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6 month old and sleep training

2 replies

Jaz93 · 30/06/2025 21:28

We've probably got ourselves into this predicament ourselves but looking for advise on helping our 6 month old get to sleep please. I know sleep training is controversial but looking for all points of view and ideas welcome.

Our 6 month old has always been good at going down to sleep at night...by feeding to sleep with either a bottle or breastfeeding. However, the last few weeks he refuses to be fed to sleep and because we've always done it that way (our own fault) he has no other methods to help get him to sleep successfully either with our help or self settling.

My Fiancé wants to do gentle sleep training, he's researched and thinks the pick up put down is the best gentle way.

We are only on our 2nd night and I'm struggling. Our son cries instantly and is hard to console. Eventually he begins to get more and more tired and closer to sleep but to me it seems that is only because he's cried so much he's shattered! Does the pick up put down not just teach him that if he cries hard and long enough that I'll pick him up and comfort him? Is he not just learning I'll come and get him eventually? Maybe we aren't doing the method correctly. Just to add I don't want to do the full cry it out method, I understand this may work for others no judegemtn but its personally not for me and I can't be convinced of it.

I don't want to sleep train at all, it makes me feel very guilty and upset (no judgement to those who have sleep trained) but I also am not sure our son has the temperament for it to work. He goes from 0 to 100 very quickly, no in-between.

I'd happily just carry on feeding him to sleep or rocking him as we did before but as I say that no longer works. He throws himself about as if he's trying to keep himself awake. He begins to cry as soon as we start taking him up to bed, and completely loses it when we pop him in the sleepsack. I'm not sure why he suddenly doesn't want to go to bed.

Any advise, ideas, points of view very welcome please.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Springadorable · 30/06/2025 23:13

Stop. Just stop. It's upsetting you and it's upsetting your son. Why you would want to teach him that if he cries and cries for you you won't comfort him is beyond me.

He could have teeth coming in, have you tried nurofen half an hour before trying to feed to sleep? Otherwise I'd just push bedtime back a little if he's not ready for sleep but is otherwise pretty cheerful. In a few weeks it will all change again. You'll get through this, but it's not worth distressing you both.

KateColx · 30/06/2025 23:29

I have a 6 month old who is also fed to sleep currently, so I appreciate how hard it would be for her to all of a sudden stop that and having to find a new way, however a routine that is making both you and him sad can’t be the best thing for any of you. He’s so little and just needs his Mum / Dad.

Is he tired enough / overtired? I’ve noticed our little girls bedtime has shifted a little later recently, but if I miss the right time to take her up, she can lose it too and become even harder to get to sleep.

Have you tried just laying with him on your bed / his bed? My friends little boy hates being rocked / fed to sleep but needs someone there until he’s asleep.

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