Help 6 months old waking up every 45 minutes at night

[Francesmalin]

Hello,

My 6 months old baby has been waking up every 45 minutes at night time and she only feeds to sleep. She is basically attached to the breast all night. I am going completely insane and I am really keen to understand how other people have solved this issue. She refuses the bottle and I am not a fan of sleep training.

Any advice welcome on how to support the sleep cycle and also reduce the feed to sleep reliability.

Thank you

i couldn't do sleep training either so defo not going to advise that. Things that helped for me when i was like this (exhausted to tears) and baby waking all night was - a dummy (both mine loved a dummy - were both massive babies who would have fed 24/7) - formula as the last feed before bed (perseverance is key and if they're really hungry they'll have it) and porridge coz it kept them fuller for longer. *and co sleeping but i know that's prob against advice from health visitors but it's the only way i got any sleep and i had a bedside attachment crib thing i could roll them over into . good luck! x

No advice, just solidarity! My 7 month old DD is exactly the same.

45 minutes isn't a full night time sleep cycle - could baby be uncomfortable?

What’s she like feeding in the day?

my 6 month old was like this during a sleep regression, basically wouldn’t feed all day as she had so much to see and do! Then was on me all night make up for it!
tbh we have co slept from the beginning following safe sleeping guides and now I just latch her on and close my eyes it’s the only way I survive. Have recently started weaning and trying to offer breast throughout the day she wasn’t always interested but have been also trying to add a bit of ready to feed formula tbh to fill her up in the day more. It has helped as she is going a little longer but she won’t always take the formula! I feel your pain!!

I couldn’t do a cry it out, but I found putting in a solid bedtime routine and sleep associations other than feeding helped. So I’d give her her last feed downstairs in a bright room, then go up and ‘do bedtime’. She was initially a little upset, and fussy going into the cot awake but I figured if I was there to support her, shushing her, sometimes nearly in the cot on top of her, and she was fed, in the right tog sleeping bag etc then it was just her way of communicating and she wasn’t alone upset ever. It took a while, some nights 60-90 mins, but got easier and night sleep improved. Feeding to sleep had just stopped working for me though, I couldn’t transfer her to the cot without waking and starting over so had to do something. It’s really really hard.

No advice, but i was you several years ago and I did survive. Child now wouldn't wake up in the night if a bomb went off, so there is hope.

she could be hungry. We had this with DD, health visitor said to begin weaning so we did. Baby porridge and homemade blended fruit/veg did the trick! A nice big bowl (obviously lead by her appetite) before bed and the rest, as they say, is history!

we ebf but then introduced bottles of ebm to fill her up before bed so she wasn’t hungry in the night. That took a long time, trying a bottle every single day to get her to take it.

Own cot. dream feed when I went to bed myself. Teach how to fall asleep without you, which for us was Cry It Out but there are other methods. If you rock to sleep etc they want rocking every sleep cycle.

good luck!

Have a look at the Ferber method - gentle sleep training. Something to bear in mind if other things don't work. I was the same as you. Sleeping through in 3 nights

Co sleeping transformed my sleep. Baby just smelt me or touched my hand at night and was soothed. Much less waking

When mine does/did this I just get DH to sort them out in between feeds so we share the load. I would breastfeed at any wakes say around 2hrs or so but in between he will take baby and cuddle or rock them etc whatever needed. The first two had dummies which helped too. It will pass though even if you don't do anything, but if you have a partner I don't see why you need to be struggling alone with it.

Thanks everyone for the support. We can't really do sleep training because my baby has severe eczema and when she cries she scratches to bleed.we need to be very careful. During the day she doesn't feed a lot so I am going to try to introduce formula or expressed milk with a cup.

My partner can't really help at night because he works in pyrotechnics and it's not safe for him to go to work without a proper sleep. He tries and help during the weekend and does the bedtime routine most of the evenings.

I have started placing her in the cot awake but she didn't take it really well but we'll do every night until she gets more comfortable with the all routine

I will definitely get in touch with the health visitor and see if they can offer some advice for the night feeds issues. I have also started to introduce some other soothing methods.

It's really hard work

Ok with the eczema as well, I'm very inclined to think baby is waking because they're uncomfortable.

Have you asked for a referral to the allergy clinic? Is it possible baby might have a milk allergy?

@Nonametonight at the times she is uncomfortable but she is following a course of treatment for her eczema so that's under control. So far no milk allergy but we'll see a allergy pediatrician soon.

I think it's just comfort for her and hopefully at one point she'll grow out of these night feeds

The issue is that she feeds to sleep.

Stop feeding her to sleep. You could start by waking up her after she’s fallen asleep so she doesn’t rely on being actively feeding to get back to sleep.

@RandomMess yes I think this is the actual problem. Any other tips on how to stop to feed to sleep especially at night?

This is so so hard. She's reliant on boob to get her back to sleep. I'd change up the way you get her to sleep. Ideally move, through habit stacking, to getting her to fall asleep in the cot with you shushing and patting her bottom or whatever works.
You can move to this by shushing and patting her bottom whilst feeding then gradually have a bigger gap between feeding and getting her in the cot to fall asleep with shushing and patting.
Also try and get her attached to a comforter toy, get her to hold it all the time, in the pram, playing, sleeping.

It's tough but it will get even tougher. The older they are, the more aware and more stubborn they are. Six months is an ideal age to change sleep habits.

Also wonder if she's uncomfortable, is she burped after a feed? Thus could be causing the waking too. Again, a gap between feeding and getting to sleep will help.

Good luck xx

excema IS linked with milk intolerance. Honestly my health visitors were hopeless about this. Switch to a different formula and cut dairy for a week or two to see the difference. She’s 6 months so it’s fine. You will need other foods for protein calcium etc so look at soy formulas etc Poor thing will be suffering especially in this heat.

I agree with introducing a comforter.

I found pick up put down very good, I saw it very much they were learning it was ok to lay there tired on their own, any upset and I’d be there in an instant. Your DH could also help with this.

This is what we have started doing. We are feeding her after her bath and then my husband takes her in the cot so she gets comfortable in again. Now we are going to introduce habit stacking and try and have her in the cot more at night.its exhausting to be woken up every 45 minutes!

Luckily her eczema is under control at the moment so she is fine with the heat (so far)

Thanks for all the advice

So so exhausting, and you can't see the wood for the trees. I would also look at cutting out dairy if she has eczema. My daughter was the same (very mild skin issues and one or two reflux episodes a day) cutting dairy (me cutting it out!) was the answer for us.

OP a few weeks on from your original post, have you implemented any changes? I’m in the same boat and trawling this board for advice!

Hello @MrsScotland unfortunately I haven't found a solution. I am just getting used of not being sleep deprived. I am trying habit stacking to reduce the association of sleeping to feed but that might take 2-3 months. The sleeping is getting worse with baby waking up and looking for comfort 7-8 time a night. It's impossible to settle her without the breast. I am not a fan of extinction sleeping methods so I have looked at holistic sleeping coaches to see if we can find a solution to regulate her sleep and eventually reduce the need for comfort. It's exhausting especially because she refuses the bottle and I can't have a break.

What have you tried so far?

Your baby is waking up at the light part of her sleep cycle and doesn’t know how to put herself back to sleep. Most of us wake briefly throughout the night but we never know it as we quickly fall back asleep.

I had this with my first, and also didn’t want to sleep train. I did at 7 months as me and baby were sleep deprived. Being able to get back asleep is a basic skill a baby needs.

We used a method where you stay with baby but don’t pick them up. Me and H did half hour bouts of staying with our son. He fell asleep after 40 mins. And with that he learnt how to get himself asleep. It was amazing. I felt bad for him I hadn’t done it sooner. His naps and night time sleep much improved.

He still woke at night but only about two times.

I think if a baby at that age is waking that much, it’s actually in the baby’s best interest to sleep train.

Just to add, the method I outlined I got from a ‘gentle parent’ who was also tried it when she was at the end of her tether. She said it wasn’t as bad as she thought and her baby quickly learnt to get herself to sleep. She also wished she had done it sooner.

The lesson I learnt was that my baby really wanted to learn how to get back to sleep, but I hadn’t been letting him. I thought I was being kind to my baby, but I really wasn’t. Staying with him as he learnt to get himself to sleep was kind. He was a happier baby once he could sleep properly, and he had a happier, more with-it Mother, which was good for him.