Why is sleep training such a money making machine

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Everywhere I look there are sleep training consultants now with their own apps or instagram pages trying to sell a package with the secret to amazing baby sleep.
I get people need to make a living but it seems unfair that parents already living on very bad maternity pay are expected to pay for these packages. Is there anyone out there who has actually benefitted from using a baby sleep app or a sleep consultant. Is it all very obvious or are there actually magic secrets to baby sleeping that we are only allowed to know about if we pay a premium? Shouldn't it be obvious that we could get the same guidance from our GPs? At every appointment I go i am asked about whether as a new mum, I feel depressed or sad...well I might be if I carry on having awful sleep so could my health visitor or midwife at the hospital give me the same tips these sleep consultants charge a fortune for so that my lack of sleep doesn't turn into a depression?? Sorry this is a little bit of a rant at the Internet that has never ending information which ends up being both confusing and contradicting.

My DC never slept, woke hourly until they were both around 4 years old. I used to drive myself crazy reading all the different techniques and trying but inevitably failing with them. They've since been diagnosed with ADHD and I now know their brains are just wired differently and I doubt anything would have worked anyway. I think I compounded the lack of sleep with worrying about lack of sleep. If I'd just assumed it won't get better it might have actually been easier.

Unfortunately it is an unregulated industry and sleep deprived parents are desperate. I’ve paid 3 different sleep consultants in the last 3 years.
One of them was brilliant at signposting us to find the root cause of poor sleep. The others offered some variation of controlled crying and basically moral support and a hand hold to get you to believe ignoring your screaming baby is teaching them something.

GPs and midwives don’t routinely have baby sleep training. Neither do health visitors. They can share their opinions, but that’s about all. Some will be in favour of sleep training, others won’t. The science on whether it causes long term damage is generally poorly studied, and very divisive. It does tend to be accepted that sleep training doesn’t make young children sleep more, it just stops them from shouting out when they wake.

Most sleep consultants make money because sleep training goes against all your parental instincts, and some people find that very difficult. It wasn’t something I was against before my son was born, but I couldn’t have done it in reality, hearing him cry was like being physically in pain.

It’s a massive industry because a lot of parents have money, and will throw it at anything that makes life easier - and more sleep undeniably does. The sleep deprivation is probably the hardest part of parenting. Some try to do a decent job of supporting parents, others just make shit up, it’s completely unregulated. A lot of it is pot luck on whether it’ll work for your child… or for how long for. Some of the worst sleepers I know were sleep trained - but I’ll admit it was a tempting idea when our toddlers were one and theirs were sleeping through, while mine woke every three hours. Mine now usually sleeps through and they have far harder nights. That’s not the case for everyone, though. Some kids learn it and keep it. Most learn it but need to be retrained a few times a year for the first five years or so at least. Some won’t respond to sleep training at all.

By the time I contacted a Sleep Consultant things were SO fu*king horrendous that I would have paid her triple had she asked for it!

There’s no law saying a new parents must pay for sleep training services! Do it yourself. Or don’t. Or pay someone. What’s your point?

First off, as you pointed out, no one needs these as they can go to their doctor/hv/internet for the same basic information.
For those who chose to get a consultation/ help with sleep regulations, they are paying for tine, service, support things you don't get from a quick doctor's visit.
No one is forced or pressured to use the services, same as no one makes you get baby pictures or go to classes . You can choose to, at your own selection, and some of those choices are more expensive than others

Desparation.

Because lack of sleep makes you desperate.

I'd probably have sold my first born to someone who could get my second to sleep.

I'm a sleep trainer but I now help for free for friends and friends of friends. I offer remote advice and support via WhatsApp.

I think like with all things, these people have trained hard and are giving up their time to help you. Up to you if you want to pay it, there's lots of free advice out there online now.

Yeah, I don't get the 'unfairness' argument. It's a service that people can pay for or not, as with a lot of things in our society.

I used Julia fensom aster a mn recommended it. £180 and dc slept through 12 hours ever since except for when she’s poorly (which is often atm due to starting nursery).

She actually undid a lot of the harm hospital/mw/hv had taught me about feeding on demand.

sleep training saved us. I let dc cry. But she’s thriving and the happiest little girl.

I’d imagine if you spend hundreds of pounds you’ll get at least an hour or two of input, personalised to you and your baby, maybe more, maybe a service where you can text/call for follow up support, Do you think the NHS has spare people sitting around to do this?

I haven’t ever paid for a sleep consultant but I can see why people do. Online advice is often openly contradictory. I literally read an article yesterday which had the top 4
reasons for baby not sleeping as: bedtime is too early, bed time is too late, too many naps, too few naps. I have no idea how to work out which one of those applies to my baby 😂 if someone else can work out which it is and advise me on what to do
about it, that’d be lovely. But I think it would take more than 5 mins with the GP to unpick.

I just want to make clear that I'm not complaining about paying for a service someone has trained in and put in hours to deliver. .. i understand people cant work for free!. I was just venting at how there are so many consultants and companies with different approaches...it's really hard to pick one as I suppose it is all trial and error. I have read up on the free blogs and websites but ultimately, I understand all babies are different. I don't know i just feel like having babies is like the oldest thing done on earth and it's mind boggling how there isn't some sort of free solid advice to get you started. Just like someone pointed out above, it's all very well saying baby is understimulated or over tired or undertired but I which one is it lol My post stemmed from me over scrolling and buying into an online programme... only for the programme to tell me to let my 10 week old stay awake for 2 hours and this is the wake window for their sleep tracker. So straight away I can't use this because my DC won't stay awake longer than 1.5hrs... (:

It’s because grown adults think they need permission from a “sleep consultant” to do cry it out.

and yes most if not all the methods are CIO at the heart of it when you strip it down… they’re just careful in the language they use to market their services e.g., “gentle sleep training methods”

but all babies will cry til they get used to settling on their own in their cot.

saved myself a fortune and got my little one used to being put down from an early age - from 8 weeks - and he goes down fine on his own now.

but I didn’t need people like just chill mama charging me money for what I can do for myself using common sense.

A sleep consultant helped us a lot. It gave us a specific method instead of the bewildering array of online options. It also gave us someone to hold our hands, be supportive, and tailor our plan to our circumstances. It’s a luxury but I was very grateful for it.

Because in desperation people will pay snake oil men. They sow the seeds of doubt in people's minds so they don't trust their instincts and then promise a cure.

I agree. It's definitely about the permission thing. 14 years ago my dd was a baby and I read loads of book and they gave me the permission and confidence to sleep train. Now I think parents want a shortcut but you can do the research yourself and make a plan and stick with it - that is the key.

So much harder when it’s your first child too and you think you have to jump as soon as they whimper. Not saying to abandon them for prolonged periods in distress but generally if they’re fed, clean nappy, not too hot or cold or unwell then they’re fine for a few minutes

My GP wouldn't do the referral for the tongue tie snip, not write a prescription for lactose free formula. I'm not sure they would have helped with sleep either.

This is my world with my Ds … I would cat nap whilst he watched DVD’s . I thought people saying there kids didn’t sleep was going through the same thing. It appears there idea of a good night’s sleep and mine were very different .

sleep consultants are just banking on the desperation of sleep deprived parents .

same as diet industry banks on people not curing their weight issues

Omg you're so right.

Sleep is SUCH a big deal, and sleep deprivation so devastating to your mental health.

Every time I ask the HV about it their response is just 🤷 Why isn't there training on infant sleep for HV?

I think most sleep consultants are snake oil salesmen. Infant sleep is a lot less controllable than they advertise. However, there is SOME research on infant sleep, I'm sure there are SOME things you can do... But HV don't seem to know about it...

I think the point is, sleep issues are such a root cause of depression and anxiety in post partum period, making it a huge public health issue for mom, however its not something you can readily or affordably find any assistance on.

Yes - summed up perfectly, thank you!

Back when Sure Start was going strong there were good baby sleep clinics in my area. I agree, I think it is really important and more help should be available.

Because when its silly o clock in the morning, and you have a child who wont sleep, and when this has been happening for night on end, you will try ANYTHING.

Oh and also it feels like everyone and their neighbour have children who sleep through consistently.

I paid for 2 courses when DS was around 1yrs of age: one was a ferber method, and the other was the gradual retreat methid.

We tried everything. DS is now 3 and has only started sleeping through in the last few months. I think a lot of that was just us repeating that you're a big boy now and you need to sleep on your own and then he just did.