11 hours a night. This may not help you right now OP, but may give you releif to know it gets better!

mumofbun · 09/01/2026 12:25

PregnantPumpkin · 08/01/2026 22:53

I hadn't heard of wonky winding, given it a Google and just got a very big burp up, so that will be my go to technique - sometimes I can be sat patting him for ages and nothing so that was a success!
I will get some infacol drops as soon as I can get into town, might be a few days with the snow so will keep using the kendamil comfort drops until I can get them. If that doesn't help I will try a new formula.
We keep saying we will try and sleep in shifts but my husband works split shifts so between his coming and going, exercising a working dog and trying to keep on top of laundry and cooking we never seem to manage it. We need to try harder because the lack of sleep is starting to get to us.
It could be silent reflux possibly, his throat sounds wet sometimes if that makes sense, not sure if that's just normal baby noises though, they honestly should come with a manual.

So glad you got a burp with the wonky winding! Hopefully everything combined will help - I remember that night time fear, it makes it so hard to get to sleep in the first place worrying! But it will pass, like you said no one is burping their 17 year old X

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams · 09/01/2026 16:48

Stick a couple of books under the head end of the cot/Moses basket so it is on a gentle slope. It will help a little with reflux.

Is the baby sleeping during the day ? ie are they basically nocturnal? That isn't unusual in my experience. It's a bit of a vicious circle as you are so shattered you'll then let them sleep during the day so you can get any sleep yourself. Which is fine if you have no sodding visitors. You can start to gently push daytime awake time. Burping, chatting, toe tickling. Take a look at some of the suggested routines and start to work towards it over the next few weeks.

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