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Transition from BFing and Co-sleeping - help please!

2 replies

Icanttakethisanymore · 02/12/2024 10:00

I have a 1 yo (1 in mid Nov) who is BF. We have been co-sleeping since birth. It's not something I did with my eldest (now 3) but for most of the year it has enabled me to get an ok-ish amount of sleep. The 1yo is a big baby, eats well and has no developmental or health concerns. I need help stopping BFing at night and transitioning him to his own sleep space because I have reached the end of my tether.

My OH can put him to bed so he doesn't need to feed to sleep. Sometimes when I put him to sleep he'll settle off the breast too. However, he then wakes multiple times in the night; he's never slept for longer than 3 hours and often it's every 1-2 hours and I feed him back to sleep but I can then roll away from him. This is actually not my big issue, it's not great but I can deal with it because I go back to sleep quickly. The bit that I really can not take any more is that from about 3;30/4am ish, when he wakes, it becomes increasingly difficult to get him back to sleep and to roll away from him. He often needs to be latched almost constantly between 4am and 6am in order to keep him sleep. I lie there awake and uncomfortable but scared to move because if he wakes up then i might not be able to get him back to sleep and then I have to get up at 4:30am or 5am or whatever it is (I've done a lot of those).

I need something to change. I work FT and we have a very full life. I can't handle this anymore.

I've spoken to my OH and he suggested he sleeps with the baby to break the BFing to sleep habit. Obviously I want to make this as easy as possible for everyone. Does anyone have any suggestions for this transition?

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
robinmarl · 02/12/2024 10:11

My daughter was a little bit older than your baby (16 months) but we were in the same position re cosleeping and BFing. She’d start the night in her cot and end up in our bed every night. It wasn’t ideal but we ended up night weaning cold turkey, I had to go away for a night and my husband cuddled her/offered milk from a cup when she woke up. They had one rough night. The next night he did the same, she slept for 7 hours. She was sleeping right through in her cot within a few days. I continued BF at bedtime and when she woke up until she lost interest at about 22 months. If your son eats plenty during the day, I’d have no concerns doing similar! Good luck!

Icanttakethisanymore · 02/12/2024 10:18

robinmarl · 02/12/2024 10:11

My daughter was a little bit older than your baby (16 months) but we were in the same position re cosleeping and BFing. She’d start the night in her cot and end up in our bed every night. It wasn’t ideal but we ended up night weaning cold turkey, I had to go away for a night and my husband cuddled her/offered milk from a cup when she woke up. They had one rough night. The next night he did the same, she slept for 7 hours. She was sleeping right through in her cot within a few days. I continued BF at bedtime and when she woke up until she lost interest at about 22 months. If your son eats plenty during the day, I’d have no concerns doing similar! Good luck!

I am literally welling up reading this 😂

Thank you for sharing your experience.

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