18 month old nightmare nights

[Etonmess20]

Hi all,

Have an 18 month old who, for the last god knows how long (probably 9 months), my little one has been awake for c.2 hours every night. He isn't particularly upset during the wake up but can sometimes be a bit wild, chatty etc.
We go in, feed him some milk & then let him settle on us, putting him down doesn't work currently. Rapidly losing patience with things being this way & being constantly tired. Does anyone have any suggestions?

Not keen on co sleeping also have a 2 year old too so would rather not CIO as she may get woken up. My partner does alternate nights to share the load. Little boy also is on a low dose course of anti biotics for glue ear, have an appointment with the specialist tomorrow to see if this is resolved (unsure if this could be a factor)

@Etonmess20 how are his daytime naps? He could be over/under tired.

Thank you for your reply. He has one daytime nap of around 1 hour, usually late morning/lunchtime.
He goes to bed at around 7pm, wakes anywhere from 6am.

Cut the daytime nap. Also it probably is connected to him being ill.

He didn't nap the other day at the childminders & it made no difference to his night time sleep - would this take a while to see if it worked?

Potentially agree re his glue ear, he isn't actively "ill" with it though if that makes sense.

Possibly im not the best person to give advice on this though mine have always been rubbish sleepers! Hopefully someone will come along with some better advice soon :)

My DS gets like this when he hasn't been able to get enough exercise during the day. Is he pretty active?

Definitely related to the ear infection, poor thing.

If you can try and cling onto the nap, we almost dropped a nap and thankfully it self resolved in a couple weeks.

He's really active, doesn't sit down!

He also doesn't have an ear infection at this point, he's had 3 double ear infections over the last 6 months so we saw a specialist privately who identified the glue ear. Hoping tomorrow it has been resolved. He is only "ill" when he has an active ear infection, otherwise you'd never know. Not to say it isn't bothering him of course.

This has been going on for around 9 months now so not a short term "ride it out" type scenario anymore I don't think. We have a 2 year old too so always expected better & worse periods but never had a "better" period yet.

He doesn’t need milk at this age so swop to water if anything ( if he’s having milk in the night you need to be cleaning his teeth afterwards at this age) . Try not to let him settle on you as you need to develop his self soothing and make the interaction with you as boring as possible . How do you settle him when you first put him to bed? Could you try an audio story book or a kids night light with changing colours? In olden times humans did have an awake period in the night ( even got up and did stuff then went back for “ second sleep”) so an awake period not unusual. If he sleeps well otherwise then it’s just a phase to get through ( if you have a history of ADHD/ autism in your family then it’s a different kettle of fish)

@Etonmess20 im an infant sleep consultant so see this kind of thing regularly. Without seeing a full 3 days of routine, I wouldn't feel comfortable giving advice but I id recommend keeping a log of naps etc for a few days and seeing if you can spot any patterns etc. How's his sleep space? Anything that can be waking him (cold/noise)

My DC had glue ear which was caused by enlarged adenoids. What I didn't realise was they were also causing sleep apnea.

Thanks for this - we're back with the specialist tomorrow so will see if it's still present & next steps. I didn't mention sleep issues last time as didn't twig they could be linked but will be sure to mention it this time

In all honesty his routines are usually very consistent, he's never been a huge napper (my 2 year old never was either). We've always been realistic that they have phases but with this "phase" going on for so long I feel it could be more. We were going to engage a sleep consultant a friend has used with her children but wanted clearance from the ENT specialist first

He's slept in his own cot & room since 2 weeks old, he's in a decent togged bag (3.5 as his room does get chilly) so not concerned he's cold, no noise that could be waking him I don't think (especially regularly every night). The wake ups can range from 11.30-5am but always last for near enough 2 hours

Completely empathise with you OP as going through the same with my 22month old. Rubbish sleeper since around 4 months. no advice sorry but a hand hold as I know it's miserable.

It really is, my older one will be 3 in May & ironically only started sleeping through reasonably reliably when her little brother was born so it's been the best part of 3 years with rubbish sleep!

Hope things get better for you!

@Etonmess20 definitely agree, make sure there's no underlying pain before speaking with a sleep consultant, just in case! Any further advice let me know, I can give you my website details and happy to have a quick call if I can provide any support :)