I fell to sleep with my 16 week old in the bed last night.

[pamelat]

I appreciate that their are a lot of co sleeping mums on this website, but its something which has always scared me and something which I wanted to avoid (my cousin died of cot death and it has always scared me, I know that co-sleeping isn't meant to increase the risk, but irrationally I just dont want to do it)

Anyway, last night my 16 week old woke at midnight for her first night feed (breast feeding during the night), I remember checking the clock after 15 minutes of feeding and the next minute it was 3am (!) and she was fast asleep on my arm (which has hurt me all day). It has really scared me as I was obviously too tired to even be aware of falling to sleep, and my husband was in the bed and he is cross with me about it. He has a point, even if we were to co-sleep he should know about it!

She woke again at 5am to feed but I got up and out of the bed, something which I didnt really want to do (as makes me more tired) but I can see no other option that doing that for each feed now?

Are there any other staying awake techniques? And why didnt I even sense that she was there for 3 hours .. ! I thought breast feeding was meant to ensure that you were attuned to your baby, although maybe I was as I clearly didnt even more for 3 hours

More of a scared ramble than anything else, worried about tonights feeds already x

Hi. Not much experience of sleeping with lo, but in the first few weeks I frequently nodded off in the chair while bfing lo. I thought if I sat up, I wouldn't fall asleep - that was before I experienced the full joys of sleep deprivation!
Btw, when you're that knackered, you're not attuned to anything, lol!

think the only tip i could suggest would be getting up with her, but i'm sure i could have fallen asleep in the chair at that stage i was so exhausted. atuned mainly to the back of my eyelids.

Hi pamelat,

I did that too- a few times, as it happens. I was so tired, I once fell asleep sitting up with no back support or anything! I can assure you though, that every time I did it, I woke up the second my DS moved a millimetre. I am sure it means you are in tune with your baby- exactly because you didn't move for 3 hours!

You could try sitting on the end of the bed, rather than moving to a chair? or stripping off so you're cooler (!!???) if you're really worried, but I don't think you need to feel guilty. Breast feeding releases sleepy hormones in mother and child so you're fighting nature by staying awake!

HTH

Oh, I did that SO many times (did end up co-sleeping with dd too). It's really difficult not too - you're sleepy, its the middle of the night, bf releases sleepy/happy hormones to both you & baby....
It scared me the first few times too, so I would try & make sure there was a pillow under my arm/I was fairly in the middle of the bed, so if the worst happened, she/he would have a soft landing.
Never had any accidents with either of them

thats what worries me, I think my body has decided that sleep is its priority?

Was hoping she would sleep through by now (whole different debate I know) but after pregnancy and 16 weeks of night wakenings, I wonder whether its given in!

Oh, & make sure she's never covered with your duvet - overheating is worth avoiding

I fell asleep feeding dd on the sofa at 3 in afternoon yesterday. Don't beat yorself up, happens to us all! I would kep taking her into bed, you're that tired it is possible to fall askeep in a chair, maybe get dh to help, bring her to you and take her back? Just so you can get some more sleep.

Please don't worry.I co-slept with both mine in the early days.I even woke up one time to find ds had rolled onto the floor which are varnished floorboards,and was sleeping peacefully on the floor.I was horrified but he was happily snoozing and oblivious to it all.(bad parent emoticon needed here)

I think that by 16 weeks old your baby is probably big enough to wake up and protest if you inadvertantly squash her. I think that the very tragic death of your cousin has left you with irrational fears.
If you don't want to co-sleep fair enough, after the first 3 or 4 weeks it wasn't my choice either
But don't stress yourself. Just make sure your DC can't fall out or get too hot (tuck your duvet under you and give DC their own blankets/growbag).
Enjoy your sleep wherever and whenever you can get it.

I too fell asleep once while I was feeding dd in the chair, cant believe I didnt drop her. I really didnt want to fall asleep again with her so I used to put the radio on quietly (talk radio), this also kept me company at 3 in the morning. I liked the fact that people were phoning into the radio station at that time in the morning, it made me feel better knowing that I wasnt the only person awake at stupid o'clock.