Self settling

[LucyBass]

I have a 14 week old ' velcro ' baby.
I want to look at trying to get her to self settle as i also have a 2 year old that im getting no time with because my 14 week old won't let me put her down... help?!

Well you need to put her down whilst awake but drowsy, let her fall asleep along. Bloody difficult.

could you try a sling?

I tried the drowsy technique this afternoon and wasn't working! Trouble is i cant spend too long upstairs with her as i have my 2 year old downstairs!

I have used and sling and she does like that but i cant sit down with her and she starts crying and also hurts my back and shoulders after an hour! At my wits end! X

She’s only 14 weeks.

my eldest never self settled until I sleep trained at 6m.

my youngest would fall asleep on a play mat and the like but still needed sleep training after the 4m sleep regression.

my youngest was often in a sling. Luckily I was able to sit in it which helped! You could try a different sling if you’re finding it uncomfortable.

does she sleep downstairs in a carry cot or similar? You can get rocking stands, so you might find it easier to pop her in one of those and rock her to sleep which then enables you to get on with other things once she’s asleep. I’ve also seen those rockit things you can put on pushchairs, never used one myself but maybe worth a bash?

my youngest liked swaddling and white noise. My eldest hated swaddling and I never tried white noise. Just some things to consider.

I also tried a routine with both which involved singing a particular song and ended with the phrase ‘sleepy time now’ before putting down. I carried that on until they were about 2 in all honesty. Before every nap and bedtime sleep.

My baby's sleep was awful at 14 weeks, I was barely keeping it together. Nothing I did helped. You can't teach them to self settle just yet, it's too young, you need to wait until 4-5 months, or even 6 if she's small and not showing signs yet.

Yeah, she wont fall asleep unless its on me or in the pram with me rocking it and white noise!

I use white noise for both of the kids!

I actually mentioned today about getting a rockit for the pram! Thank you xx

I have a swing she sits in and it swings round etc but she wont sit in it for longer than 5mins.. she also has really bad reflux and i heard reflux babies and more clingy? Don't know if that's something to do with it!

Trying to tackle the reflux also! I know its all just a phase but its just so hard as i cant get anything done and i cant play with my other little girl xxx

"Drowsy but awake" is nonsense to sell sleep books. In reality, they always wake up when you put them down. It's sensible, from an evolutionary viewpoint - babies are safer from predators if stuck to their mum.

Just cuddle her and do what makes her happy. It's such a short time. If you need a break, do you have a partner or friend who can hold her while you play with your elder daughter.

I found the easiest way was to have baby in the sling so I had my hands free to play, make lunch, hoover etc. it does get easier though and 14 weeks is so tiny.
Make sure your partner steps up so you are not doing it all, he can do bits around the house and give you breaks when he is at home.

Reflux is awful and it will contribute to her not wanting to be on her back. Reflux babies sleep a lot better once they start rolling and sleeping on their front.

My baby had terrible reflux but it was down to cows milk allergy. I cut dairy from my diet and his reflux and fussiness went away completely.