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Baby fights every single nap!!

7 replies

Dollycat123 · 19/06/2025 20:50

Need advice mums!! My little one is almost 8 months old. She’s recently transferred to her own room for bed time sleep and is doing really well, sleeping through the night the last few nights. But day time naps have always been a problem. When I started struggling to rock her to sleep (as she got heavier), I started rocking her whilst on a yoga ball, which made it much easier on my back. Although still can take around 20 - 30 mins of bouncing. I learned to deal with this, until recently when we’ve gone out, I’ve found it impossible to rock her to sleep without my yoga ball. I have to stand whilst rocking, and bounce quite vigorously, which is exhausting. Meanwhile, she screams, stiffens her body in protest, punches out and almost launches her body out of my arms. I find this really embarrassing as I just look like a mum who can’t console her baby. The last couple of times when I’ve been out, I’ve had to give in and try keep her as happy as I can (which is very difficult when she’s tired and grumpy) and wait for the car ride home to get her to sleep. Needless to say, this makes going out very stressful.

I’ve tried a couple of sleep training methods, however listening to her cry was unbearable. She just got herself too worked up, cried and cried for hours and was unconsolable. She definitely is not the type to cry herself to sleep. Also tried the more gentle approaches, but she eventually just cries anyway because she’s getting more and more tired.

i always look out for sleep cues and have the huckleberry app which offers guidance as to when she is due a nap, so don’t think being over or under tired is the issue here. I just don’t know what else to do!! I don’t want to stress about going out or avoiding it all together because I can’t get her to nap. She also doesn’t nap in her pram either so unfortunately nice, leisurely walks aren’t a solution here 😫

OP posts:
Cheepcheepcheep · 19/06/2025 21:03

My second was like this and you have all my sympathies, it’s a nightmare. I wish I could offer you anything other than ‘keep on keeping on’. My first was a bit like this but it was lockdown so I didn't have the social element to deal with.

Some kids are low sleep needs. I know, I had two of them. It’s brutal. A few pointers:

Do whatever you need to do. The number of lunches I just walked out of and transferred my friends the money for after…

Don’t be tempted to hibernate. No one feels better for staying in the house with a non sleeping baby vs leaving (except those babies that only sleep like a dream in their cots but DD doesn’t sound like that!)

Feel no shame. You’re an amazing mum. You get the baby you get. Mine have aged me 100 years but I wouldn’t swap them for the world. People who haven’t had babies like these just do not know. This isn’t a failing of yours, it’s a roll of the dice and you got a baby that doesn’t fall asleep easy.

Reconsider the sleep training - this is controversial but it worked for my DD. It didn’t work for my DS so I’m aware it’s not a silver bullet! But with DD I had DH take the lead on it as I just couldn’t deal with it. Sleep deprivation and hormones didn’t help. DH was better placed. But as I say with DS it didn’t work so…! Like I say every baby is different.

This too will pass. It’s hell when you’re sleep deprived, and it does basically destroy your sanity but it’s a short window in the context of kids. Mine have only just settled down upstairs but I haven’t been rocking them, they’re reading bloody Tiddler and chatting. Very cute, would love them to sleep but it’s light touch from my side!

Hope you’re okay, hang in there.

Dollycat123 · 19/06/2025 21:59

Thankyou for your reply ❤️ I started to feel like my baby was the only one! When I speak to other mums, or when they see me trying to get her to sleep, they seem horrified. My husband is better at rocking her to sleep, but he never used the yoga ball, so didn’t create an unhelpful crutch. And just the fact that he’s bigger and stronger than me works in his favour.

I really wouldn’t mind rocking her to sleep forever if it meant I could just sit down and do it gently, and she wouldn’t scream so much.

But thanks for the encouragement, I needed that!

OP posts:
Partridgewell · 19/06/2025 22:02

My DD was like this and it was a complete nightmare. She would sometimes fall asleep in a sling - might be worth a try. She's 21 now and still wakes up at the crack of dawn!

FlyingHighFlyingLow · 20/06/2025 10:23

Nap resistance is really common with good night sleepers. Drop naps earlier, need less of them. Because they get more sleep at night. At this age mine was still waking 8-12 times a night and was therefore fucking knackered and went down for a nap quickly.

MamaBear8484 · 20/06/2025 14:47

Oh love, I feel for you so much! You're doing absolutely nothing wrong, and anyone judging a mum trying to settle her baby clearly has no idea what they're talking about, so try not to sweat it!

It sounds like you've got a little one who knows exactly what she wants (strong-willed from an early age - she'll go far! 😅). The fact that she's sleeping through the night in her own room recently is actually massive, so you're definitely doing something right.

When I was having issues with my little one, I came across a helpful guide on Twinkl about sleep support and managing sleep deprivation - they've got some brilliant practical tips that might give you some new ideas
https://www.twinkl.co.uk/resources/pregnancy-baby-parents/baby-parents/parents-birth-to-twos-new-parents-sleeping

Sending you lots of support - you're doing an amazing job! 💕

https://www.twinkl.co.uk/resources/pregnancy-baby-parents/baby-parents/parents-birth-to-twos-new-parents-sleeping

Summersun91 · 20/06/2025 21:45

Hi

I’m so sorry to hear about your struggles. You’re doing an amazing job! Unfortunately I don’t have any suggestions, just wanted to sympathise.

My daughter also fought every nap. I didn’t have to bounce her, but she cried herself to sleep for about 90% of her naps. This includes any naps when she was in my arms. I found it very upsetting that even with my comforting her she’d still cry until she fell asleep. And it would usually take at least 20mins of crying to fall asleep, often much longer. Which made any kind of naps out and about difficult.

Just to add she was a fairly good night sleeper, and also went to sleep quite easily at night.

Suddenly when she turned 11 months she mostly stopped crying herself to sleep for naps.

OtterMummy2024 · 20/06/2025 22:38

Honestly, I just timed car journeys (and still do...) to guarantee the balls. Make sure they're really tired, then drive however far is necessary to get them to do enough sleep. It makes me go for days out further afield than I otherwise would. It also makes me stay out and tire LO (swings, toddling now) as much as possible so they sleep on the return leg too.

I agree with @FlyingHighFlyingLow you either get crap naps or crap nights and even though the crap naps at 5.5-7 months totally shot my mental health, it was better than having crap night sleep. My 13 month old has just dropped to one nap rather earlier than expected and we have to cap it at 90 minutes or we get bed time refusal and/or early starts. The fun never ends 🙃

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