14 month old goes down at 8pm, wakes 3am/5am/6am

[marmite2023]

As title suggests. 14 month old goes down at 8pm, wakes 3am/5am/6am.

is there anything we can do to help with the morning wake ups?

I’ve progressed from sleeping in her bed from 3am to just going in and shushing/offering water and then playing music to calm her cries. I then sleep in her room in the double bed there while she’s in her Montessori bed. However, she struggles to stay asleep once she has gone back to sleep at 3am. Is there anything I can do, or is this how her sleep cycles work?

i breast feed at 5am as she wakes hungry then.

I know she technically counts as sleeping through but we are so close to a full night of sleep that I feel we ought to be able to get there!

Could she be cold? That’s generally the coldest part of the night , I can’t wait till the can self- regulate temperature with blankets duvet etc ….

Otherwise just time my 2.5 still doesn’t sleep through…. One day … yawn 🥱

Yes try boosting heating at 2am and getting fleecy onesie if you haven't already. What time does her last nap finished it's usually linked to naps nighttime sleep x

Yes was going to say the same re heating as that's the coldest part of the night, hence I'm up with mine too!

This was twenty years ago now but one of my DDs went through this and she was having a growth spurt and waking up hungry!

She ate about 5.30 pm and so we made her a supplementary mashed banana just before we put her down. We started giving her a little more food at each meal too.

I think you might be right re cold.

I thought maybe she runs to warm as bringing her into bed with me at 5am and snuggling wasn’t what she wanted - she will kick the duvet off!

we keep the heating on all the time jn her room but her bed is below the window and at the front of the house. But She was sleeping on her front with her arms tucked under even though she’s in a warm sack, which is a sign of cold. I’ll put her sack sleeves on and put an extra blanket in there.

I think she is also getting hungry. She eats amazingly - loves curries and ribs, and anything with lots of flavour (won’t eat plain food!), but she loves her food and doesn’t go more than 2 hours without a refuel during the day. I think I maybe have to accept bottle feeding her at 3am too. Maybe warm milk to reheat her insides…

Mine used to wake at 3am for a bottle at that age. I think he was hungry and maybe cold so a nice warm bottle sent him to add sleep perfectly. He only started sleeping through at 15 months unless he's ill or teething. Try giving her a bottle at 3 and see if it makes a difference

Maybe bring dinner forward half an hour but then in the last 20mins or so before bed offer her a bowl of porridge with full fat milk to really fill her up.

When she goes to bed at 8, is she aided to sleep (eg cuddles or milk or whatever) and then when she wakes in the night without that crutch she can't get back to sleep?

Oh his Dts went through this. It was fucking horrendous. They gradually got later but even now as teens they're usually up by 7.

She sounds just like mine and I also thought the same thing about the cold.

When she goes to bed at 8, is she aided to sleep (eg cuddles or milk or whatever) and then when she wakes in the night without that crutch she can't get back to sleep?
Not the Op but mine is breastfed or cuddled and then needs cuddling or feeding back to sleep and wondered what you were going to say @JimHalpertsWife incase it was anything I could do?

I used to breastfeed and cuddle to sleep, but we have switched now to breast feed downstairs, bottle in chair upstairs, then to bed and dh sits on bed in room while she goes to sleep in her Montessori floor bed.

At 3am, I’m resisting the urge to cuddle her. I do bottom pats and shushing, and then I put music on and sleep in the double bed in her room. I’m going to go back to bottle of milk instead of water as I do think she’s hungry.

we used to breast feed to sleep and co-sleep ( and still often do when we travel) and we’ve got away from that successfully. And she’s good at Independent naps and going down for first sleep from 8pm-3am. She eats quite late. Has a snack at 17.30/18.00 and then eats a proper meal with us at 19.00/19.30. She eats an adult dinner in baby portion, so veg and protein and a carb.

only way she sleeps later is going down later (21.30, she wakes up at 4 or 5am) so it feels like it’s biological/sleep/hunger cycle driven

I just miss her baby days during maternity leave when she used to sleep in until 9.30/10am happily in the bed with me 😭

It's more that whatever they need to fall asleep at bedtime is then usually also what they need to re-settle in the night. If you feed to sleep at bedtime and they need feeding to sleep during the night too, then at some point you may think this is unmanageable (fine if you want to keep doing it of course).

There is also the point when it comes that they simply do not need milk during the night, but no one has learned any other way of getting back off to sleep in the night. And then it becomes necessary to teach them to self settle without the usual comforts.

dh sits on bed in room while she goes to sleep in her Montessori floor bed

Then she likely needs this in the night too. I'd speak with dh about doing "gradual retreat" so that she gets used to falling asleep alone eventually. Happily falling asleep alone at bedtime means that 99% of the time when they wake at night they are content to fall back to sleep alone too.

Is she exhausted at bedtime? I know it seems counter intuitive, but sometimes if they are over tired it has a knock on effect on their sleep.

What time is she up for the day? And what times is she napping during the day?

I very much agree with this.

Sometimes if you miss their first natural sleepy moment, adrenalin kicks in and keeps waking them up or preventing sleep in the first place.

Also op, obviously you don’t want them to over-heat but if you think there is a chance they are waking up because they are cold; something like this might help…