Struggling to cope / I don’t know what to do for the best

[Potatobakes]

Please help :(

Our little boy is 20 months old. Recently this has been happening most nights (I’ve added a link because I can’t add a video to the post otherwise) https://imgur.com/a/vtePM9v

It is so distressing for him and for us. Going in seems to make things worse as he wants us to pick him up / take him out of the cot and as soon as we try to put him back in it starts again. The other night it lasted over 1.5 hours. I have tried going in and reassuring and leaving, staying in the room, getting him out the cot. Nothing seems to work. If we do get him out he will eventually calm down but it can take so long. It’s so awful. He’s such a happy boy in the day and this is like the total opposite. I don’t think he’s in pain. What do we do for the best? I know some people co-sleep but we’ve never done it and I’m pregnant so anxious not to create a habit that causes further issues later on.

I’m sorry, I ended up co-sleeping because it’s the only way I could sleep and not have to resort to leaving them crying. I don’t think it’s a bad habit personally. My 2 can now sleep alone despite co sleeping (well they share a room with their sibling)

It was a few tough years - they either sleep well or they don’t sadly. It’s up to you what method you use and what you’re comfortable with. Personally I have to comfort them in the night if they are upset. But co sleeping they would sleep soundly.

I realise it's really hard but - warning - I am for sleep training. A couple of thoughts: think of it as teaching him to settle and sleep. Also you say that nothing you are doing is working - consistency is the key so he can learn.
I think I would do the magic chair method. Leave him in his cot, stay in the room and re settle lying him down with no interaction. He knows you are there. It will take ages on the first attempt. You sound so desperate.

Thanks for replying. I know it may not be logical. I just can’t contemplate how we’d do that with a newborn too. But I agree, I am struggling to cope with the distress and don’t want him to be upset and without comfort. He’s never co-slept up until this point though so it feels like there must be another way

Thank you so much for this. I really appreciate it. I’ve actually booked a call with a sleep consultant. Apparently he’s too old for sleep training now :( I haven’t heard of the magic chair method. Thank you 🩷