Pregnant and losing will to live. 13 month old won't sleep!

[boymamaof2]

Much as above. My 13mo has never been a good sleeper, we co slept until he was around 9 months and managed to transition him into a cot and he is now sharing a room with his (nearly) 4 year old brother.

He is waking multiple times in the night looking for a feed. He is only breastfed, he refuses a bottle and has done since a few weeks old and will happily drink water from a sippy cup but not milk. When I do feed him he'll take forever to settle, if I try to rush him into the cot I have to start the process over again. Even when he does sleep he'll be awake again in an hour.

I don't know what to do. I'm going back to work next week (shift working nurse) and I'm nearly 3 months pregnant. I can't be waking up multiple times a night and then going to work. He refuses naps too. Will cry until he falls asleep (obviously go in and try to soothe him but it doesn't seem to be helping), unless I feed him to sleep. It's slightly easier when his dad puts him down but not much. Will happily sleep on the go in the pushchair though.

I'm at a loss and I don't know what to do to make it better. Help. Please.

Does he have a dummy? If not I know it's late to introduce one but it might fix the problem for you if they can comfort themselves with the dummy instead of a breastfeed.

He doesn't, no. I did try with him with multiple different kinds but he just projected them across the too. This was months and months ago though so it may be worth a try. I feel like I will try anything at this stage

Get the Ferber sleep training book.

I had a similar situation with my little one. She’s gone back to being a terrible sleeper to be honest but for a while she did a lot better (6-7 hours a night)
I decided to ween of breast milk (as I was pregnant with twins and my supply was running low anyway. Wasn’t what I wanted at the time at all but the decision was kind of out of my hands. Anyway this is what we did…
partner took over nights. I still breastfed but not to sleep. And then partner would get DD to sleep. You said it was a bit better when your husband does it, get him to do it every night if possible.
Partner would go in and soothe at any wake up. If DD was particularly stressed o would breastfed but partner settled majority of times.
It was really tough for about 2 weeks but then settled down and like I said she started doing 6-7 hour stretches.
in my case she’s gone back to being really hard to settle (teething and an illness haven’t helped)
You're little one is younger then mine was when I weaned (she was 18 months) so you might not be ready yet.
good luck with whatever you do x

@Brightandbreezey thanks for this, it's really helpful. I think we will give it a go and see if it works. The boys do share a room which is my other worry, when he screams he really screams and my poor other son will have to listen. I think DP will have to take him into our room to settle him.

It's hard as I don't feel he is ready to wean but I haven't left myself a lot of time at all or much choice. I suspect my supply will dip hormonally in the next month or so and this may make it easier in that regard, it did with my first but he was much older. I think my biggest fear is the night shifts when I'm not here at all, I'm worried how he's going to settle if he gets really worked up but I guess he's going to have to figure it out with his dad 😭

It’s so hard stopping breastfeeding if it’s not really what you want to do. I cried so much about it! Think I took it worse than my DD. And to be honest now she’s gone back to being hard to settle I wish I could just feed her to sleep now!! 😂
But for some people it does help and if your supply is going to decrease anyway it may be best to make a start on reducing your little one. But completely your choice!
the nights you’re not there, could you express a little so your husband has that option? Or try some cows milk?
its really good he settles for your husband and I’m sure they will work it out together when you’re at work xx