Attempting a cot transfer after 12 months - are we mad?!

[FourHoursPlease]

I had/have one of those classic velcro babies who never accepted being in the crib/cot/Moses, and would wake up without fail on transfer anyway.

Consequently, we’ve contact napped and co-slept for the past year which has been fine overall because I breastfeed. But bugger me, my left hip is actually shot due to the weight of baby when contact napping and from lying in the same side position all night long. The pain and soreness is getting pretty bad and lasts all day long.

I’ve decided we’re going to attempt a cot transfer tonight, the last time we tried was probably about four months ago. Are we mad?! Has anyone managed to get a cot-refusing baby to finally accept a transfer after their first birthday?

I know even if the transfer is successful I’ll only get perhaps an hour free to stretch out at most, but I’m willing to give it a try! Please wish me luck! 😅

If the transfer doesn't work out, could a floor bed in his own room be an option? Then he could fall asleep with you there and then you can roll away.

We're thinking about moving our 12 month old to a floor bed soon because she keeps trying to climb out of her cot.

It could be an option, but for two things:

We don’t reeeeally have the space, although we could make it work if we had to. The baby proofing of the room would also be a bit of a pain (obviously it would be done though!).

But the main reason would be that we are a bit fed up of spending money on furniture, only for it not to be used. I could cry when I think of what we spent on the Snuzpod, the Moses basket, and the cot bed. Then a second, smaller cot bed that we set up for the co-sleeping. I’d love to get him to accept the cot. But I appreciate it may never happen!

My 1st would only ever contact nap and Cosleep. Took to 18 months and then one night she decided to sleep in her cot bed. Wed taken the sides off it by that point in time as I was sitting in there with her in the day whilst she slept in her own bed. She climbed in ine night and insisted that was where she was sleeping.

My first was much like this. We ended up often being able to transfer, but actually I more often would just feed to sleep in the cot - we have a cot bed so I could squeeze in.

i found it easier to transfer from about 6 months, I have an 18-month-old. I find you have to wait 9-10 minutes and then he's in such a deep sleep that I can transfer. I have also found that sometimes, if I can't be bothered to wait, i'll transfer him after 5 minutes and he's gone from cranky and crying about it to just rolling into a more comfortable position and accepting it. I've also found in the last month or so, that sometimes if I pause and not go up immediately when he wakes during nap time (after 45 min cycle) 9/10 times he'll now close his eyes and go back to sleep. (He does one whingy cry noise, which i think is annoyance at waking up, and then gets comfy and goes back to sleep)

All that to say try it.... Keep trying it and you might find they get used to it!

I'd have a read of the Ferber sleep training book first.

It'll give you very good advice on how to achieve this in as short a time as possible, and be confident in what you're doing.

Thanks all. I would never have thought the cot bed would take my weight though! (Whoever said breastfeeding helps the weight come off was lying haha.)

Ferber and any form of CIO is not for us, but thank you for the suggestion.

Lol we were mad to try. He woke up and started crying as soon as his bum touched the mattress. I know it won’t be for ever but I just wish my body would stop hurting!

Ferber.
It works in two nights.
Then you can have your evenings back, you'll sleep all night, and your body will stop aching.

Have you tried a hot water bottle on the mattress before and maybe a T-shirt of yours or sheet that smells of you?

It’s too late for a cot, honestly do the floor bed. Neither of mine ever slept in a cot in the end. You don’t need to buy anything, dismantle the bed and stick the mattress on the floor. The baby proofing will probably be easier than you think. You also don’t need to lie on your side anymore with a baby that big, that’s just when they’re teeny. Lie however you’re comfortable (if he’ll let you)

Works for some babies in 2 nights, doesn’t work for a whole lot more. No independent data supporting Ferber helping babies actually sleep better for any length of time.

I'd really recommend a floor bed. Just get a single mattress from Ikea, and lift it up during the day to get air underneath.

And your baby's brain will be pumped full of stress hormones.... There's so much gentler ways to transition away from co-sleeping.

I cosleep with my babies. My eldest moved to a floor bed at 15 months, my second at 11 months. In my room, next to my bed. I spent months before that getting them to sleep in my bed but within their own space so we weren't touching. It's a process. Good luck. My 2.5 year old still comes in with me part way through the night though I try to put him back it doesn't always work.

Do you have a link I can read to check the science behind this please?